I'm done

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Posted by krislee316

awwwww I am so sorry try and relax and have a talk later when you are more calm. Some times we say things out of anger so its best to wait till you are more calm.

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ITA! Its better to wait to talk when you are calmer. I say some terrible things when Im angry! I hope you guys can work everything out.

Eeekkk! I am truly sorry for the stress.

Some guys just don't appreciate things. They just don't know any better. I am sorry. Things will get better. You both need some time to cool off a little bit.

I hear this fight happening a lot of times.... at least 2 coworkers had the same fights while they were planning.

aww! i'm sorry that you're feeling this way. (not that i blame you)... it's definitely not easy sometimes. but i just went through this not too long ago with other family members...and you really should first calm down, and don't make any decisions when you're emotional. you won't think clearly. however, venting is important too!! so vent away :o) it will get better, just hang in there!

I'm so sorry but I think we've all been where you are now, you have to keep going, it's going to be a wonderful day, and FH will realize how much work you put into it and really appreciate it,. FH hasn't done much either, I've learned to do things on my own and just 'surprise' him! Good luck, we're all here if you need to vent!

If it makes you feel any better, I told my FH that the wedding is a waste and its too much money and he tried to stick a cupcake down my throat

When he gets home, try using a bana cream pie... and tell him that if he never complains again you'll lick it off!

Just trying to make you smile hun. I know weddings are insane and stressful

I am so sorry you are going through this... FH and I fought a LOT after we got engaged because of the wedding.. Every once in a rare while a small wedding-related argument will still arise. Just try to calm down a bit and talk it out with him later.. Don't rush to call anything off without giving it a lot of rational thought (meaning.. don't think while angry.. I know first hand that all rationale goes out the window when it's the heat of the moment!!!)

Listen we've all been there and continue to be there Im sure. There have been plenty of times where it caused a fight between FH and I because I am sooooo excited about something and he shows ABSOLUTELY no interest, cant even fake a smile or a hey thats great! and I get PISSED! and I always feel he ***** the joy out of the things that make me happy! And whoa GOD FORBID I did that when he talked to me about football or the housing market OMG he would and has thrown a fit wheN I dont show interest!

I LOVE my FH to death, but they can seriously be the biggest babies in the WHOLE world! My FH helped with all the major stuff (Hall, DJ, Photo, etc) but left all the girly stuff to me including the florist and to tell you the truth Im soo glad he did because he doesnt have patience or interest like I do and I DO get that. I tried the sharing when I got excited for ordering something or telling him I had a GREAT idea to hear o really and watch this disgusted look wash over his face like O and why do we need that for? Isnt that stupid? TALK ABOUT RAINING ON A PARADE!!!

So the point Im making is, they ALL have no interest. So I share stuff with my gf's, my mom, FMIL, and friends at work. This way I get it out of my system and I get to share it with women who understand what and why Im buying or doing the things I do...

In regards to him not saving THATS SOOO NOT KOOL AT ALL! THAT is an issue I would seriously sit down and discuss calmly one night. Even over dinner. Why isnt he saving and you are? This is a wedding for BOTH of you, not just you. I mean how unhappy is he with the fact that you are getting married here and not eloping? Is it so much so that he doesnt want to do it at all? Maybe thats something you should talk to him about? =/

I say vent and DONT do anything you will regret. Weddings bring out the best in some and the ugly in others... And the UGLY IS UGLY! Ive said that in another post as well.

You have Gf's and us here to gloat about stuff with so go ahead and share stuff with other people, youll be happy you did. And it will make for a happier relationship at home with your FH. =)) Win win situation. But there are def some issues you guys need to sit and discuss rationaly like 2 adults. =))

I'm sorry to hear this. I think that you should definitely have a serious talk with him when you are calm because you both need to be on the same page. We had similar fights, but when I explained how worried I was, it seemed to really sink in. I explained that I wanted to make sure that we were splitting all the payments and that we were not going to fight over money in the future. He has amazed me with his saving, especially recently. There were points where I never thought this would be possible, and now the wedding is a month away and we are both so excited. Everything seems to have just worked out, but it definitely takes the effort and interest of both people. I hope you guys can resolve this. Good luck!

Thanks girls... Now I'm leaving work ad heading to the pit of doom.. We'll hope traffic doesn't tick me off more then we really get into it..lol

Thanks again

the most important thing here is communication... you have to talk to him about how you are feeling about his comments. marriage is a lot of work and there will be other arguments (especially about money) once your married... and it's no longer about 'my' money and 'his' money- you are together in this. if you want this to work, then you must talk to him about it. take deep breaths before you do and think about the things you want to tell him before you go bananas. if you start yelling and screaming, he'll look at you like you're crazy and not take you seriously. and, IMO, this is HIS wedding TOO. if he wanted something small then he needs to vocalize this to you- all the blame should not be placed on you... and DON'T just let it go and continue with planning and spending and not tell him about it just for arguments' sake- this is only the beginning and good practice for your marriage- you need to talk to him. good luck, i'm sure all will turn out ok!!!

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Posted by MrsCastanedain09

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Posted by GRod2Be

Don't call off your wedding you'll lose your deposit . Don't worry alot of them say that, my FH hates the fact that we are having a wedding. He just wants to elope. Don't listen to him and keep with your planning . I now no longer tell my FH anything important regarding the wedding because i know a fight will happen or he'll say something upsetting.

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ITA! My FMIL told me NOT to tell her son every little detail and expense. She said, 'he has no appreciation for these things until he see's it excecuted, don't let him ruin this.'

Hang in there

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I think you FMIL gave you very good advice....I learned that a few months into things

ITA!!! Vent your *** off here with us and try to stay calm for now. Dont do anything harsh. After you are calmer you two seriously need to have a discussion. If you guys are fighting now about the wedding and him not saving imagine how it will be after you guys are married.
In time you'll know whats right for YOURSELF.

You have so much time left before it all has to be paid! Just take it step by step

Awww...hang in there... man really do act like babies from time to time.... just keep in mind of the real reason that you are going through all this. Please keep us posted that everything works out OK. You guys will get through this bump....we all hit it from time to time...wedding planning gets the best of us. I'm sorry. Hang in there!

Well I get home and do you think anything is said to me about the fight we're having???

Nope. Nothing. Nada!

Not a word was spoken except... 'What's for dinner?'

Um you got out of work at 4.. You didn't HAVE to go to the gym. You could have made dinner for the kids and for me for when I got home.

No instead I fork over money AGAIN to order chinese because I don't get home until 6:40 and I wasn't having the kids starve.

I'm starting to feel this is not worth it anymore. I'm sitting here typing to you guys and hes sitting on the couch doing nothing but watching TV.

I think this is just a huge mess and needs to stop.

I'm just really angry ladies I'm sorry

I really hope everything works out.

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Posted by MrsGarcia

Well I get home and do you think anything is said to me about the fight we're having???

Nope. Nothing. Nada!

Not a word was spoken except... 'What's for dinner?'

Um you got out of work at 4.. You didn't HAVE to go to the gym. You could have made dinner for the kids and for me for when I got home.

No instead I fork over money AGAIN to order chinese because I don't get home until 6:40 and I wasn't having the kids starve.

I'm starting to feel this is not worth it anymore. I'm sitting here typing to you guys and hes sitting on the couch doing nothing but watching TV.

I think this is just a huge mess and needs to stop.

I'm just really angry ladies I'm sorry

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ok i think u need to talk 2 him..not a tal where u talk he does not pay attention but a serious adults only talk..u do not want to go into marriage thinking this way..maybe he does not even realize what he is doing..maybe he does..but either way if u r having serious doubts..serious..u need to tell him

That sounds like he was being a real jerk. Sorry but he is a grown up and he can prepare dinner too. Its not the 1950's anymore. And he should be saving... if not for the wedding, at least for your financial future. You are not marrying him to be his mom and you need to let him know that. Raise the bar!