I am not enjoying this anymore...

So, I know I'm not on the site all that much but any support/words of wisdom would be appreciated.

My wedding is 2/29/08 and everything is booked. Literally all that's missing are the right before the wedding confirm flower choices, cake, etc. Everything is done.

Well, last week I had Thurs/Fri off. I asked my mom to come down and go dress shopping. I am not girly at all and I knew I would hate it. I did. I cried and I cried some more. I lost 120 lbs. when I met my fiance. I was unhealthy and terribly sick. He got me back on track and from that, I gained about 50 lbs back. Dress shopping made me feel horrible about myself and absolutely hate this wedding. I knew I would never go dress shopping again after last week so I bought this: http://davidsbridal.com/bridal_gowns_detail.jsp?stid=1242&prodgroup=134

Sorry I can't paste a picture but you get the idea. I didn't want to spend a lot because I knew I would hate the dresses and because my wedding isn't my entire life or focus. My dress will be the one pictures with the apple red sash that hangs the full length of the train. What does everyone think?

I'm so emotionally drained that I'm not even happy. Wedding planning was great but the dress experience was horrific and now I'm unhappy. I do like the dress. It doesn't come in until June so maybe I can get skinny again.

Ugh. I'm so drained/sad.

Anyone want a workout buddy at Bally's in Levittown? Or a Weight Watchers via email buddy?

Maybe if I wasn't so big right now I would feel better.

Sorry for my rant. It's just one of those days...or weeks.