I am about to explode..

Ronnie&Theresa Posted: Feb 19, 2003 12:58 PM

I am about to explode..

My MOH tells me..

YOu have to invite (her sister) to the e party.

I said NO.. Its my party and I don't want her there..

She shows no respect for anyone. She tried to play Ronnie out on your bday in front of my father. She asked him. 'Ron do you believe in GOD?' knowing Ronnie doesn't discuss religion in front of Dad bc of his love and faith for GOD..

She comes to my mothers house with no gifts or card or congrats to me when my mother goes above and beyond for her when she was married and had children.. She did SQUAT!!

Edited to say...

She made my MOH cry and has had altercations with her in the past.. I am sorry my MOH doesn't care enuff about her self But I do and won't tolerate that behavior when I am around.

So I don't want her there. I told MOH I am sorry you don't love yourself enuff to tell her' GET Out of my life' but I don't want her there..

She is trying to guilt trip me saying ' I would do it for you' well. I wouldn't want her to. I don't let anyone walk all over me and its not about to start now.

WHAT DO YOU THINK?

I am not having her.

But I wrote MOH a letter..
Telling her. Its my PARTY MY DAY .. Tell her if she has a problem that she isn't invited to call me...

RIGHT?

Edited again..

She is a first cousin

Misty Posted: Feb 19, 2003 01:00 PM

Re: I am about to explode..

It is your party....she shouldn't make you do anything. If you don't have a relationship with the girl, she's going to just have to understand....period!

Ronnie&Theresa Posted: Feb 19, 2003 01:01 PM

Re: I am about to explode..

She's la familgia..

You know..

But Mom says. Do what you want. I am not getting involved!

p&a91203 Posted: Feb 19, 2003 01:03 PM

Re: I am about to explode..

I agree...Its your and your FH's party- you don't HAVE to invite anyone you don't want to. Is this girl family or something? If so...then the situation can get a little sticky- if not, I say stick your guns!

Helene718 Posted: Feb 19, 2003 01:03 PM

Re: I am about to explode..

Invite whomever you want. You don't owe anyone an explanation. It's your party.

Misty Posted: Feb 19, 2003 01:04 PM

Re: I am about to explode..

How is she related to you?

Ronnie&Theresa Posted: Feb 19, 2003 01:05 PM

Re: I am about to explode..

First cuz!

Helene718 Posted: Feb 19, 2003 01:06 PM

Re: I am about to explode..

Will she make a scene if she is there or will it be even more of a scene if you don't invite her?

eroxgirl Posted: Feb 19, 2003 01:06 PM

Re: I am about to explode..

You know what I don't understand? How these people don't know you yet...I mean, it is obvious to me that you're not the type of person who does things just to keep other people quiet if its against your better judgment, so why would your MOH think that you would invite someone who has crossed you before?

If she has problems dealing with her sister, she should send her to you, just as you've told her to. Its not like she's not inviting her own sister -- its not for her to say!

Edited to say: You didn't say she was a cousin when I started my reply... but so what? Do what you want!

p&a91203 Posted: Feb 19, 2003 01:07 PM

Re: I am about to explode..

Ouch! Well...do you talk to this person...are you presently on civil terms with her? Is not inviting her going to cause world war III in your family?

Ronnie&Theresa Posted: Feb 19, 2003 01:09 PM

Re: I am about to explode..

Thanks Rebecca..

They always say THERESA act like an adult.. I think having this party paying for it and getting married is ADULT like and I refuse for anyone to be mistreated that I love when I am around.. NO one listens to me..

UGH!

No scene the family is sick of her!

Helene718 Posted: Feb 19, 2003 01:10 PM

Re: I am about to explode..

Why invite her then?

nrvbrd Posted: Feb 19, 2003 01:10 PM

Re: I am about to explode..

It is obvious you feel strongly about this.

Tell you MOH point blank that you will NOT invite her and to please respect your decision. Also tell her that you hope that your feelings for her sis will not change the friendship you two share.

I think this is a situation where approach and delivery is very important- a term I learned from the NW Board.

WithThisRing Posted: Feb 19, 2003 01:11 PM

Re: I am about to explode..

T: do what you want. If you dont want her there, then dont invite her. Its your party.

Could be like my family, my cousin Summer (first cuz) is getting married this year and because her father and my mom (who are brother and sister) are at wars she didnt invite my parents and I to her engagement party and we're not invited to the wedding because her father and my mother dont get along.

So I am not inviting her to anything of mine.

I think with everyone's wedding there is always some type of family issues.

So I just say oh hell its my party and i will invite who i want to invite. you do the same.

eroxgirl Posted: Feb 19, 2003 01:12 PM

Re: I am about to explode..

I think the best thing for you to do is call this girl (cousin, whatever) directly and tell her straight out - I'm not inviting you, don't harass the rest of the family about it. Give her reasons only if you feel its necessary (like as if she doesn't know why!)

And then you get to say you handled the situation like an ADULT!

shelzyp Posted: Feb 19, 2003 01:13 PM

Re: I am about to explode..

If everyone is sick of her, and you don't like her I would say then don't invite her. But if you think that you might later in life be friendly with her, then I would invite her. JMO

Ronnie&Theresa Posted: Feb 19, 2003 01:13 PM

Re: I am about to explode..

My MOh always has drama and is the center of conflict..

I said KATH..

Tel her here is my # and I will tell her why I don't want her there and to leave you out of it..

THANK GOD WE GET MARRIED ONCE!

Sassy Posted: Feb 19, 2003 01:13 PM

Re: I am about to explode..

I have a similar situation.
My First Cuz did not come to my Mother's funeral after my Mom did soooo much for her, and helped raise her as a child.
So I cut her off, and said she is NOT invited to the wedding, even though all the other close cousins are. And her Mother is invitited too...
Her Mother has never ONCE tried to make me invite her, b/c she knows how I feel on the subject. SO I say STAND YOUR GROUND. You know in your heart why she cannot be invited, she is disrespectful to you, Ronnie. Why would you want her there?

Ronnie&Theresa Posted: Feb 19, 2003 01:14 PM

Re: I am about to explode..

Rebecca..

I don't think as an ADULT that I have to justify who I invite and who I don't..

No?

Helene718 Posted: Feb 19, 2003 01:29 PM

Re: I am about to explode..

Like I said, you invite whomever you want and you do NOT owe anyone ANY explanations. If anyone asks, just say that it was a difficult decision, but I did what I felt was best and I would prefer not to discuss it any further.