I can't take it anymore....

I just need to vent because I feel like I am going to explode inside.
I have had the unfortunate experience of living with my parents before my wedding. We did it to help save money, but it is not worth all the money in the world as far as I am concerned. Everyday lately, I am reverted back to being 8 years old when my mother SCREAMS at me for different things. I am 26 years old. I do not need to be screamed at by ANYONE. I don't care who they are.
I was awake for about 5 minutes this morning when my mother started FREAKING out because of stupid minutia for my wedding. She was mad at where the hair dresser wants to do everyone's hair. Fine, is that a reason to scream F-CK YOU at me? Apparently it was a good enough reason for her. I am starting to hate my own mother. She treats me like I am some piece of sh-t on the street.
Then, after screaming at me, she tries to turn it around on me and say that it's all ME. That she can't TALK TO ME. Well, no, not when I've been awake for less than five minutes and YOU are freaking out. I don't want to talk to her when she's like that.
She's ALWAYS miserable. All she ever does is complain about how terrible her life is. I know, it must be SO hard to live in a brand new house, drive a brand new car, make your own hours at work and have my father cater to you. It's a terrible life She complains EVERY SINGLE DAY when she gets home from work that she's TOO OLD for working (she's 52!), and that no one else has the right to be tired because she does so much more than the rest of us. Meanwhile, my poor father drives over an hour each way to work everyday and works WAY MORE than my mother EVER WOULD and he NEVER complains. My mother is so f-ing psycho. I just cannot take it anymore. I try not to feed into it. I never yell back at her and I try to walk away, but it's SO hurtful when you're mother is screaming f-ck you to your face a week before your wedding. I just cannot wait to get the hell out of this house and never look back.
Thanks for letting me vent. I just needed to get that off my chest

Rachel, I'm so sorry. Hang in there, your day is so soon. When do you guys move out?

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Posted by brooklynbridezilla

When do you guys move out?

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I'm not coming back, except to get my things. The night before my wedding is the last night I EVER HAVE TO SLEEP HERE! It will be a very joyous occassion.

I'm SO sorry you are going through this Sometimes parents think that just because they are parents they have the right to treat their children like crap - which of course they don't.

Just try to focus on your quickly approaching wedding and your wonderful future FH. I hope for your sanity you are moving out shortly after your wedding? If not, perhaps after the wedding your mom will mellow out or find something/someone else on which to focus her negative energy. Good luck

I don't have an answer for you but looks like you can use some

Aww! All I can say is that the weeks leading up to my wedding were as difficult for my mom as they were for me! Our relationship is so much better now that I have moved out. It just helps them realize that you are an adult. I think living in your childhood room sometimes it is hard for them to realize that things are different and you are 26 and an adult. Only a few more days!

Rachel - i went through the same thing right before I got married as well. I think it's a sign that your mother is having a hard time letting go, and is feeling stress about your upcoming wedding.
No, that doesn't make it any easier, and no that doesn't make it right.....but I think you can be fairly certain that it's going to get a lot better after you are married and have some separation.

My last night at home - my father screamed at me for something and had me in tears.....he called me the next day to apologize and ask me if I would come back home for one more night so that we could re-do my last night at home.
It's a tough time for them as well.

I think we could trade our mothers and not notice a difference
They're even around the same age.

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Posted by palebride

I think we could trade our mothers and not notice a difference
They're even around the same age.

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Well, mine is for sale! I'm getting cash for that beyotch!

oh - and even though I'll be 30 in November, and I'm married, both of my parents still treat me like I'm 10 . I don't think that will ever change!

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Posted by prncssrachel

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Posted by palebride

I think we could trade our mothers and not notice a difference
They're even around the same age.

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Well, mine is for sale! I'm getting cash for that beyotch!

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If she's for sale - you'd better start saying some nice things about her!
No one is going to pay for her after this thread

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Posted by palebride

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Posted by prncssrachel

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Posted by palebride

I think we could trade our mothers and not notice a difference
They're even around the same age.

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Well, mine is for sale! I'm getting cash for that beyotch!

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If she's for sale - you'd better start saying some nice things about her!
No one is going to pay for her after this thread

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That's alright, there's some sadistic f-cker who will buy her off ebay

I moved out when I was 24 and did not come back, but despite that my mother has still gone nutso on me a few times, to the point where I was stunned that she'd say/do things like that (like hanging up on me over something stupid, then calling a couple days later like nothing had happened.) I feel bad because she's my mom but it still makes me and Hang in there!

Aww I felt the same way--I actually went to boarding school at 13 and hadn't lived with my mom until post-college when we started saving $! But I do think the wedding planning is to some extent as hard on moms as it is on us. There's no excuse for how she treated you, but it sounds like she is just so stressed!

Rachel, moving out & coming back is very difficult. DH & I both did it. I was only hoem for about 6 weeks & it was awful.

My mom flipped out when she cam home from work one Saturday afternoon & I told her Jean was coming over b/c she had decdied that that Saturday was a perfect time for me to take my comforter to the laundromat!

I can't imagine havign to plan my weddign under those circumsatances. We are much closer now that I haven't lived there in 4 1/2 years.

A friend of mine went through the same thing while planning her wedding--at one point her mother refused to coem to the ceremony , b/c the Monsignor wasn't marrying them!
By the time the wedding came around, it was like
that never happened!

There is no reason for her to treat you like this BUT since you mentioned she did the same thing to your sister right before she got married, it sounds like this is her way of getting over the fact that you are leaving for good.

Maybe she thinks that if shes mean to you and you in turn are mean to her that will make the transition easier.

I dont know - its just a random thought! I havent lived with my mom in almost 10 years!

I feel your pain. The surest way to hate your parents is to live with them past 18. It's just impossible any way you slice it. I'm so sorry. Just keep counting down the days, you'll be married and loving that, and REALLY loving hvaing the normalcy of just being with JT, no one else!

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Posted by nov04LIbride

Aww! All I can say is that the weeks leading up to my wedding were as difficult for my mom as they were for me! Our relationship is so much better now that I have moved out. It just helps them realize that you are an adult. I think living in your childhood room sometimes it is hard for them to realize that things are different and you are 26 and an adult. Only a few more days!

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I agree with Beth 100%.
Hang in there!!

Although my mom and I generally get along pretty well, we had some MAJOR blowouts while planning my wedding. There's something about it that brings out the worst in mothers. I'm sorry your mother is being so unnecessarily hurtful to you. Just keep reminding yourself that it stems from her own issues, not anything you have done or haven't done.