so today I went out to my FH's familys in valley stream to visit his sick grandmother in the hospital..shes doing alot better but this was my first real experiance with everyone having somthing to say about MY wedding. I havent seen his family since we got engaged and all my family and friends are sooooooooo supportive and dont say anything about any of my plans.
a few things they said which upset and hurt me and I know i shouldnt let it get to me
his 18 yr old sister who is one of my bridesmaids wa sso mean to me,
she looks at my ring and goes..ehhh its ok!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I wanted to punch her. u have no idea
then shes complaining that she wants to wear a short dress like to her thighs for the wedding and she doesnt like long...well sorry hunny..its a formal wedding
then she says she doesnt like black bc it wont show her tan
then i was telling her how I want all my girls to wear their hair up since im wearing it down and she goessss nooooooo i wanna wear my hair down...u wear your up
helllloooo its my wedding ....ommggg
then the rest of the family complained that since im doing black and pink that black are funeral colors and its going to be bad luck
I just am really upset..ugh...sorry for complaining..i just know u guys understand..
how do u guys deal with things like this? and not seem like a 'bridezilla'
LuvMyAlfonse
Posted:
Member since
Re: I sooooo need to vent
Oh Jess, that stinks! 18 yr old brats are the WORST!
Beat the crap out of her when she's walking home alone (and make sure your ring leaves a big ole imprint on her forehead!)....
Just suck it up and do what you want. Especially about the black BM dresses - are they out of their freakin minds? Black BM dresses are stunning!
Sorry Jess!
AMGBride2008
Posted:
Member since
Re: I sooooo need to vent
Well, just keep in mind that your FSIL is only 18. Tell her straight up, if you don't like it than you don't have to be in the BP. Who cares if you sound like a Bridezilla. As for the rest of the family... the only way I would deal with negative comments would be to not tak to them about the wedding. If they ask, sure, tell them what they want to know, but don't feel the need to explain yourself at all. Luckily you said you don't see them often, so you won't have to worry about hearing their comments very often.
Sorry you had such a shittty run in. What does your FH say??
korndoggie
Posted:
Member since
Re: I sooooo need to vent
Sorry you have to deal with this, I don't have anything else to say that already hasn't been said but I think your ring is beautiful! Congrats!
truelove5803
Posted:
Member since
Re: I sooooo need to vent
awww honey I'm sorry. I would just try to ignore themand remember that it's your day not their's. But I do think that someone needs to sit that sister down and give her a good talking to. she's old enought to realize that the world doesn't revolve around her. She needs to grow up and realize that she has been given an honor to be your BM and that it can be taken away.
BubbasBride
Posted:
Member since
Re: I sooooo need to vent
I'm sorry they are so rude! People will never understand - if you have nothing nice to say, say nothing at all.
Just nod and smile, then do what you want.
That's what I've been doing
meggles808
Posted:
Member since
Re: I sooooo need to vent
This is my saying to everyone that bothers me about it.
ITS MY DAY SO IT GOES MY WAY!!!
ShanonandSteve
Posted:
Member since
Re: I sooooo need to vent
It is your wedding and FH's wedding.
no matter what you do someone is going to have something to complain about... its annoying.. but thats just the way it is going to be.
so ignore them and go for what you two want. it is our day, and everything should be the way you want it to be.
and black is elegant. I am going with black too. If one more of FH's family members use the word 'morbid' when they describe our wedding.. I may hurt them... but as of now i am doing my best to ignore them.
KSquared
Posted:
Member since
Re: I sooooo need to vent
I definitly agree that she is immature, 18 is young, maybe you could just talk to her and explain that it's not appropriate to react that way and that a bridesmaid is there for the bride - to be helpful and supportive. Another thing - if her grandmother is really quite sick, she might be really upset and acting mean to distance herself - people do that a lot. Just a thought.
alymikewedding08
Posted:
Member since
Re: I sooooo need to vent
OMGGGGGGGGGG I hate that crap.. I would think that my family would be the ones complaining to me.. being that they are MY family and feel comfortable b**ching and moaning to me.. but noooooooooo it's his family that constantly has the comments.. I hate it hate it hate it..
TakingtheLongWay
Posted:
Member since
Re: I sooooo need to vent
Posted by MPAS
SHe has to be in your wedding party right? If not I would say take her out. Dont listen to what other people say , its your wedding, its your day. People are just jealous. Hope you feel better
I would say 'take them all out'..... Just kidding. Tell them all tough #*&^ and I don't think you could ever come off looking like a Bridezilla, because those people are just plain RUDE!!
TakingtheLongWay
Posted:
Member since
Re: I sooooo need to vent
Posted by meggles808
This is my saying to everyone that bothers me about it.
ITS MY DAY SO IT GOES MY WAY!!!
I love it!
Mrs. V 2008
Posted:
Member since
Re: I sooooo need to vent
thats soo annoying..ignore her! sounds like jealousy to me! I've gotten those ring comments also like 'its so plain' it makes me feel bad...especially lately! but your is beautiful so don't let her get to you
nmagel
Posted:
Member since
Re: I sooooo need to vent
everybody always has something to say!!
sugar4spc
Posted:
Member since
Re: I sooooo need to vent
i truly dont understand where people come off saying have the crap they say. IT is soo true colors really come out when it comes to wedding bells. This is insane. I would tell Fh how i felt and let him know that i really dont appreciate it and that i am not looking forward to having her in my party.
Autumn08
Posted:
Member since
Re: I sooooo need to vent
For the most part I ignore annoying comments! But if it's with my mom I show her pictures. Instead of black and white I wanted to do brown and white for fall. She was like 'OMG brown for a wedding!' Then I showed her some pictures. Especially Autmbride's review and pictures. She really liked it then. CaMacho's Wedding was black and pink and think it was gorgeous! Show them some of these ideas. As for his sister, she can wear what ever she wants if she's a regular guest!!! I don't know how well that would go over though.
Munchkn16
Posted:
Member since
Re: I sooooo need to vent
Nod and smile and say, in the most innocent voice you can summon, 'Well this is what I always wanted for my wedding.' If the 18 year-old gets b*tchy, tel her to do whatever she wants when SHE'S the birde!
Ilovebriani
Posted:
Member since
Re: I sooooo need to vent
wooow!!! his sister does not sound very nice!! she should be happy to even be in the bridal party! that is so rude! try not to stress though, it really is not your job to make her happy. it is YOUR wedding. and the things that you want to do are NOT unreasonable. there is no need for her to complain.
Blondie77
Posted:
Member since
Re: I sooooo need to vent
can i ask where your FMIL was for this? i can't believe you are worried about being a bridezilla.....there is absolutely no excuse for that behavior.....not that i haven't gotten comments about my ring etc., but that goes beyond. i will also say black BM dresses rock.
you should end every sentence with 'i'm the bride.' it will drive her crazy. also give her a lot of attitude. she needs to be put in her place.
SeaMaiden
Posted:
Member since
Re: I sooooo need to vent
I understand that frustration feeling you have, I am in a similar situation. You just have to keep telling yourself that her behavior is truly out of jealousy and wanting to be the center of attention. You have some time before the wedding to see if she will mature or at least shut her mouth but I wouldnt bet on it. It's just one of the crappy parts about merging two families.
