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I don't think I'm being too sensitive about this....

stacey&paul Posted:

I don't think I'm being too sensitive about this....

Oh The DRAMA!!!

I swear, it never ends. My FMIL bought or is going to buy her dress at a thrift store!!! Can you imagine?! On top of that she says it's biege!!!!! Ok, so maybe I wouldn't have a problem with beige if it weren't from a thrift store, but come on! It's not like the FILs are broke considering they take a vacation (like a cruise or a trip to Italy or to Vegas etc) every month! I can't help but feel like this isn't an important event for either of them. Don't get me wrong, I would understand if they just didnt have the means, but they do! I mean how's that going to look in the pictures? And then my mom tells me she doesnt even think my FMIL is going to wear a gown...I'm sorry if I sound like a b****, but I cant help it. It's not like they're even contributing to the wedding that they would have to skimp out on their attire. Is there any way to suggest to FMIL or to FH that she might want to get a little more dressed up considering it's a formal affair? I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings, but I cant help but feel like this needs to be addressed. Am I being unreasonable and selfish? How would you feel?
LaurenluvsTJ Posted:

Re: I don't think I'm being too sensitive about this....

I know how you feel- FSIL wanted to by the FG dress at a thrift store. I felt awful, like it the wedding was a low priority.
I also am dealing with the issue of FHs mom not wearing a formal gown, she is from OOT and I am not sure if she quite understands how moms dress for weddings here. I showed her a pic of my mom's gown to kind of clue her in... other than that, I dont know what to do about it. I feel for you....
Sweets14 Posted:

Re: I don't think I'm being too sensitive about this....

Don't stress about it! It's not worth ruining your day!!!

Shorty McBride Posted:

Re: I don't think I'm being too sensitive about this....

Not being sensitive at all!

Make sure you see the dress before you make a stink to her - theres a slim chance its not half bad!

If it is BAD, you can always say 'the dress doesn't flatter her' and take her to some dress shops!

Sorry you're dealing w/ this
prunepie Posted:

Re: I don't think I'm being too sensitive about this....

if money is a problem..then its no problem.

but if they are well off and she is buying a thrift store dress...then hun.... the only one who is gonna look silly is her.

now... there can be amazing thrift store dresses like on consignment.... so who knows..b

but how you put it doesnt sound like it.

dont stress.... trust me..she will regret it in the pics when she sees herself if everyone else is formal.

xoxo
ZuzusPetals Posted:

Re: I don't think I'm being too sensitive about this....

Posted by prunepie

if money is a problem..then its no problem.

but if they are well off and she is buying a thrift store dress...then hun.... the only one who is gonna look silly is her.

now... there can be amazing thrift store dresses like on consignment.... so who knows..b

but how you put it doesnt sound like it.

dont stress.... trust me..she will regret it in the pics when she sees herself if everyone else is formal.

xoxo



well said!!
nygirl77 Posted:

Re: I don't think I'm being too sensitive about this....

At least it's not YOUR mom-Think of it that way.

stacey&paul Posted:

Re: I don't think I'm being too sensitive about this....

Posted by nygirl77

At least it's not YOUR mom-Think of it that way.


that is so true.


Thanks to everyone for your replies!!!
stacey&paul Posted:

Re: I don't think I'm being too sensitive about this....

Posted by LaurenluvsTJ

I know how you feel- FSIL wanted to by the FG dress at a thrift store. I felt awful, like it the wedding was a low priority.
I also am dealing with the issue of FHs mom not wearing a formal gown, she is from OOT and I am not sure if she quite understands how moms dress for weddings here. I showed her a pic of my mom's gown to kind of clue her in... other than that, I dont know what to do about it. I feel for you....


waterspout4 Posted:

Re: I don't think I'm being too sensitive about this....

There are many nice dresses at thrift stores. And if she's comfortable in beige, then let her wear it. I guess I'm in the minority.

waterspout4 Posted:

Re: I don't think I'm being too sensitive about this....

Posted by waterspout4

There are many nice dresses at thrift stores. And if she's comfortable in beige, then let her wear it. I guess I'm in the minority.


BTW.... I just told my SIL to check out thrift stores for a tux for my nephew who is the ring bearer. It all looks the same.
lipglossjunky73 Posted:

Re: I don't think I'm being too sensitive about this....

Personally, I feel it doesnt matter what the FMIL - no one will even loko at her... my FMIL is a heavy woman who never really dresses up - I am not expecting her to look put together - I know its mean, but I can only worry about how I loko - I think if I worried about how anyone else is going to look, I would seriously lose my mind (I think I already lost my mind anyway...)

BTW - check out my new avatar - I think it goes well for this website - don't you???

stacey&paul Posted:

Re: I don't think I'm being too sensitive about this....

I love it!
stacey&paul Posted:

Re: I don't think I'm being too sensitive about this....

Posted by waterspout4

Posted by waterspout4

There are many nice dresses at thrift stores. And if she's comfortable in beige, then let her wear it. I guess I'm in the minority.


BTW.... I just told my SIL to check out thrift stores for a tux for my nephew who is the ring bearer. It all looks the same.


You might be right.
frosty Posted:

Re: I don't think I'm being too sensitive about this....

Posted by waterspout4

There are many nice dresses at thrift stores. And if she's comfortable in beige, then let her wear it. I guess I'm in the minority.


I agree. Personally, I didn't care where my mom or my MIL got their outfits. I just wanted them to be comfortable and happy with them.
ShortBride Posted:

Re: I don't think I'm being too sensitive about this....

There may be very beautiful dresses at a thrift store. In any event, there's not much you can do...

If it makes you feel any better, my mom and DH's mom ended up wearing THE EXACT SAME DRESS! they got it from two different stores, but it was the same dress! Luckily they like each other, and people thought they did it on purpose
nov04LIbride Posted:

Re: I don't think I'm being too sensitive about this....

Posted by stacey&paul

Posted by waterspout4

Posted by waterspout4

There are many nice dresses at thrift stores. And if she's comfortable in beige, then let her wear it. I guess I'm in the minority.


BTW.... I just told my SIL to check out thrift stores for a tux for my nephew who is the ring bearer. It all looks the same.


You might be right.


I have to agree. Have you seen the dress? Personally I would have bought my wedding dress at a thrift store if there was one I liked. I don't see the big deal at all, and think you are totally overreacting. Most of the thrift store formal dresses have only been worn once.

That said, what is wrong with beige? My mother and grandmother both wore beige, and I have no idea why anyone would have a problem with it.

Here is a picture of my mom and grandma in beige dresses. I would've had a problem with black, but beige?

I think with all the wedding planning, it is necessary to step back and think how it is really going to affect you. Pick your battles. What she wears isn't going to affect your day in any way.
stacey&paul Posted:

Re: I don't think I'm being too sensitive about this....

Posted by nov04LIbride

Posted by stacey&paul

Posted by waterspout4

Posted by waterspout4

There are many nice dresses at thrift stores. And if she's comfortable in beige, then let her wear it. I guess I'm in the minority.


BTW.... I just told my SIL to check out thrift stores for a tux for my nephew who is the ring bearer. It all looks the same.


You might be right.


I have to agree. Have you seen the dress? Personally I would have bought my wedding dress at a thrift store if there was one I liked. I don't see the big deal at all, and think you are totally overreacting. Most of the thrift store formal dresses have only been worn once.

That said, what is wrong with beige? My mother and grandmother both wore beige, and I have no idea why anyone would have a problem with it.

Here is a picture of my mom and grandma in beige dresses. I would've had a problem with black, but beige?

I think with all the wedding planning, it is necessary to step back and think how it is really going to affect you. Pick your battles. What she wears isn't going to affect your day in any way.




You are absolutely right and Thank You for that. It's just I'm picturing her showing up in a beige second hand pants suit which I can't help but feel is just not appropriate. I don't think there's anything wrong with beige as long as it's a pretty dress. I guess I'm just freaking out about everything lately. Seems like the closer it gets the more sensitive I become. What can I say? I have no idea what she will be wearing so I probably shouldn't worry about it....BTW You all look beautiful in that pic!!
Suzannebride Posted:

Re: I don't think I'm being too sensitive about this....

Maybe she wanted a really nice dress but couldn't afford it so she went to a thrift store in a ritzy area!

nov04LIbride Posted:

Re: I don't think I'm being too sensitive about this....

Posted by stacey&paul

Posted by nov04LIbride

Posted by stacey&paul

Posted by waterspout4

Posted by waterspout4

There are many nice dresses at thrift stores. And if she's comfortable in beige, then let her wear it. I guess I'm in the minority.


BTW.... I just told my SIL to check out thrift stores for a tux for my nephew who is the ring bearer. It all looks the same.


You might be right.


I have to agree. Have you seen the dress? Personally I would have bought my wedding dress at a thrift store if there was one I liked. I don't see the big deal at all, and think you are totally overreacting. Most of the thrift store formal dresses have only been worn once.

That said, what is wrong with beige? My mother and grandmother both wore beige, and I have no idea why anyone would have a problem with it.

Here is a picture of my mom and grandma in beige dresses. I would've had a problem with black, but beige?

I think with all the wedding planning, it is necessary to step back and think how it is really going to affect you. Pick your battles. What she wears isn't going to affect your day in any way.




You are absolutely right and Thank You for that. It's just I'm picturing her showing up in a beige second hand pants suit which I can't help but feel is just not appropriate. I don't think there's anything wrong with beige as long as it's a pretty dress. I guess I'm just freaking out about everything lately. Seems like the closer it gets the more sensitive I become. What can I say? I have no idea what she will be wearing so I probably shouldn't worry about it....BTW You all look beautiful in that pic!!


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