i need some advice

christine2010 Posted: Nov 12, 2009 10:26 AM

i need some advice

thank you

AngnShaun Posted: Nov 12, 2009 10:28 AM

Re: i need some advice

i guess it would depend on who that person was in my life... and what that the thing i found out was... how serious it was... and if either one would benefit from it being said

meganbrandon Posted: Nov 12, 2009 10:29 AM

Re: i need some advice

i think it depends on the situation...
is it something medical or relationship or what kind of category is it in?

MikesBride2B Posted: Nov 12, 2009 10:29 AM

Re: i need some advice

Posted by AngnShaun

i guess it would depend on who that person was in my life... and what that the thing i found out was... how serious it was... and if either one would benefit from it being said

This...if you want you can FM me the problem and I can give you more candid advice...

2010BTB Posted: Nov 12, 2009 10:29 AM

Re: i need some advice

Every circumstance is different. There's a couple things I think. Are you absolutely positive this would ruin your relationship with the person? Is your relationship with this person vital to your happiness? If it is and they feel the same about you...I don't see what can't be worked out. Lastly, what's more important to you - your sanity (as you've been saying it's eating you up) or your relationship with this person?

MarjorieFrank Posted: Nov 12, 2009 10:29 AM

Re: i need some advice

It depends on your relationship with the person.

I found out that FSIL's boyfriend was a rapist/wifebeater/convict/frequent prisoner and I had no problem telling everyone because I could care less about him and I didn't want to have a relationship with him in my life at all.

If it will permenantly ruin your relationship with this person for life and you don't think it can ever be repaired then I wouldn't say anything. However, I think eventually in time all bad feelings will eventually disappear. If you think it is worth it for somoene to know the truth, personally I may consider doing it. I think you would be able to repair the relationship in time.

Can you try talking to someone you trust and asking them for advice? Also, maybe telling one other person will let you feel a little less eaten up.
Good Luck!

Jna2010 Posted: Nov 12, 2009 10:29 AM

Re: i need some advice

if that something i knew was hurting them or me or anyone i loved, yes i would confront them, yes it may put a strain on things for a while but honestly i would want to protect those i love and care about first and i dont think id be able to keep it to myself otherwise if it was hurting those i love

elisa112101 Posted: Nov 12, 2009 10:31 AM

Re: i need some advice

ok well without all the details... the secret you know... is it dangerous NOT to tell? by talking to this person what are you going to acheve(other then maybe losing this person in your life?) i wish i could be more help to you but, if its eating at you it must be BIG, it may be hard but i would probably NOT tell( but im a chicken) GL to you!!

emc282rjm Posted: Nov 12, 2009 10:31 AM

Re: i need some advice

Can confronting them resolve anything? Or will it just make things worse? If it will just make things worse, I say leave it, but if you think you can fix it, then I would resolve it.

If you want, you can FM me and I'll give you more specific advice!

AngnShaun Posted: Nov 12, 2009 10:33 AM

Re: i need some advice

Posted by MikesBride2B

Posted by AngnShaun

i guess it would depend on who that person was in my life... and what that the thing i found out was... how serious it was... and if either one would benefit from it being said

This...if you want you can FM me the problem and I can give you more candid advice...

yeah... without all the details its difficult to give specific advice

GiannisWifey Posted: Nov 12, 2009 10:44 AM

Re: i need some advice

Posted by Jna2010

if that something i knew was hurting them or me or anyone i loved, yes i would confront them, yes it may put a strain on things for a while but honestly i would want to protect those i love and care about first and i dont think id be able to keep it to myself otherwise if it was hurting those i love

ITA. If this something was putting anyone that I love in pain or potential harm, I would DEF say something. I would never want to keep something inside that I know could wind up hurting myself or those I love more in the end by them NOT knowing.

grkbarbie Posted: Nov 12, 2009 10:46 AM

Re: i need some advice

it reallly depends on the situation

jcreilly Posted: Nov 12, 2009 10:52 AM

Re: i need some advice

Posted by MikesBride2B

Posted by AngnShaun

i guess it would depend on who that person was in my life... and what that the thing i found out was... how serious it was... and if either one would benefit from it being said

This...if you want you can FM me the problem and I can give you more candid advice...

i agree