I am feeling insecure- wedding pressure

nrvbrd Posted: Apr 10, 2003 10:14 AM

I am feeling insecure- wedding pressure

Next month FH and I are going to the wedding of a girl he grew up with a family friend.

Her wedding will be at the very place that I wanted to book ours, but could not afford. It is a lovely place on the water.

Her parents are pretty much paying for it so I am sure no expense will be spared.

Alot of these same people will be coming to my wedding 4 months later. I am worried mine will not measure up and people will undoubtedly compare.

I know I should not think like this but I keep having this sinking feeling that her wedding will outdo mine.

I know I am being pathetic.

shelzyp Posted: Apr 10, 2003 10:16 AM

Re: I am feeling insecure- wedding pressure

I wouldn't worry about, take things that go a bit wrong fomr her wedding and make sure they don't go wrong at your. Make sure all of the detailed things are done, I pay more attention to the little things, like coordination, things that take time, and not money.

NYCMeghan Posted: Apr 10, 2003 10:18 AM

Re: I am feeling insecure- wedding pressure

People go to a wedding to celebrate the couple. No one remembers the details - all they remember is how much fun they had. Your wedding will be absolutely as wonderful as hers, probably even better. Don't worry sweetie!

Stacey1403 Posted: Apr 10, 2003 10:18 AM

Re: I am feeling insecure- wedding pressure

Don't worry! Most of my friends and myself have all gotten or are getting married within months of each other! Your wedding will be a blast because it is your wedding! Don't worry about what other people think!!! Just enjoy your special day

7-11 Posted: Apr 10, 2003 10:19 AM

Re: I am feeling insecure- wedding pressure

i understand how you feel. my moh is getting married 3 weeks after me. all of our friends are going to be at both. Her family has money and is paying for it, they will have like 400 people to my 125. Band to my dj. Like 5 limos to my 1. Huge flower arrangements.
But im happy with what i picked and i think its me. Its going to be simple and elegant. that is how you should look at it. people will always compare, i do it too, but they will have a great time at yours and that is what counts, not how big or expensive it is.

your wedding will be great

Anniegrl Posted: Apr 10, 2003 10:21 AM

Re: I am feeling insecure- wedding pressure

Yup, NYCMeghan is right. How many weddings have you gone to where you actually remembered stuff about it? It's not until you're planning your own wedding when you start to really notice details. All I ever really remember about weddings that I've gone to is the food! I barely remember my own siblings' weddings.

Don't worry about it - your wedding will be special in it's own way

Niecey Posted: Apr 10, 2003 10:23 AM

Re: I am feeling insecure- wedding pressure

Don't you dare feel insecure. Your love, feelings and emotions (not to mention hard work in planning) of that day will be what will shine and your wedding will be just as lovely, happy and wonderful as any other!!!

It is not a price tag that will make a wedding special. I have been to fancy outrageous $$$$ weddings and they were not anything better than those at less expensive places...actually some were really boring and had so little food (just fancy stuff and very little of that)!!!

MarcellaBella Posted: Apr 10, 2003 10:26 AM

Re: I am feeling insecure- wedding pressure

no way!!!!! K, you are crazy.. in no way will her wedding be better than yours!!! regardless of where it's being held, it's the little things that people usuallly remember.. remember that.. you have all of us here at liweddings to help you with that!!!

Ronnie&Theresa Posted: Apr 10, 2003 10:27 AM

Re: I am feeling insecure- wedding pressure

I want to Smack you now..

YOur wedding is about the profession of your love to one another..

WT F does it matter where it is ..

COmeon.. YOU of ALL people should knowbetter!

Scoop Posted: Apr 10, 2003 10:29 AM

Re: I am feeling insecure- wedding pressure

It's not about how much money everyone spends on their wedding...it's celebrating the union of the happy couple. I wouldn't stress about anything.

Eveyone has different budgets & styles...which makes every wedding unique in its own way. Happy planning and I wish you all the best. I'm sure your wedding will be beautiful.

Sassy Posted: Apr 10, 2003 10:30 AM

Re: I am feeling insecure- wedding pressure

I can't believe I'm hearing you K.
Don't give it another thought !!!!!!!!!!!

nrvbrd Posted: Apr 10, 2003 10:30 AM

Re: I am feeling insecure- wedding pressure

Thanks ladies- you are the best!!!

This wedding stuff really gets to me sometimes.

Sage10.03 Posted: Apr 10, 2003 10:31 AM

Re: I am feeling insecure- wedding pressure

Don't you DARE feel that way.....Your wedding is going to be amazing b/c IT'S YOUR WEDDING!!!!

And all your friends are they to see you and your fh get married, have fun, and celebrate....NOT to compare your wedding to anyone elses.....

Just relax, radiate, enjoy your planning and your day and so will everyone else

curly2003 Posted: Apr 10, 2003 10:32 AM

Re: I am feeling insecure- wedding pressure

I can understand how you feel. I too sometimes think of what my wedding would be like IF I had more $$. BUT, I love what i have planned so far and just remind myself that it's going to be the best wedding ever because it is MY wedding Think about that babe!!!

karen32 Posted: Apr 10, 2003 10:34 AM

Re: I am feeling insecure- wedding pressure

your wedding day will be special b/c it's about the 2 of you!!!! $$$ has no bearing on this.

honestly, FI's best friend got married last year and they spared no expense. and you know what - it was the most boring wedding i had ever been to. to keep it 'classy' they told the DJ to just play all slow, slow songs (find me a man who enjoys slow-dancing for 5 straight hours!!!!!!). the food was way too fru-fru for me (1st course was asparagus flan w/smoked salmon).

your day is all about you guys! that's all that matters.

cw0904 Posted: Apr 10, 2003 10:36 AM

Re: I am feeling insecure- wedding pressure

Keish are you serious?? Come on girl I have heard of 100K weddings and 20K weddings. And most of those 100K weddings did NOT compare to the others. Its what you and your FH make of your day is what matters and should matter. All those little things you have done, all the time and work you put in to your day will be noticed. Trust me. The love that you feel for each other should be the most important than anything else.

And quite honestly, don’t you feel proud to say we paid for this wedding ourselves without anyone’s help? I sure do. Although we are getting a bit from our folks, we are paying for the biggest chunk. Some people I know have had their parents pay for their entire reception and complained of having no money W T F !!!??? That I don’t see anything to complain about. It sounds more bratty to me than anything else.

Be proud of what you are doing girl. Be proud you can save money for what you want and are doing it.

Crisco718 Posted: Apr 10, 2003 10:42 AM

Re: I am feeling insecure- wedding pressure

K!!! Why are you causing yourself unnecessary stress. Your wedding will be special because of the hard work you are putting into it. It is not about all of the extra's (the place, the flowers, how much was spent). It is all about the love you have for your FH.

With all of the planning for my wedding, the thing that people keep commenting on is the fact that my DH had such a great time. He sang and cried as I came down the aisle, he sang as we did our first dance and not only did I feel the love, but so did all of my guests. These are the special things that you will remember about your day!!!

Olgaki Posted: Apr 10, 2003 10:49 AM

Re: I am feeling insecure- wedding pressure

All the fancy weddings we went too were HORRIBLE!!! Me and mom always say that they fee so cold - 400 people who aren't like relatives or superclose friends (which no way could be all 400 people) makes a wedding feel so cold!!!! You never get to really see the couple because they are always with someone else. Though there is probably a lot of dancing, everyone is segmented. With the smaller weddings, I notice how everyone kind of gets together even if they don't know each other - it's cozy! As long as you've planned for cozy and elegant (which I know you have!) You will be fine! My cousins wedding is a year before mine and she having more than twice the people!!! Mine is at about 100 but it is all people I know and love so I hope it will be very cozy and a wedding people remember because they all felt important that day because I actually got to interact with them!

wacky Posted: Apr 10, 2003 10:50 AM

Re: I am feeling insecure- wedding pressure

HELLO come hear and lets talk.

First of all, the wedding is about you and hubby.

Dont get down on yourself. Didnt you ever hear the saying you cant judge a book by its cover.

How do you know they didnt get a really good deal or something. Please

Now smile, be happy,