I know I'm being petty but

this morning I found out my MOH/sister might lose her very well paid job, and not because she did anything wrong to get herself fired, but because she wants to be a stay at home mom. Not that there is anything wrong with that, but her hubby is not the most responsible human on the planet (he managed to get himself fired 6 months into a really well paying job), his salary alone will not pay for their house, the baby, the bills etc. My sister is a chemist, with a Class A education. She has multiple degrees, and after our 70 year old arthritic mother agreed to watch the baby so she wouldn't lose this job, she is now going to throw it all away and go back to being a waitress. (For those of you out there that are waitresses, or have been, this is not a put-down or an insult, but my sister graduated summa cum laude in forensic science, and is currently in charge of an entire lab at a pharmecutical company - she oversees all production, and has been for more than 5 years.)

What bugs me about all this, (and this is the petty part) besides her not using her hard earned education and relying on that lazy bum of a husband, is what she is now going to say she can't afford for the wedding - like the dress, the shoes, the hair, the makeup etc. When she got married I bought her one of the more expensive items on her registry as a shower gift (@ $500), another $100 shower gift, threw the shower ($1000), and then for the wedding I bought her an excursion for her honeymoon and paid a huge fine and did some legal work to her her hubby's drivers license reinstated. (not to mention the baby shower gift, and baby shower, and christening outfit - all since I got engaged, amounting to over $1000) She is barely interested in the wedding as it is, and now with the financial mess she about to put herself in, I can just see her backing out at her hubby's insistance b/c they can't afford it.
I had kind of sort of expected her to reciprocate with my wedding.

Okay, done being petty now.

don't beat yourself up for being human Darlene. it's only natural to kind of expect quid pro quo, especially when the means are at the other persons fingertips. up until this point, your sister had the means to reciprocate, so the expectation was natural. if it had been this way from the begininng, I am sure you would have known what (not) to expect off the bat.

I am sorry that you are going through this. hopefully she will see the error of her ways. sounds like the hubby would be a better candidate to stay at home (at least financially)

good luck to your and your family.

I really don't know what to say, except you're not being petty. You have a right to your feelings. I just wanted to offer you a bunch of

I don't think you are being petty at all- I think you are just concerned for your sister- she seems like a bright girl who made a lot of scarafices to get where she is in her career- and now she is throwing it all away- you are just concerned that she is not going to be able to feed her baby or have a roof over their heads

have you spoken to her about it?