I know this sounds bad, but I sooo did not want a wedding.. i wish we would have eloped. I am not good at planning anything let alone a wedding, and i really hate being the center of attention.
The shower coming up in 2 weeks is driving me nuts.. it will just be me they are there for..
I am just thankful we are having a smaller wedding 60-80 guests. The reason why we are having the wedding is becaus my FH wanted it. But, i am the one that has to do most of planning, and go to the shower... And when I bought my $1500 wedding dress, i literally almost burst into tears... spending this much on a dress for one day...
Please tell me i am crazy and that i should be happy about having this wedding, and that eloping would have been a bad idea anyways.
qtdimps23
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Member since
Re: i want to cry....
oh cheer up sweetie! just think of the outcome to all of this. you will be married! if you chose that dress, you chose it for a reason. maybe once you see how beautiful you will look in it all done up you'll feel alittle better? why don't you have your FH stay for the wedding? so you can share the spotlight?
bettybcafe
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Member since
Re: i want to cry....
Thats the same exact thinking I had before I got engaged...but once I got engaged all of that changed. I then wanted the big wedding and flowers, HM, guest etc... Trust me, planning a wedding is a lot of work..but it will def. be worth it at the end..you will be so happy when you are walking the aisle to the man that you are going to be with for the rest of your life. Tons of hugs going your way.
chatxleau24
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Member since
Re: i want to cry....
u r not crazy!! i feel the same way - only i paid close to double for my dress!! and my guest list has turned into 300+ ppl!!!! all these ppl looking at me!!!!
im having a wedding for MOB and MOG.
im crying too hun
iamvocal72
Posted:
Member since
Re: i want to cry....
Posted by chatxleau24
u r not crazy!! i feel the same way - only i paid close to double for my dress!! and my guest list has turned into 300+ ppl!!!! all these ppl looking at me!!!!
im having a wedding for MOB and MOG.
im crying too hun
WHY?????
So silly! This is YOUR LIFE!!! WHO CARES what they all want, if they want to throw you a party, yipee but if you seriously don't want a wedding WHY???
It's not worth it, it just isn't. Stop. Get real with yourself and with them. There is NO REASON for this. Weddings are stressful events and not for everyone.
Do me a favor - CLICK HERE!!!! Go to that site. Do some soul searching. Talk to your FH's. Really dig down deep. DON'T do this for someone else. NO ONE is worth this kind of hassle BUT YOU! (well, and your FH) SERIOUSLY - resentment is an evil, evil thing.... NOT WORTH IT!
Sigh... It will be OK. If you are unhappy and sad you are allowed to be unhappy and sad. Don't let ANYONE tell you what you SHOULD be. I am so tired of everyone telling me I SHOULD be happy! Just be what you are and try to figure out why you are there and not somewhere else. Couples therapy and individual therapy are also VERY helpful - NOT because you SHOULD be happy but because you WANT to be. I hope that you both can find some joy in your wedding planning and if I not I hope you reconsider spending the thousands of dollars on something else.
poogie
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Member since
Re: i want to cry....
I dont think your crazy...you feel the way you feel and thats that. Just remeber on this site 'your not alone' frankly I have been engaged for 3/4 years and would rather go to the justic also but fh wanted a small party too. impossible, we are both people poeple and come from large families.
Dont feel crazy, just think of the fun. most fh's dont get really involved. i beg my fh to go with me to those wedding shows and what a mistake....he stands in the corner with his lip falling to the floor and grilling me with the evil eye......okay so what do the vendors think? 'what in the crap is she doing planning to spend the rest of her life with that jerk?' so its my fault, i know he hates those things but i hope that it rubs off just a little.......
feel good about your day, 10 people to 100 people it doesnt matter. yes it is work and i wont lie. i love planning but i too have become a little lazy and just like 'i am doing this all by myself'. FH thinks i am avoiding him, but he doesnt understand what really goes into this.
i have to say everyone here listens, shares good and bad time together. The best part, we dont know eachother so there are no judgements passed. 'We are here for you...so share your joys and concerns'
Feel better and go look in the mirror and say 'This is going to be my day and i am the spot standing in the light and i can do this'
hunnybunnyxoxo
Posted:
Member since
Re: i want to cry....
sorry!! i am sending
you know i hear a lot of brides that elope and than regret not having a wedding..
maybe its not your taste to have a traditional wedding but at the very least your children will get to look at pics of you when you got married.
and if its what you fi wants than i think you should respect his wants too...
just keep everything basic and simple... good luck!!
jessruth9
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Member since
Re: i want to cry....
Have your FH stay for the shower or keep your MOH very close to you. For the wedding just remember that the whole point is your marraige, not your wedding. The only eyes you need to worry about are his that will gaze on you as you walk down the aisle. Everyone else is there to share in your joy. Planning s***s but the day will be wonderful. Good Luck and keep your head up!!!
portjeffbride
Posted:
Member since
Re: i want to cry....
Are you experiencing anxiety because you'll be the center of attention? (I'm guessing that becuase of your comments about the shower.)
Please know that would be normal.... many people feel that way, and feel a bit tense before the ceremony... very quickly they calm down and enjoy the day....
Don't worry about the dress $$$. You can sell it on ebay and recoup at least $500-700....
NY2Cincinnati
Posted:
Member since
Re: i want to cry....
Posted by maressa
And when I bought my $1500 wedding dress, i literally almost burst into tears... spending this much on a dress for one day...
I did cry when after my first fitting right there in the bridal shop when my Mom was paying. My Mom looked at me and asked what was wrong and if I did not like the dress anymore. I told her I loved the dress but the thought of spending so much on a dress upset me and the fact that my parents are willing to spend so much on me and my FH for one day upset me more. I keep telling my SIL that my wedding is just a birthday party for her since we are getting married on her b-day and that I am just wearing a white dress thats all.
I am exactally there with you. I hate being the center of attention and in fact orginally wanted a very tiny wedding with just our close family but FH wanted a big wedding so we agreed to have around 100-120 people. I am just not into being the center of attention and wish at times we could just up and go get married and be done with it.
