Ok, so FH comes home today (he was away on business) and tells me that he was talking to guys in his BP and they're going to Miami for his bachelor party for a long weekend.
I would LOVE to do something like this. I'd love to go to Miami or Vegas or even Atlantic City. But even though I love the idea I could never tell/ask that of my girls because they don't have any money to do it...and only a few girls would be able to swing it. Our plan is to go out in NYC (I think?) for dinner and then go our partying.
His friends on the other hand all work on wall street and have money to burn. I really can't help but feel jealous about the whole thing. I know the most important part is to have your friends with you and celebrate - but I guess now that I see him doing something AWESOME and amazing I'm upset that I won't have the same experience. Don't get me wrong, I'll have a great time with my girls. I'm ecstatic about having them all in the same place at the same time!! But I'm definitely jealous.
Wow - I feel like such a selfish beyotch.
Snowflake08
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you're not selfish
FH is having a 'typical' bachelor party on the 19th I on the other hand, am having a 'cooking lesson' party that is supposed to be a surprise and I'm also 'jealous' that im not doing anything crazy
I'll go to AC with you bon bon!!!
beachbum05
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Posted by Snowflake08
I'll go to AC with you bon bon!!!
SWEET! Lets gamble and par-tay!!!!!
Espo22
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Posted by beachbum05
Posted by Snowflake08
I'll go to AC with you bon bon!!!
SWEET! Lets gamble and par-tay!!!!!
why dont you suggest AC...i mean one room lets say it is $300-something...if you split that between x amount of girls it comes out decent and around what you would spend in NYC anyways. I dont know how many girls it would be but it'd definitely be under $100 each for the room...do you think they'd be up for that
beachbum05
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Posted by Espo22
why dont you suggest AC...i mean one room lets say it is $300-something...if you split that between x amount of girls it comes out decent and around what you would spend in NYC anyways. I dont know how many girls it would be but it'd definitely be under $100 each for the room...do you think they'd be up for that
Maybe....? I dunno. I could ask them....but the ones who I think would be most unhappy about paying are from NY - so I think staying in NY where you dont have to pay for gas, tolls, etc is more appealing.
Its also tough b/c the girls invited to the BP are from ALL over. NC, Virginia, DC, Colorado, Los Angeles, Boston....I feel bad enough that they'll be paying for travel for shower, BP, and wedding...
I mean, I guess they'd have to travel regardless of where the BP is being held...but I dunno. I think NYC is the best option for everyone. Plus everyone can stay in my apartment for free (we'll be back in our apt. by then).
ETA: I also don't blame any of them if they can ONLY come to the wedding! These things get so expensive these days!
Espo22
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Posted by beachbum05
Posted by Espo22
why dont you suggest AC...i mean one room lets say it is $300-something...if you split that between x amount of girls it comes out decent and around what you would spend in NYC anyways. I dont know how many girls it would be but it'd definitely be under $100 each for the room...do you think they'd be up for that
Maybe....? I dunno. I could ask them....but the ones who I think would be most unhappy about paying are from NY - so I think staying in NY where you dont have to pay for gas, tolls, etc is more appealing.
Its also tough b/c the girls invited to the BP are from ALL over. NC, Virginia, DC, Colorado, Los Angeles, Boston....I feel bad enough that they'll be paying for travel for shower, BP, and wedding...
I mean, I guess they'd have to travel regardless of where the BP is being held...but I dunno. I think NYC is the best option for everyone. Plus everyone can stay in my apartment for free (we'll be back in our apt. by then).
ETA: I also don't blame any of them if they can ONLY come to the wedding! These things get so expensive these days!
oh yeah if they are from all over it is harder. Well NYC is one of the best party places so youll have an amazing time
PreshusSmurf
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I know how you feel ....
DH's Bachelor Party was overnight (2 full days) in Atlantic City.
My Bachelorette Party was planned to be a full day in NYC, it was all a surprise. I didn't feel like I could ask my girls to be away overnight -- 3 of them are married, 2 of which had little boys under the age of 2 years old. By the time for my Bachelorette Party came around, those 2 mommies were both expecting their 2nd!
In the end, because of my own physical circumstances, we just went out for a really good dinner with the girls. It was fun, and delicious, but not the same.
I am looking forward to the future -- the girls promised we'd reschedule the original plans and have a girls night out that we never got to have ... when I feel better & no one is pregnant! The timing doesn't matter really b/c its not like I was going to actually do anything differently before the wedding!
MikeandJess
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You are not a biatch! I completely understand your jealousy, FH's friends have a lot more money then my friends so I'm sure his bachelor party will be a lot more extravagant then mine will be. Not to mention that when it comes to bachelor parties, FH's friends are seasoned veterans while my bachelorette party will be the first ever that my friends are planning.
I don't know anyone that wouldn't feel like you do, it's human nature and it's normal. You can't pick and choose what you're going to be jealous of, it's a natural reaction. This doesn't make you a terrible person and it certainly doesn't make you a 'biatch', it just means you're a normal person with normal feelings, don't beat yourself up over it
Julybride08
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Posted by beachbum05
Ok, so FH comes home today (he was away on business) and tells me that he was talking to guys in his BP and they're going to Miami for his bachelor party for a long weekend.
I would LOVE to do something like this. I'd love to go to Miami or Vegas or even Atlantic City. But even though I love the idea I could never tell/ask that of my girls because they don't have any money to do it...and only a few girls would be able to swing it. Our plan is to go out in NYC (I think?) for dinner and then go our partying.
His friends on the other hand all work on wall street and have money to burn. I really can't help but feel jealous about the whole thing. I know the most important part is to have your friends with you and celebrate - but I guess now that I see him doing something AWESOME and amazing I'm upset that I won't have the same experience. Don't get me wrong, I'll have a great time with my girls. I'm ecstatic about having them all in the same place at the same time!! But I'm definitely jealous.
Wow - I feel like such a selfish beyotch.
Your not selfish at all. I wanted to do the samr thing but I know none of my girls have the money and all. So I know how you feel.
yelley77
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It's natural to be jealous. When I found out my FH was going to Vegas, I was upset that he was getting 4 days of celebration and i was only thinking about a night out in the city.
The more I thought about it, the more I was ok with it.... No matter WHERE I end up, I'll be with my girls and we will have a blast, whether it is for one day, or 4 days.
What you are feeling is totally normal, IMO, but just think, you guys will probably cause more trouble and have more fun on your one day thing than those boys could ever do/have in 4!!!!
Mici n KC
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It's very understandable and you're not selfish. I'd be jealous too!
I don't know what FH will be doing, but we will be doing it on the same night in the same city, just not together. 3 of my BMs are from OOT and they are my closest friends. Just having them come to spend time with me is great since I don't get to see them that much.
You'll have an amazing bachlorette party! Don't worry! We live in the best city in the world!
Mizzdimple
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FH feels like this about my bachelorette party.....we are going to vegas....and he is jealous!!! i feel bad for him though...but his brothers are just not stepping up and organizing anything to that degree.
As for me....only 1 person out of my bridal party is coming with me to Vegas......one of my bridesmaids..everyone else is too broke....i just invited a bunch of other girls to come lol...just...through it out there.......see what happens if not.....you will have a great time anywhere.
Belongs2DanBuckley
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No Bonnie I agree with everyone on here. I dont' think you're being selfish! I would TOTALLY be pissed if FH got to go somewhere and I didn't Honestly though, NYC is DOPE!!!! That's WHY I don't want to go anywhere else....where else could you go and see a drag show, get a 4 star dinner, go see gorgeous guys dancing on stage for you and go to one of the top clubs in the country all in one night and still be home for breakfast? Seriously, we have one of the greatest cities in the world in our backyards!!! FCK AC!!!! FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK MIAMI LOL- GIVE ME NYC ANYDAY!!! I've been to southbeach! Its awesome, don't get me wrong, but give me NYC any day! Especially for a night like that!
mandag
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Bonnie,
I think SO many of us are in the same situation. FH's GM all have money and they are going to Miami, too. I'm staying in NYC with my girls...they don't make as much money, and some of them are flying in from out of town as it is, we're doing a joint shower/bachelorette weekend.
Doesn't this say something about inequality in men vs. women's salaries???? That SO MANY of us are in the same situation. Grrrrrrr.
We'll have fun though - and you're right - SO MUCH of the wedding is about US, that I guess if they want to go away with the guys, so be it...
KellNMike
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I feel the same exact way. My FH is away right now in Las Vegas and I am bitter, sadly. My girls can't afford to do anything like that either. And the reason that I'm really bitter is because I don't think that either of us can either. He bought an agreed upon amount, and this morning I looked on our online bank info. and saw that he tried to take out money yesterday!! I am pissed.
DnellD809
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Who wouldn't want to go off and do something fun and exciting for a weekend when you know FH is doing the same thing? It's only natural I think and ur not being selfish! Maybe you could bring something up to 1 of ur BM who you know you could talk to and that way she could work it out with all of the girls! I'm sure there is something they could all pull together that everyone could afford and have a blast!
beachbum05
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WOW!!!
You guys seriously rock! Wow! I'm so so so surprised so many of you have the same situation.
And you're all 100% right. Sometimes I FORGET that NYC is the best city in the world. I take it for granted. Sooo many people from other places COME to NY for THEIR BPs.
We'll have a great time. I have no doubt
But thank you all for taking the time to respond to me. I'm touched.
SoontobeMrsMc
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Posted by beachbum05
Ok, so FH comes home today (he was away on business) and tells me that he was talking to guys in his BP and they're going to Miami for his bachelor party for a long weekend.
I would LOVE to do something like this. I'd love to go to Miami or Vegas or even Atlantic City. But even though I love the idea I could never tell/ask that of my girls because they don't have any money to do it...and only a few girls would be able to swing it. Our plan is to go out in NYC (I think?) for dinner and then go our partying.
His friends on the other hand all work on wall street and have money to burn. I really can't help but feel jealous about the whole thing. I know the most important part is to have your friends with you and celebrate - but I guess now that I see him doing something AWESOME and amazing I'm upset that I won't have the same experience. Don't get me wrong, I'll have a great time with my girls. I'm ecstatic about having them all in the same place at the same time!! But I'm definitely jealous.
Wow - I feel like such a selfish beyotch.
Aww! I feel the EXACT same way. But I was afraid to say it aloud! FH is going to Vegas for 5 days for his Bach Party. I would LOVE to do the same -maybe somewhere warm for a few days BUT I know that my BP girls will not be able to afford it. I am so happy to have the girls together for dinner and drinks and whatever else the night brings but I can't help but be a tad jealous that we can't go away for a mini vacation like the guys are!
I feel your pain! lol
Eternalyyourz
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aww I understand why you would want to be able to do something similar to what he is doing!
TrueLoveIn2008
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Bon, I'm in the same boat. FH wants to go to Colorado for his, and I will probably just go out on LI or in NYC. I would love a little weekend somewhere - maybe a night at Mohegan? - but that's the extent of my grandiose thoughts. I am wayyyy too practical to even WANT my girls will take me to FLA or Vegas. But it's the company that matters and you will have a BLAST.
