and i have to admit, i hated every moment of it. i asked my mom to please not give me a shower and she did so anyway.
lilnikita
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Re: i had my shower
Why did you hate it??
klingklang77
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Re: i had my shower
b/c i hated being the centre of attention and being watched. this has kind of made me decide to elope and just forget everything. if i cant do my shower, how will i do anything? i knew about the shower ahead of time and basically me and my mom are not on speaking terms. everything is absolutly miserable around here. i have no idea if this has contributed to the whole i hated my shower, but i am definitely going to elope. it is becoming more and more like my mom's wedding.
Nina
Posted:
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Re: i had my shower
Oh no. You are very fortunate to have had family that cared enough to do that for you.
Sorry you did not enjoy it
klingklang77
Posted:
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Re: i had my shower
Posted by Nina
Oh no. You are very fortunate to have had family that cared enough to do that for you.
Sorry you did not enjoy it
you know, you are absolutely right, i am lucky to have that. but when i have asked many times before to not do stuff like this, it kind of gets like they are just doing it for themselves. i dunno how to explain it, i probably sound like a brat, so i will just zip it now.
Nina
Posted:
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Re: i had my shower
Posted by klingklang77
Posted by Nina
Oh no. You are very fortunate to have had family that cared enough to do that for you.
Sorry you did not enjoy it
you know, you are absolutely right, i am lucky to have that. but when i have asked many times before to not do stuff like this, it kind of gets like they are just doing it for themselves. i dunno how to explain it, i probably sound like a brat, so i will just zip it now.
No I can understand. I'm sorry it had to be that way sweetie Eloping is not necessarily a bad thing
amyg1033
Posted:
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Re: i had my shower
wow, you sound really ungrateful. If people want to throw you a shower, the least you could do was appreciate the trouble they went to. Instead of complaining that it's like your 'mother's wedding,' just be happy that you have a mother that is alive to share this with you. I have a friend whose mother passed away and she would give anything to have her mother be there for her to throw her a shower and I'm sure there are a lot of brides out there that feel the same way.
ML110
Posted:
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Re: i had my shower
wow! honestly, i see where you are coming from- you ask for your mom to NOT do something, and she does it anyway... thats tough... BUT, at the same time, i don't think your mom did this to spite you- she is happy for you and wants to celebrate it with everyone. the wedding isn't just about you and your FI, its about your two families coming together, too. be happy your mom is alive and well enough to do this for you. a lot of brides don't have that privledge, and you shouldn't take your mom for granted..... just be happy that you have people that want to celebrate this with you, and enjoy all your new stuff... things could definitely be a lot worse....
klingklang77
Posted:
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Re: i had my shower
Posted by amyg1033
wow, you sound really ungrateful. If people want to throw you a shower, the least you could do was appreciate the trouble they went to. Instead of complaining that it's like your 'mother's wedding,' just be happy that you have a mother that is alive to share this with you. I have a friend whose mother passed away and she would give anything to have her mother be there for her to throw her a shower and I'm sure there are a lot of brides out there that feel the same way.
maybe you should read what i wrote before. ii am thankful that i have family to do this for me. but when i wanted everything small and have said this many times and she just does things the way she wants it then it gets very frustrating. i feel it is very unfair for you to compare me to people that have had their moms pass. that is like comparing apples and oranges. i am really sorry that that is happening for your friend, but that isnt my situation and there was no need for youu to make a comment like that.
smara
Posted:
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Re: i had my shower
Posted by amyg1033
wow, you sound really ungrateful. If people want to throw you a shower, the least you could do was appreciate the trouble they went to. Instead of complaining that it's like your 'mother's wedding,' just be happy that you have a mother that is alive to share this with you. I have a friend whose mother passed away and she would give anything to have her mother be there for her to throw her a shower and I'm sure there are a lot of brides out there that feel the same way.
I wouldn't necessarily call you ungrateful, I feel it's a bit harsh, I can understand being upset cause its somethign you didnt want. But I can agree somewhat with 'Amyg1033'. My mother passed, I wish she was around and it's sad knowing that she will not be there.
I know its hard to see it this way, but I wish I had my mother around driving me crazy than not be around at all...
But in the end, make sure you do what makes you happy!!
hmpena
Posted:
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Re: i had my shower
I am so sorry that you hated it. Hopefully things will improve with your mom. I know you said you hate being the center of attention, but on your wedding day, you won't be the only person that will be focused on. Your FH will share the attention with you. It's a very different feeling on your wedding day than at your shower. I hated the attention I received at the shower and on my wedding day, I didn't notice everyone staring. Hopefully it will be like that for you as well.
Sweets14
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Re: i had my shower
You can't change it so i would just suck it up and try to forget about it. You made it through the day and it's over!!!!!
bournebride
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Re: i had my shower
I understand its tough and fustrating when you are asking a family member to be mindful of what you want for your day. The shower was for you not for her. I hope everything goes better.
Happybride2005
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Re: i had my shower
did u ask your mother why she did this when u asked her not too. don't let this come between you two
Brainy29
Posted:
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Re: i had my shower
I can understand you being upset with your mom after telling her you didn't want a shower. It's about the coming together of two families, but mostly about the coming together of the Bride and Groom and your family should not do anything you don't want them to do, it's all about you and FI and if you didn't want a shower then they should have honored your wishes. Sorry..
Beth1210
Posted:
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Re: i had my shower
But I can agree somewhat with 'Amyg1033'. My mother passed, I wish she was around and it's sad knowing that she will not be there.
I know its hard to see it this way, but I wish I had my mother around driving me crazy than not be around at all...
QUOTE]
I also lost my Mom- and I actually get upset when girls are on here complaining over and over again about there Moms- but I don't think you can compare that to this situation-
you asked her not too- that should have been enough
hsacks23r
Posted:
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Re: i had my shower
wow you had it early hope you had a great time
diluvchu
Posted:
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Re: i had my shower
Is it too late for you to pull out of the wedding. If all of this is making you unhappy, you should elope. The wedding is about you and your FH. Not about anybody else. If eloping is what would make you happy, you should do it. Sorry to hear you had a rough time at your shower.
nygirl77
Posted:
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Re: i had my shower
I am not looking forward to being the center of attention either - however, I am looking forward to the presents!!! I have requested no shower games though - unless it's a bridal bingo where I am not really involved, otherwise, please no games!
klingklang77
Posted:
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Re: i had my shower
i think i am just fed up with wedding stuff and i think the shower was just the icing on the cake. the situation is just getting so out of hand and me and my mother have to sit down and talk. i have felt that i have been guilt tripped into this whole wedding and that is how the shower happenned. i just feel that my mother doesnt understand that i am not a wedding-y person and when the topic came up of a shower, i said i would really prefer not to have one. then she said 'but you will get all those gifts' and 'it is tradition' etc. and next thing you know a shower is booked. the whole shower i was uncomfortable (i am an incredibly nervous person and i get panic attacks often), but when i talked to people today, they said i was fine. although i did have a little bit too much wine, but that didnt catch up to me until the end.
what i am going to is step back from this whole wedding stuff for a few weeks. i have so much going on with my situation and with FH not being here and i am just making myself crazy. i realise that i cannot cancel anything, my FHs family has their plane tickets booked from australia and if i were to do that, i dont think i would be starting out good with my future in laws; i still really really want to elope. but what i can do is scale this down and i really just need to talk with my mom and stand up for myself more. i think i just yes her and let her get what she wants more, that it all builds up until i explode. i am taking a break from this site as well and just letting the word wedding out of my head for a few weeks.
