I think Im having a bridezilla moment but am I right to HELP!!!! UPDATE

Original post by FutureMrs.M

Dec 02, 2008 08:09 AM

Last night my brother asked me if I would mind if he got engaged this february (my one year to go mark)and at first I was like yeah...then I asked well if you did when would you get married and he was like well a year or so after that...SO HE'S NOT EVEN GIVING ME A FEW MONTHS...Im soooo aggrivated. I would never steal someones thunder like this...and he doesnt seem to care. When I asked him to push it off a few months until maybe next fall he said telling me was just a technicality...so why bother asking me!!! He is 22 years old and in february will only be at his job for 2 months...I am flipping and needed to vent!!!AHHHHHH!

JenBill61210 Posted: Dec 02, 2008 03:49 PM

Re: I think Im having a bridezilla moment but am I right to HELP!!!!

i know how you feel because FH and I were in teh same situation w/ his brother, we got engaged and he wanted to propose to his gf like a month later.. FH got pissed and told him to wait and he ended up waiting another 2 months or so but in the end i was just like 'whatever'...

w/ regards to the wedding now i would really be pissed if his wedding was on top of mine which thankfully its not.. i would talk with your bro and just try to convince him it may be a better idea for him to wait until late summer or fall and might be less pressure on your family as well.

mikendeanna Posted: Dec 02, 2008 04:57 PM

Re: I think Im having a bridezilla moment but am I right to HELP!!!!

I would be pissed also... This is your time to shine... Tell your bother it is ok to get engaged but he better wait a while until u get married

mosh424 Posted: Dec 03, 2008 05:36 AM

Re: I think Im having a bridezilla moment but am I right to HELP!!!!

Posted by DnT2010

AHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!

my sister threatened my life that we couldnt get engaged until after her wedding...

but to be honest.. we WOULD NEVER do that to her anyway.. its her moment and her thunder and once in a life time i could never take that away from her.. BUT i do think its different because hes your BROTHER not your SISTER.. and to be honest your parents wont be as consumed in his wedding as they would be in yours..

i wouldnt care about the engagement now but i would ask him to wait a few months after your wedding to get married.. especially if you have OOT guests.. maybe they wont be able to afford coming to both so close together.

for you.. stay clam!!!!

ITA You are their daughter, and when it comes to weddings Daughters and Sons are very different. My parents were not involved with the planning or anything for my brothers wedding because SIL didn't include them but for me they are helping me with everything!!! I would def. talk to him about too!

FutureMrs.M Posted: Dec 03, 2008 08:15 AM

Re: I think Im having a bridezilla moment but am I right to HELP!!!!

thanks ladies for all the support. I have a feeling my parents will be helping him and his gf cuz she just moved here and her parents still live in penn, but they are getting married here so thats how that will go

::UPDATE:: So my parents are pissed at me and think that I am being a selfish princess...whatever they have repeatedly told me that this is not all about me (which I disagree but whatever) so Im just gonna have to learn to ignore that. I spoke to my brother last night and he said he has no intention of setting a date any time soon, so he apologized for saying it would be right after mine. When he does he and his gf and FH and I can talk about what we feel is appropriate so everyone gets there time. So I feel better that is starting to get it

lizzie217 Posted: Dec 03, 2008 08:45 AM

Re: I think Im having a bridezilla moment but am I right to HELP!!!! UPDATE

Sorry to crash but I have to say as long as yours is first who cares? My brother got engaged two months before me..FH planned on doing it and wasnt going to wait a year or two for my brother to get married. Put your self in your brothers shoes...if had been first would you want to wait a year or two to get engaged?

I did get married after my brother bc I felt since he was engaged first he shuld get married first. He got married in July 08 and I got married in November 08. HTH

DnT2010 Posted: Dec 03, 2008 09:28 AM

Re: I think Im having a bridezilla moment but am I right to HELP!!!! UPDATE

Posted by FutureMrs.M

thanks ladies for all the support. I have a feeling my parents will be helping him and his gf cuz she just moved here and her parents still live in penn, but they are getting married here so thats how that will go

::UPDATE:: So my parents are pissed at me and think that I am being a selfish princess...whatever they have repeatedly told me that this is not all about me (which I disagree but whatever) so Im just gonna have to learn to ignore that. I spoke to my brother last night and he said he has no intention of setting a date any time soon, so he apologized for saying it would be right after mine. When he does he and his gf and FH and I can talk about what we feel is appropriate so everyone gets there time. So I feel better that is starting to get it

at least hes starting to get it.. but i don tunderstand is why get engaged RIGHT NOW if you have NO intentions of setting a date anytime soon..

FutureMrs.M Posted: Dec 03, 2008 03:35 PM

Re: I think Im having a bridezilla moment but am I right to HELP!!!! UPDATE

i feel that way too but I dont need to be called a selfabsorbed princess any more

FutureMrs.M Posted: Dec 03, 2008 03:37 PM

Re: I think Im having a bridezilla moment but am I right to HELP!!!! UPDATE

Posted by lizzie217

Sorry to crash but I have to say as long as yours is first who cares? My brother got engaged two months before me..FH planned on doing it and wasnt going to wait a year or two for my brother to get married. Put your self in your brothers shoes...if had been first would you want to wait a year or two to get engaged?

I did get married after my brother bc I felt since he was engaged first he shuld get married first. He got married in July 08 and I got married in November 08. HTH

wouldnt do it personally...especially if I had the other financial issues that my brother does... and if he is pushing the wedding off until 2011 anyway he could push the engagement off until 2010...but whatever

lizzie217 Posted: Dec 04, 2008 02:42 PM

Re: I think Im having a bridezilla moment but am I right to HELP!!!! UPDATE

The thing that confuses me is why you feel you have the right to tell your brother to push back his engagement? I mean I am very close with my brother but I would feel like I was crossing the line telling him when to get engaged..thats just me though.

FutureMrs.M Posted: Dec 04, 2008 03:05 PM

Re: I think Im having a bridezilla moment but am I right to HELP!!!! UPDATE

no not his engagement...i feel that the weddings should be further apart for mulitple reasons

1. The finiancial responsibilties we will have by being in each others weddings (can we afford to be apart of each others when worry about paying for our own)

2. The finanicial matters of our families

3. Party scheduling conflicts (showers, and engagement parties)

4. Travel concerns for family