We have talked about this for 2 days, both very lengthy talks but it just feels like we keep going in circles. I keep apologizing and he keeps saying that he doesn't know if he could get past this.
Posted by Justinsbabie32
Correct me if I'm wrong but your wedding date is 2010 which seems a bit stange to me ,but maybe in the next 6 years he will feel diffrent . Something is a little![]()
Posted by luvsun27
I was in a similar situation many years ago. I was engaged...and the ex decided that something was not right and wanted to postpone (he wasn't ready). I said no...either now or never. So...we broke up. I lost thousands of $$$$ due to canceling contracts....and at the time, it was so hard...it took me a long time to get over it. Looking back...it was the best thing that ever happened to me. He was too immature at the time...and we would have been miserable. I have now found my true love.
That being said...perhaps he is threatened by your financial success? Alot of men cannot handle women who make more/contribute more financially....they feel like they should be the providers. You need to seriouslly figure out if you want to marry this man, now or in the future, if he does not want to work things out.
What is his reason for postponing....just for more time? To save more money? If he doesn't want to go to counseling...to help solve the issue, what is the extra time for?
Good luck....please FM if you need to talk.
Posted by MrHostility
This sounds like a problem that was posted the other day. I won't say what, in case it is, but maybe not.
You need to talk about why the comment hurt him so much that he isn't willing to marry you. Maybe he thinks it's bothered you the whole time, or does he think you changed as a person because of this?
I agree, don't get married under utlimatium. Start off on the wrong foot, things can only get worse.
Posted by jill13bean
Posted by MrHostility
This sounds like a problem that was posted the other day. I won't say what, in case it is, but maybe not.
You need to talk about why the comment hurt him so much that he isn't willing to marry you. Maybe he thinks it's bothered you the whole time, or does he think you changed as a person because of this?
I agree, don't get married under utlimatium. Start off on the wrong foot, things can only get worse.
I know what you are talking about... i remember reading it....
i agree with you 100%
Good luck with this bride that needs advice
i am thinking about you![]()
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things will work out for the best in the end!
What is the DEAL? all these hidden meanings, anyway, it seems like there are a lot of Other Issues that you don't want to talk about, basically I think only you and your partner can decide what is best for you both. If you can't communicate and work together to resolve your issues, then maybe thats a sign to Not get Married. Don't let the 'Wedding' get in the way of how you feel about this relationship and each others feelings, you can't be selfish and worry about the whole plans for the wedding - you need to Stop it all and focus on these hurt feelings and things that your partner can 't seem to get past, thats whats important right now. He's letting you know now, there are still issues that he thinks are not going to make things work for you guys - Listen to what he's saying. I don't know what will be the end result but it sure sounds like this wedding isn't going to happen and giving someone an ultimatum is not a good way to go into a marriage, that person will always resent that.
Being a therapist, I often notice that men are too cowardly to tell a woman that they want to end their relationship. They seem to hope that the woman will end it for him. Do you think that is what is going on?
Posted by am470
Being a therapist, I often notice that men are too cowardly to tell a woman that they want to end their relationship. They seem to hope that the woman will end it for him. Do you think that is what is going on?
