I need some help here! Mostly, opinions!

This is my 2nd marriage and I have a 6 year old daughter. She has known my FH and since she was 2. She is very close with him and loves him a lot. He cares for her as if she was his own. I want to make our wedding day special for her as well but don't really know how to do so tactifully-

I want to get her a piece of jewlery to give her at the ceremony to represent that we are all now a family (my ex is still very much in her life so I don't want to take that away from her even though he and I are NOT on good terms). My DD asked if she could change her name to my new one and I told her the reasons why (as much as you can explain to a 6 yr old). Any ideas on how to make her a part of the ceremony? If so- jewlery? what kind? A ring she would out grow.

Also, what do you think of having something special at the reception for her- a dance with my FH? tacky? I have no idea....

so I come to you and ask that you be honest and give opinions= I can take creative criticism if intentions are true. Also, I'd be interested in hearing what you may have seen/heard about a situation like mine.

TIA!

I think it's beautiful you want to include her. It's not just you and FH joining together, it's your whole family becoming one, and I don't think there is anything tacky about it.

I suggest that she can help with the unity candle at the ceremony. She should get one of her own to light, or help you hold yours.

Including her in the dance is also a great thing. They can have one of their own, or you can bring her in for the 2nd half of your dance.

Presenting her with something at the ceremony would be lovely. Perhaps after you and FH exchange rings, he can give her a necklace to wear. I think if I saw this, I would probably start to cry and think it was just heartwarming and lovely.

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Posted by 2ndstar

This is my 2nd marriage and I have a 6 year old daughter. She has known my FH and since she was 2. She is very close with him and loves him a lot. He cares for her as if she was his own. I want to make our wedding day special for her as well but don't really know how to do so tactifully-

I want to get her a piece of jewlery to give her at the ceremony to represent that we are all now a family (my ex is still very much in her life so I don't want to take that away from her even though he and I are NOT on good terms). My DD asked if she could change her name to my new one and I told her the reasons why (as much as you can explain to a 6 yr old). Any ideas on how to make her a part of the ceremony? If so- jewlery? what kind? A ring she would out grow.

Also, what do you think of having something special at the reception for her- a dance with my FH? tacky? I have no idea....

so I come to you and ask that you be honest and give opinions= I can take creative criticism if intentions are true. Also, I'd be interested in hearing what you may have seen/heard about a situation like mine.

TIA!

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Just reading this makes me want to cry because I am in the same situation. I have a 7 year old daughter and my FH has been in her life since she was 3 years old. Her biological father is a part of her life, but she has a very special bond with my FH. I think the dance is a wonderful idea (maybe He Didn't Have To Be - Brad Paisley, The Temptations - My Girl or Because You Loved Me - Celine Dion)

I went to my co-worker's wedding and she has a son from a previous marriage. Her, her husband, and her son did the unity sand ceremony with 3 different colors into one jar which represented their combined family. It was really a beautiful thing.

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Posted by TheLadyJ

I think it's beautiful you want to include her. It's not just you and FH joining together, it's your whole family becoming one, and I don't think there is anything tacky about it.

I suggest that she can help with the unity candle at the ceremony. She should get one of her own to light, or help you hold yours.

Including her in the dance is also a great thing. They can have one of their own, or you can bring her in for the 2nd half of your dance.

Presenting her with something at the ceremony would be lovely. Perhaps after you and FH exchange rings, he can give her a necklace to wear. I think if I saw this, I would probably start to cry and think it was just heartwarming and lovely.

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This!

Crashing - Hi. I was on the filp side - My DH has 2 sons, and I wanted to make them part of the ceremony. Before we said our vows to each other, I said my 'vows' to the boys - about always loving their dad, helping him be the best dad he can be, being lucky to be a part of their lives and to always be there for them. Then I gave them each a 'blended family' pin as a symbol of our new family (and their mother is still a big part of their lives - I wasn't trying to take her place, just another person to love and support them). Here's one site that has the pins and the same thing as a necklace. If you google 'blended family weddings' you'll get lots of ideas. Good luck!

http://www.theweddingoutlet.com/Wedding-Ceremony/Blended-Family

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Posted by 2ndstar

This is my 2nd marriage and I have a 6 year old daughter. She has known my FH and since she was 2. She is very close with him and loves him a lot. He cares for her as if she was his own. I want to make our wedding day special for her as well but don't really know how to do so tactifully-

I want to get her a piece of jewlery to give her at the ceremony to represent that we are all now a family (my ex is still very much in her life so I don't want to take that away from her even though he and I are NOT on good terms). My DD asked if she could change her name to my new one and I told her the reasons why (as much as you can explain to a 6 yr old). Any ideas on how to make her a part of the ceremony? If so- jewlery? what kind? A ring she would out grow.

Also, what do you think of having something special at the reception for her- a dance with my FH? tacky? I have no idea....

so I come to you and ask that you be honest and give opinions= I can take creative criticism if intentions are true. Also, I'd be interested in hearing what you may have seen/heard about a situation like mine.

TIA!

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My sister got married in 2006 and had a 9 yr old son from a previous relationship. She also had a 2 yr son with the groom. What they did was presented both boys with some kind of necklace to solidfy them as a family of four. My sister's ex was at the wedding and was completely ok with it. Also, my BFF married a man this past Nov who has a 5 yr daughter from his first marriage. My friend also went with a necklace and pledged her love and devotion in special vows to her step-daughter that had the entire place in tears bc of how beautiful it was. I also think the dance would be really nice as well.

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Posted by chilly313

Crashing - Hi. I was on the filp side - My DH has 2 sons, and I wanted to make them part of the ceremony. Before we said our vows to each other, I said my 'vows' to the boys - about always loving their dad, helping him be the best dad he can be, being lucky to be a part of their lives and to always be there for them. Then I gave them each a 'blended family' pin as a symbol of our new family (and their mother is still a big part of their lives - I wasn't trying to take her place, just another person to love and support them). Here's one site that has the pins and the same thing as a necklace. If you google 'blended family weddings' you'll get lots of ideas. Good luck!

http://www.theweddingoutlet.com/Wedding-Ceremony/Blended-Family

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My Aunt did this at her second wedding and it was beautiful!

WOW! I can't thank everyone enough for your posts. Such great ideas and thank you for being so supportive! I am tearing up just thinking about our ceremony and DD/FH dance. LOVE the you got a friend in me suggestion! I will cry! The sand is such a beautiful touch and I am going to look up the blended family pin and links. THANK YOU AGAIN!

PS- keep the suggestions coming! You ladies are fab!

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Posted by MrsHeffToBe

One of my co-workers just told me that at a wedding she attended the stepfather and daughter danced to 'You've Got a Friend In Me' from Toy Story. I think that is so cute and very age appropriate!

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I also really like the sand ceremony idea and the necklace. That is something she can grow into. Maybe get it with a little charm or something that is special to you all. Or speaking of charms.. maybe a charm bracelet could be another jewelry idea and you and FH could pick out that charms for the bracelet.

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Posted by MrsHeffToBe

One of my co-workers just told me that at a wedding she attended the stepfather and daughter danced to 'You've Got a Friend In Me' from Toy Story. I think that is so cute and very age appropriate!

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This sounds perfect! And I think a necklace exchange would be so thoughtful. It is very sweet, not tacky at all.

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Posted by MrsHeffToBe

One of my co-workers just told me that at a wedding she attended the stepfather and daughter danced to 'You've Got a Friend In Me' from Toy Story. I think that is so cute and very age appropriate!

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This sounds awesome and loving the sand idea too!!

Love the Toy Story Song/Dance idea. That makes me feel like crying. A first dance with all 3 of you would be so nice as a new family. sand/candle ceremony would be nice too.

If she could be like your maid of honor and stand by your side or walk you down the aisle that would be just so sweet as well.

Oh a charm bracelet too like what was mentioned before! Get charms with meaning or a small note she can keep forever.

I'm doing this for my flowergirls with pandora ones.

I think I forgot to mention that my DD will be my flowergirl. My FH's niece (1 year older than my DD) will also be a FG but my DD will have a little something extra (flowers, a mini tiara etc) that will make her stand out more.

The song suggestion by Rascal Flats is a great one too! Thanks!