At the church (my church has some of the dumbest rules EVER) My flower girl is to little. We bought a red wagon covered it in Satin and tulle and having my ring berar pull her down! i didnt ask because I was afraid I already knew the answer NO... im sure they'd say no. That day im just going to let it happen what are they gonna do right? not marry me?
we bought Bubbles and big party poppers I didnt ask about the party poppers cause I am sure they'd tell me they make to much of a mess and that I can't use them. the wedding is over what are they gonna do right?
my Dj wants 27.00 for a dozen glow necklaces Oriental trading has them 50 for 44.95 If I order them and hand them out half way through the wedding what are they gonna do stop playing?
dm24angel
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Re: I mean really what can they do right???
LOL...good luck...I'd be careful with the church though it sounds like no big deal really.....I know at our church they warned us about the off the shoulder thing and they said' If you try to come in and are wearing a strapless dress or BM's do and think we wont say anything on your wedding day, you will be surprised, you will have to have your BM's put on tuxedo jackets and you wear a long green shawl we created just for this purpose' ....so we are being really careful with our church...I would be mortified if they said something mean or whatnot....
I have been to weddings where if a picture(flash) was taken during the ceremony the priest freaked and was very mad and it just causes such a damper on the mood..thats what Id be worried about....
as far as the DJ...I dount they can say or do anything , you can hand out whatever you like
chris605
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Re: I mean really what can they do right???
Becareful with the church - My friend was told not to use bubbles and she did anyway and they fined her $500 - YEP $500 bucks - They tried to tell her it ruined the door - WHATEVER...
jannshari
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Re: I mean really what can they do right???
If this is your family church, I would be very careful about what you do. Frankly, even if it isn't, I would still be careful.
The rules may seem silly to you, but I find it a little disrespectful that you are going to do what you want without even asking if it's OK because you don't want to hear the word 'no.'
OSCARtheGROOM
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Re: I mean really what can they do right???
I would becareful with the church. They can do alot more than you think. They're not the richest and most powerfull organization in the world for nothing! Good Luck.
june262004
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Re: I mean really what can they do right???
i think my 620.00 donation should cover all of this really. they told us the flower girl can not throw petals. They made all of our vendors including limo driver sign papers about where they aren't alowed to stand in certain places in the church and our limo driver is not allowed to have any alchol in the limo before if they see it in the limo they wont marry us. The 20.00 tip for the alter boys has to be 10.00 in cash the music minister has to be paid in cash. no roses no balloons no doves no rice no birdseed no flowers on the alter no pew bows no no no.....
butterfly20
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Re: I mean really what can they do right???
i think that the dj probably wouldnt mind handing out the favors you get elswehere
nehaliasz
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Re: I mean really what can they do right???
our priest actually told us all of the restrictions about no flower petas and stuff, and then he said, 'if you do it, there's nothing we can do about it after the fact, but I didn't tell you that'. I probably still won't do the petals, but I thought it was funny that the priest thought it was ridiculous as well.
Mishu
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Re: I mean really what can they do right???
June242004
Where the heck are you getting married...the vatican!!!
kissy27
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Re: I mean really what can they do right???
Posted by june262004
i think my 620.00 donation should cover all of this really. they told us the flower girl can not throw petals. They made all of our vendors including limo driver sign papers about where they aren't alowed to stand in certain places in the church and our limo driver is not allowed to have any alchol in the limo before if they see it in the limo they wont marry us. The 20.00 tip for the alter boys has to be 10.00 in cash the music minister has to be paid in cash. no roses no balloons no doves no rice no birdseed no flowers on the alter no pew bows no no no.....
You already know I am getting married at the same church....They told us & in the bbok that we are able to throw birdseed or rice....It is in the handbook that was given when we booked...You are allowed pew bows but they can not be taped or stapled to the pew....I know about the alcohol thing, but they are not going to actually check the cars...The only place that we were told that the photographer & limo drivers can't stand is the sancutary...Other then that it is free game...Did they just tell you all this stuff recently??
Maribelle7777
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Re: I mean really what can they do right???
The DJ's wont care.
Don't know what the Church will say, if anything.
Go for it, like you said they can't stop it.
FLaCaTaCa
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Re: I mean really what can they do right???
Wow! You're brave! I wouldn't do it but that is really because this is my parish for so many years. They have seen my family and I every Sunday for all my life. I think they would just die if I went against anything they asked me not to do. You know what? I am not even sure they have restrictions....I hope they don't!!!!!
Good Luck and Be Careful....you don't want them to look at the wagon and stop the service. If they are as strict as they sound...I wouldn't be surprised if they did.
BMD'sPeanut
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Re: I mean really what can they do right???
Posted by jannshari
If this is your family church, I would be very careful about what you do. Frankly, even if it isn't, I would still be careful.
The rules may seem silly to you, but I find it a little disrespectful that you are going to do what you want without even asking if it's OK because you don't want to hear the word 'no.'
I agree...
As for the DJ--tell them straight out (show them the catalog even) taht you can get those things cheaper...Have a friend hand them out if the DJ refuses.
LADYLUV69
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Re: I mean really what can they do right???
did you not know all these things before you decided to use the church. if you did shame on you and if you didn't shame on the church. too many restrictions on your day of happiness. who is performing the ceremony THE POPE!!!
Salason626
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Re: I mean really what can they do right???
Did everyone ask what the rules are??? I wasnt told any (except for the pew bow thing) and am not asking...should i be?
070502
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Re: I mean really what can they do right???
That is the exact reason I don't like St. James. I attended school there until it regionlized in 1996 (I was entering 8th grade when it closed so Fr. Dan could have his new church), my brother graduated from there in 1988. We both were baptized, made communion, confirmation all at St. James and was a member of the children's choir back in the day.
So, you would think when I walked in there all newly engaged to pick a date they would have helped me out. NOPE, not at all.
There problem with me was that my fiance (now DH) was active duty and couldn't come with me to pick the date. I informed them that we were already signed up for Precana but that Joe was unable to get leave just to come and pick a date with me but they were free to call him and confirm.
I spoke to the Priest who I forget his name but he was the latest one to recently have to leave the priesthood. I started crying because it was bad enough I didn't get to graduate from there but I really wanted to get married there. The priest didn't care and said he couldn't even pencil us in and on top of that we needed to start getting the rest of our vendors so we needed a concrete date! I even offerred my donation upfront to hold the date they said they couldn't do it until they met my fiance and could confirm we were engaged.
Long Story short I called St. Kilian's and met one of the greatest priest's I have ever known and St. James lost 4 long standing members of its parish.
I don't get what St. James problem is, but that any church that made me cry as I was trying to do the right thing and pick a date with them first but wouldn't allow me because my fiancee was serving his country wasen't where I wanted to get married.
Be very careful with crossing them! They need to make back every penny they spent when they lost all there old parishioners.
070502
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Re: I mean really what can they do right???
Posted by Salason626
Did everyone ask what the rules are??? I wasnt told any (except for the pew bow thing) and am not asking...should i be?
We got a booklet from St. Kilians and our priest told us that if it wasen't in the book and if I wanted to do it to not just not ask and play dumb but not to show up innapropriate.
2003fallwedding
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Re: I mean really what can they do right???
WOW, I can't believe all these restrictions at your churches.....a bride or BM can not have a strapless dress??? are you kidding me???
I picked my date over the phone...and my donation was $250 to church and we had DH's uncle who is a priest perform the mass and $200 for music
The only thing I could not have was bird seed or rose petals....My church is more modern and very easy going..
ChristineC68
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Re: I mean really what can they do right???
Regardless of how strict the rules are, they are the rules for you to have the ceremony at this church you chose.
I think you are just asking for headaches on your wedding day by trying to slip by with all these 'what can they do' ideas.
What if they tell your flower girl all excited in her little dress that won't be able to walk up the aisle that she cant go in the wagon?
What if they decide to fine you for using the bubbles?
Is having a crying baby during your ceremony or an extra expense really worth it?
As for the DJ, I would just tell them that you will provide favors for them to distribute. Our florist was very open to finding ways to help us save money.
sophie78
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Re: I mean really what can they do right???
I think you have to be careful and here is why....
My family owns a winery out east. They charge a site fee of $3500. A couple came and told them that they wanted to have a small party of about 30 people. They felt that such a small shouldn't warrant paying a site fee. My family, because they are so nice, told them ok. They just had to buy the wine and pay a small fee per head.
Well...they got a call a couple of weeks ago. Only one month before the party. The woman said that she needed a changing room. When they questioned her further, they found out that the woman was getting married at the party!!!! She needed to change into her dress, and she has a priest showing up for the ceremony. They imagine that she will also want to decorate and have dancing. THIS IS SO WRONG!! She tried to stiff them out of the fee.
So what's the result. She saved $3500. But no one is going to go out of their way to help her.
