So FH and I got on the topic of hunting.. (I do not like hunting) and he does (he doesn't hunt just for fun or sport. when they hunt they do use the meat or would donate it so its not like he just wants to go kill deer)... but anyway.. he has gone hunting since he was younger but hasnt gone in years... I'd prefer that he doesnt go at all but I would never ask him to change things he has always done. Anyway... he was saying how when we get a house he wants to display the head of his first buck and I was like WHAT?!?!?! I said in the nicest way possible that I do not want any animal heads in my home and I don't want a dead animal brought home either. I will not ever eat deer meat but he loves it. So I said if you shoot a deer you can do what u have to do with it away from our house and keep it to yourself.. He was insisting that it is ok to display the head and that there is nothing wrong with doing so and I think its disgusting. We are both entitled to our opinions and we wont see eye to eye or agree on this. I dont want it and he does..To hunt is one thing but why do u need to mount its head for decoration or have it as a trophy? Its not a picture frame its an animal that was once living..
My question is... am I wrong for telling him that I refuse to have animal heads in my home (which would obviously be his home also)??
Im trying to see his point which is that hes always wanted to do this for some reason but I cant even deal with the idea of it.. it makes me want to vomit and I get so upset just thinking about it.
**Just want to add that I by no means at all have any issues toward anyone who hunts or has family or friends who hunt**
My main thing here is how do I get him to understand that I can't deal with an animal head in my home? And am I being unfair?
Its a very hard thing to try to compromise on...Im trying to be a good understanding FW but this topic is way too upsetting for me..
Please give me your advice..
Thanks ladies love you! <3
Sorry so long and please don't quote this.
FutureMrsGTL
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Re: I need some help ladies...
Crashing..
I don't like hunting either... it really really upsets me! so I don't think you're wrong at all! theres no way there would ever be any animal head hanging from any of my walls and its clearly something that makes you uncomfortable and if it makes you uncomfortable then it shouldn't be in your home.
Hope it all works out
bubblichik
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Re: I need some help ladies...
I do not think you are wrong at all. Each and everyone of us has to respect the rights and feelings of our significant others and in this case you both feel strongly about one thing. It's nt like he is hanging up a mets jersey and you are a Yankees fan. It's a freaking head. Yuck.
foundmylove
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Re: I need some help ladies...
lol i totally agree-in my fh parents house they have a deer head
but you can tell him he can have a man room like in the basement and display it there maybe??
like my fh wants a man room to have cigars and smoke them
MissingLI
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Re: I need some help ladies...
Posted by DCgirl82
Posted by MissingLI
What if you put it in these terms:
FH, you would view the head as a trophy of your sport. I see it as a LIFE. A life that was cut short. A life that was beautiful. A life that I had no ability to save. I would have nothing but pain every time I saw it's eyes. It would be as if you asked me to hang my pet on the wall. It was a living breathing thing that you took from the world. I can maybe accept you doing it, if I don't have to look at it.
Harsh. But may work.
This is just perfect!!! <3 and its really exactly how I feel!
Let us know how it works out!!!
chris1082
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Re: I need some help ladies...
You are not wrong at all....I would not want that in my home either!!!
I'm against hunting but I do think it's good that he at least uses the meat and doesn't do it for the 'sport.' I think that's a big difference.
I don't have any good advice though
Where does he want to display it?? I would think that it wouldn't go with the decor of any room unless the whole house had that woodsy, upstate decor....
Pacie
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Re: I need some help ladies...
No I don't think so at all. You are respecting the fact that he wants to hunt - even though you disagree with it- so he should respect the fact that you don't want a dead animal head hanging in your living room.
DCgirl82
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Re: I need some help ladies...
Thank you all for your help <3 Love you girls!!
Update: We talked last night for like 2 hours and I was actually crying over the whole thing.. I explained to him how upset and disgusted I would be knowing that the head of an animal that was once alive and breathing would be hanging up.. I said its not decoration its an animal! He finally got it I think... We compromised.. he said what if I find antlers or something while out there? I said if you FOUND them and didnt take them off the deer then you can put them in your Man room cause I dont wanna see them either. At least the antlers arent as bad as the whole head!
VCanizalez
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Re: I need some help ladies...
Posted by DCgirl82
Thank you all for your help <3 Love you girls!!
Update: We talked last night for like 2 hours and I was actually crying over the whole thing.. I explained to him how upset and disgusted I would be knowing that the head of an animal that was once alive and breathing would be hanging up.. I said its not decoration its an animal! He finally got it I think... We compromised.. he said what if I find antlers or something while out there? I said if you FOUND them and didnt take them off the deer then you can put them in your Man room cause I dont wanna see them either. At least the antlers arent as bad as the whole head!
I am so sorry DC u were crying... and I am happy You guys were able to compromise...
MissingLI
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Re: I need some help ladies...
I'm so happy that it seems that he heard you and how you were feeling about it. Hopefully though, he'll never find any antlers out there.
DCgirl82
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Posted by MissingLI
I'm so happy that it seems that he heard you and how you were feeling about it. Hopefully though, he'll never find any antlers out there.
Keeping my fingers crossed
DCgirl82
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Re: I need some help ladies...
I am so sorry DC u were crying... and I am happy You guys were able to compromise...
Thanks V! <3 u
mrsq2be
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Re: I need some help ladies...
Posted by MissingLI
No you are not wrong. This is something that you feel very strongly about. You are compromising in the way that even though you hate the thought of him going out and killing an animal you would never stop him from doing it because the sport is something he enjoys.
You need to show him that you showed him respect in not standing in the way of doing something he enjoyes even though you dislike it, he needs to respect your feelings of not being able to look at a dead animal in your home.
This isn't about a shade of wall color. This is a deeply personal choice. It seems like a slap in the face to your compromise. You aren't asking him to change his beliefs but he is asking you to change yours.
THIS!
my FH hunts as well with his brothers and father, as did my father in the past. like your FH they both make use out of the meat etc and don't jsut do it for fun... My father has a head also.. in the garage.
That was my paren'ts compromise.
That would be my compromise to my FH also if he wanted to do that... becuase Iam with you, I could never look at it... you definitely aren't wrong by any means. this is what you feel very strongly about.
Have you tried asking him maybe hanging it somehwere where yo won't frequent?? would that work for you?
mrsq2be
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Re: I need some help ladies...
Posted by DCgirl82
Thank you all for your help <3 Love you girls!!
Update: We talked last night for like 2 hours and I was actually crying over the whole thing.. I explained to him how upset and disgusted I would be knowing that the head of an animal that was once alive and breathing would be hanging up.. I said its not decoration its an animal! He finally got it I think... We compromised.. he said what if I find antlers or something while out there? I said if you FOUND them and didnt take them off the deer then you can put them in your Man room cause I dont wanna see them either. At least the antlers arent as bad as the whole head!
jsut saw this after i posted.. thats a good compromise then, as long as you are okay with it. <3 you mich!
