I think I have a social phobia...

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Posted by 121502

OMG, I can't even believe the response this thread got! I seriously thought I was the only one (in a figurative way). I'm so glad I came back tonight to check this thread. And as some of you stated....I, too, am terrified to pick up the phone and call people. Especially now that there's caller id, I think that if someone doesn't answer, it's because they saw it was me I don't know what's wrong with me. With my friends and family, I am very outgoing, but I cannot be normal around people I don't know well. Either I say NOTHING or I run my mouth so bad that I look like a complete fool. And I notice it happening at work. I am just so convinced all the people I work with think I am a moron because I just babble and make no sense at all. Put me in a room with kids and I can talk to them until I am blue in the face, throw their parents in the mix and I forget what the hell I'm there for. And I am already dreading back to school night which is over a week away. I just cannot speak to adults. I just feel like everyone is judging me. I really need to get a grip

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Rachel, you sound just like me . . . I am SO dreading Open House

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Posted by The Original 2nd-time-around

I could have written that myself. I'm just not sociable with people I dont know and never know what to say.

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Same here! I know how you feel. I just never have done anything about it; oh well.

I am like this too..

If anyone met me in real life.. I am SO shy. I am not good at small talk. It takes me soooo long to get comfortable with people.

I love my FW's friends but I was just so shy and quiet in front of them. FW finally said.. 'People want to know what you are thinking.. Go ahead. Tell them.'

(Now I feel VERY comfy with them.)

I think the best you can do is..

JUST SAY IT!

You never know the reaction you'll get.

I am also a quiet person. I need to get comfortable with the person. Sometimes I would like to make small talk with people, just have no clue what to say.

Or for instance my DH's friends, I know them by now but I still am quiet with them. They all speak polish and I know the language but I was born here in brooklyn. I still don't know all of the words and to me some of them just talk too fast and I can't catch it. I hate when they are laughing and I have no idea why. When it is just the girls I started responding to them in english so they would speak to me in english, then it is fine.

Still my nature to be quiet though.

I am only myself when I have a longtime friend that I hang out with often.

I'm not normally shy - I used to talk to anyone when I was younger (to the point that mom and dad had to sit me down a few times about the 'no talking to strangers' rule) but as I got older I became more self-conscious about myself. In my 20's I would go out and not talk to any guys. My freinds were like 'Mary you won't meet anyone if you never have a conversation with them' but it always seemed like I never had anything interesting to talk about and I stink at flirting.

As I got into my 30's I guess I figured 'hey I'm 30 what do I have to lose?' and I talk to people. I have to be on the phone alot where I work. I don't like talking in front of a group of people though - like a presentation or in a class - I thought I'd be OK but when I subbed, I actually found I was not that good at it!

I'm the one that everyone says is 'outgoing'. I don't see it that much but I woudln't say I was shy either.

I wouldn't say you have a phobia though - maybe just get a 'who the hell cares what these people think of me' attitude - then maybe you'll feel better about social situations.


ETA (which is why I posted..) Jola I like you get quiet around DH's friends. Not all of them because some of them are outgoing and talk to anyone and we have a blast. But some of them (who he's working with now on this new job ) don't talk to me at all and talk over me and too fast and while it's in English their brogues are hard to understand so I get quiet too. Bugs me - I like to go out w/ DH sometimes but not with those particular guys.

Mary,

I hate talking on the phone at my job also even in front of my coworkers. I don't like people listening to me

The one great thing about knowing another language, I speak to my DH in polish at work.

We should all have a GTG and get over our social phobia.

But then we might just be sitting there staring at each other because of the fact.

I feel like i could have written this thread... I am so bad in some social sitautions. I think I've even gotten worse the past few years (and I was horribly shy when i was younger so this doesn't say much for me now).

The anxiety I begin to feel when I know I have to go to places where I don't know very many people is an extreme feeling... DH even noticed it more lately, and said that sometimes he thinks I'm going to have a panick atttack because I begin to get myself all worked up!

And oh yeah I'm just as bad on the phone.. I sound like a MORON when I call to make appointments and the like. Funny enough, in my professional setting I'm fine (making appointments for my boss, etc) Its just when speaking on MY OWN behalf I'm a dunce!

I really am a chatty Kathy when I know you... and once I get comfortable in a setting, I am ok after awhile. But truly, I am a dork otherwise

So to those who I may meet at the next GTG.. be warned that I'm a little strange before I open up and warm up!!!