I have been so sad lately (long)

Well ever since the wedding I have been up and down. My emotions have been on this roller coaster and I just need to tell you guys about it.

I think it is a mixture of things. Many things surrounding the wedding did not go right and I feel like I want to go back and fix it all. I was just so tired cause I did not sleep for a week.

Things at the wedding with the hall, and with other people just made the event really stressful. There were times I was really happy, but alot of the time things went wrong. FH and I almost got into a fight because we were being pulled everywhere.

After the honymoon I cried, alot. I know I can't do anything to fix those mistakes, and I should be happy about the things that went right, but it nags at me.

And with it over, it is like something is gone. I find myself still daydreaming about things to do for the wedding, then realize what I am doing. And it just makes me sad.

I thought that now that I have a job I would not thing about it anymore, but my job is really boring right now.

At work I decided to put up a pic on the desktop from my friends site and I just got upset (my DH neglected to cut his hair and last night I did and he look so good that all I could say was 'I can't believe you did not cut your hair for the wedding').

The odd thing is, I am normally not this picky or annoyed. It is just that this was supposed to be my BIG day, and I was so nice about things that I got trampled on, that now I just feel, I don't know...

I have to say that I am not even sure why I cry. I am afraid that I actually just did not enjoy the wedding like I thought I would. I swore if I was still upset with the hall after a month I would say something to them.

well, just wanted to talk.

Darcy, I am sorry your wedding wasn't all you dreamed it would be. Reality gets in the way and messes up our fantasies. But the whole point was that you married a wonderful man and are beginning a new life together. Feel better!

Oh Darcy I am sooo very sorry you are going through these feelings! It takes alot to come out and admit them and I give you ALOT of credit for doing so. If there is ANYTHING I can do, please let me know. We are all here for you!!

I am so sorry that you are not happy! Even though the day didn't go smoothly, you have a lifetime of happy memories to create that will put that one day to shame. Hang in there.

I hate to say this but I feel that this is not only about the wedding day...Being married is huge...maybe even a little overwhelming? Sit back, relax and realize that what's done is done.....you have your whole lives ahead of you together (scary I know) Don't be so hard on yourself. This is an emotional time....cry if you need to cry there is nothing wrong with that.

First of all

I have seen SO many posts on here by former brides that say similar things as you do. now that it's over, they're sad they have nothing to plan, look forward to, etc.

IMO, wedding planning is so consuming and we all have such huge expectations (naturally) that we feel let down if the tiniest of details goes wrong.

Please don't feel bad. I know that's easier said than done.

You have the rest of your life and marriage to look forward to. Maybe even a baby!

Anyhow, I just thought I would try and make you feel better

sorry Darcy!

Its important to convince yourself that its not the wedding but the marriage that matter the most

Sometimes, among all the details and drama we discuss on here , we all forget that little fact

hope it gets better for you

Oh Darcy- its so hard to have the day be as perfect as we all imagine. I feel for you right now. I think that we build it up so much that there is no way it could live up to our expectations. Especially when things go wrong that are beyond our control and you just want to go back and do it the way YOU wanted.

As for crying, I think you are just releasing all the pent up frustration and anxiety, plus the lack of sleep leading up to the big day. It will get easier with time- no wedding day is perfect. Just look over at your DH and remember why you went through it all. I know that it is hard when you just wanted everything to be perfect for that one day. I completely understand and I wish there were words to make you feel better.

I know I am going to be the SAME way! This happened to me w/ my engagement. But - this I know (and I am sure it will be the same for you) -

as the months go by, you will only be left with one feeling regarding your wedding day. I bet as the time keeps passing, that will wind up being a good feeling. You will think of only the good things that happened - and the best way to make sure this does happen - always talk about the good things. That is what I did with my engagement, and now, 9 months later - I only remember the good part! I don't know if I tricked myself into 'remembering' it a certain way, but whatever - it worked!

Right now there are prob. ten million thoughts in your head - what were the flowers like - what was his hair like - what did the people say - what did my dress look like...

After some time, you will forget the flowers, and the limo and the DJ and the food that was served AND the way your DH cut his hair!!!!!

You will only remember the overall picture, which was your beautiful DAY!!!

Congratulations and just be patient- it will all clear out of your head

I'm sorry that you are feeling sad. Getting married is very stressful and time consuming, and then it's over so quickly. I'm sure that you are upset that things didn't go exactly the way you wanted them. I'm worried about that too. Then I tell myself that the wedding is about the love you feel for your mate and how you want to spend the rest of your life with him. The rest of it is just stuff. Pretty stuff, don't get me wrong, but in the end it's your husband that you will look at each and every day. I know that not having everything perfect is annoying, but perfection is so hard to attain. Getting married is a life changing experience, you no longer are living for just yourself, you have that other person to think about. But like you posted, if you still feel that things went so badly wrong, get in touch with the hall, who knows maybe you will get some of the money that you dished out and you and the hubby can go some where for the weekend or buy something for your new place. I hope you feel better soon.

darcy i am so sorry you feel this way

i suppose all you can do now is take those memories and times you enjoyed at the wedding and hold onto them. just try to stay on the positive and enjoy your new marriage!

I feel like what you are going through is completely normal...I felt a little bit of this right after I got engaged...I had waited so long and dreamed about the proposal so many times that when it finally happened...I was thrilled, but then somewhat disappointed that the experience was over...no engagement to dream about because it already happened!

I am sure the same thing will happen to me after my wedding!



I feel your pain...you will be OK...focus on spending time with your DH!!!!

Sending some hugs your way. I am sorry you feel this way. You can help us plan
Just think of all the things you have to look forward to, being a wife!!!

I hope you feel better Darcy.

Darcy...I am so sorry that you are feeling a little upset. But I am hoping that once your pictures come in you will see all the special happy moments.

Oh, you poor thing This often happens when we have such high expectations. I'm sure this feeling will pass with time. Once you get your photographs and see how much you were enjoying yourself, you will only have good memories.

Can you put your energy into something else now. What about decorating your home with your DH to make a change?