I need love and help

So some of you may notice I haven't been on in a while. I am so sad. I am not going to go into a long story - but basically the end line is that my fiancee's parents have pulled out of the wedding financially, emotionally, and phsyically (We will be $12K out).

So now my question is - do I continue with the wedding and downsize on a lot of stuff? Or do I put off the wedding and lose almost $10K in deposits?

My parents are concerned it will not be a 'happy' wedding. His parents do not like me. He has finally 'grown' up and they think I am the one putting things in his head. So really I do not know what to do.

Well short story:

He has a daughter - he used to live at home - he left home to move in with me - still does his duties as a father (no custody) - we decided to move to another place that is 15 minutes further away - but we got a bigger place FOR his daughter and as a new start for us - and his parents feel I am purposely pulling him further away from his daughter - everything is my fault and no one acknowledges that he is now making decisions for himself that INCLUDE his daughter.


Ugh (sniff sniff)

Christina

I'm so sorry to hear about what you are going through. At least your FH is on your side.

Personally I would hate to lose all that deposit money. I would probably do the wedding now and just scale things back.

And don't let those awful people ruin your day!

Much hugs!

I agree with the other ladies...You have to do what is good for FH and yourself...and his daughter. Forget about what everyone else says, that is not important. If his family does not want to join in his happiness then it is their loss. Go on with the wedding, just keep it simple!
Good Luck

Christina, if you both feel that you love one another and love can go so much further.... i would see if you can get a loan out and continue with your plans. I would do that if the two of you WANT and are IN LOVE with one another...


I would not put off the wedding bc of his parents. YOU know him the best and remember that.

Many hugs and wishes for the two of you to wed this year.

ps the money you get back from the wedding you can pay your loan back.... relax take a deep breathe and begin your life with him this year.

dont call off the wedding your only giving his parents what they want..which is u out the picture, down size your wedding just a little to what you can afford as long as on the day of august 13th you and fh are hand to hand saying i do who cares.......

christina i am so sorry that you have to deal with this- you do something nice and you get slack for it...figures! im so sorry that his family is being so difficult- it soulds like you are trying to help things
and they should be acknowledging that...
i dont think its a personal vendetta against you- any girl that moves their precious son away from them they would have the same feelings about so try not to take it personal

as for pulling out....if you and fh are ready to front some money on your own then go for it..otherwise, try to budget as best as you can..
there are way to cut corners...a wedding is never cheap and it will cost you, but you can find ways to make the parents lack of contribution feel less significant

though i will say that although these huge big weddings are great, ive been to some small 30 people weddings that was been amazingly intimate and special...and that there is nothing wrong with a smaller wedding and losing some deposits if in the long run it saves you some from going into debt keeping up with the big wedding that was orginally planned

sending big hugs your way

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Posted by Preshy7

christina i am so sorry that you have to deal with this- you do something nice and you get slack for it...figures! im so sorry that his family is being so difficult- it soulds like you are trying to help things
and they should be acknowledging that...
i dont think its a personal vendetta against you- any girl that moves their precious son away from them they would have the same feelings about so try not to take it personal

as for pulling out....if you and fh are ready to front some money on your own then go for it..otherwise, try to budget as best as you can..
there are way to cut corners...a wedding is never cheap and it will cost you, but you can find ways to make the parents lack of contribution feel less significant

though i will say that although these huge big weddings are great, ive been to some small 30 people weddings that was been amazingly intimate and special...and that there is nothing wrong with a smaller wedding and losing some deposits if in the long run it saves you some from going into debt keeping up with the big wedding that was orginally planned

sending big hugs your way

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I agree with you 100% Small weddings can be beautiful and I don't think anyone should put themselves too deeply in debt to have a big wedding. I'm so sorry his parents are giving you such grief.

I agree with everyone else, dont cancel the wedding ,try and scale down what you can and marry the man you love

Thinking happy thoughts for you. Good luck with whatever you do!

I am so sorry you are going through this. I know first hand how this feels and how close minded FIL's can be. For some reason some 'parents' do not want their kids to grow up or be in a better place and they grow to resent the people in their kids lives who truely love and support their kid. I am going through something similar w/ FH's parents and understand completely the hurt and frustration you are going through. Just continue to love and support your FH...that's all yo can do. His parents will lose out more in the end tby being cruel then you guys ever will. Again, I am truely sorry you are going through this. No one deserves it. If you need to talk, feel free to FM me.