I'm sorry - I know this is really long, but I'm in PA this weekend, no where near my family & friends so I have no one else to vent to
My FH & I just drove here with his much younger brother (7 years) to visit their dad & my FMIL. So we're having a good time when suddenly his brother brings the wedding up..which would have been fine but it snowballs & it suddenly comes out that HIS girlfriend is really, REALLLLLLLY upset that I didn't ask her to be a bridesmaid (he vehemently denies it, but it was VERY clear he felt the same way). She apparently feels that she will now feel 'out of place' that day because she's not family & not a bridal party member. I love this girl, but she's been away at college for the bulk of the 2 1/2 years I've been around, so if you put it all together we've maybe hung out 10, 15 times max...I don't 'really' know her & she's not my FH's sister!! But wait, it gets better...she also apparently feels that 'she has been around longer than I have so she SHOULD have been asked to be in the bridal party.' Ummm...so you've know my FH & his family 2+ years more than I have so you have more of a right to be one of my BMs than my best friends of 21 years & my sis-in-law?!?! W T F?!?! They both really feel that since she's been around longer than I have that their opinions & feelings about how we should do our wedding are more important & should mean more to my FH than mine do!!! Oh and then it was questioned why my brothers - my BLOOD - got to be groomsmen when his GF (not even his FW!!!) wasn't given the same consideration as them! I was actually asked if that had been my idea to take away from his friends to replace with my family and if so why I didn't give [my FH] the same consideration?
I can't win. I'm exhausted. It never even dawned on me to ask this girl, but now apparently there's been all this bad blood brewing out there & directed at me from his bro & his GF over this. I'm apparently a thoughtless & rude *****. I know that it shouldn't bother me, but it does. I considered these people friends, but it seems that they're both mad at me & talk about me now over this. What is it about weddings? WHY does it bring out the worst in people? I've been trying my best to be good and conscientious (sp?) and to try and keep everyone as happy as can be and while I know that's impossible, I never dreamed that I'd be full-on pissing people off like this, unintentionally, but I'm doing it all the same. Thankfully my FH was just as shocked & called his bro on everything & said it was ridiulous, but the damage is done. I just don't know what to do....
Thanks for letting me get that off of my chest...
akaMrsT
Posted:
Member since
Re: I think I'm going to cry...
Weddings bring out the worst in people She will get over it or maybe she will be so upset that she will not attend and save you some $$$$ And maybe FBIL will meet one of your BM's and marry her instead One can only dream
I am just so over people imposing their views on someone else's wedding plans. A friend just had an all out war with his family since he married a Catholic woman in a Catholic church and with a unity candle. His mom and grandma almost did not attend the wedding since they are Jewish...but according to HIM they are just as Jewish as me and have never celebrated ANY Jewish holidays nor do they have real knowledge about Judaism He felt that they just sprung this on him to make the wedding more about them
