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im FREAKING OUT!!! AM I WRONG??

lishbone Posted:

im FREAKING OUT!!! AM I WRONG??

im so mad right now..i just talked to my dad and he was like' oh by the way i need to add another table to the wedding'..im like what? hes inviting like 5-7 more people..which means with guest im sure..ok now he is NOT giving me a dime for this wedding..he offered a gift or to help pay for wedding and i said gift..is this wrong for me to freak out..i have to guarantee 150 people and can only afford that..i have about 190 on my list now and im still not inviting who i would rather have there..he hasnt seen these people since i was like 5 yrs old. i already asked him if he had anyone in mind to invite to my wedding and he gave me thoses names..now i feel like he is making this a high school reunion for himself...what do i do? what if everyone on my list comes and i have all these extra heads? its not in my budget!!! i dont want to use the gift he gives me for these people who i dont know!!! is this rude or is it me?? help
cantwait2bewed Posted:

Re: im FREAKING OUT!!! AM I WRONG??

tell him if he wants more people to come he will have to pay for it.

jennandrob Posted:

Re: im FREAKING OUT!!! AM I WRONG??

Perhaps you can say that if he wants more people to come then he'll have to pay for them? We're giving parents a number of people they could invite and anything over that, they have to pay for.

We have a 175 minimum, and I can't afford too much over that either!!

Best of luck!
Danielle2207 Posted:

Re: im FREAKING OUT!!! AM I WRONG??

Just explain to him that you are not going to sacrifice people you want to invite so he could invite people you don't even really know and financial it isn't feasable espcially since you are paying for it. I had the same problem. Granted my mother is paying for the reception but she had all these friends of hers on the list that I never even met. The hall only holds 300 people and that is not even comfortably. Our list was originally 350 people. I told her nicely that if she invites all these people I will not be able to invite some of friends (friends from work, from high school, etc.) Kind of a guilt trip but she understood and we compromised. The parents have to remember it is YOUR day.

lishbone Posted:

Re: im FREAKING OUT!!! AM I WRONG??

THANKS girls i just needed to vent...this happened like 20 minutes ago and im still heated up...so thank you for the support!!

lvdolphins Posted:

Re: im FREAKING OUT!!! AM I WRONG??

I went through this. My parents kept adding on friends. However, they made a deal with us. They paid for thier friends plates.
I would definitley have a talk w/your dad.

~Best Wishes!
BriBri529 Posted:

Re: im FREAKING OUT!!! AM I WRONG??

Posted by cantwait2bewed

tell him if he wants more people to come he will have to pay for it.



I agree with this. In all fairness, what we did was put our priority list together first and then figured out how many people were left until we hit the max. my parents could afford. The remainder was split in half for both sets of parents to figure out who they wanted to invite. I feel that it is appropriate to allow parents a certain number of guests, but if it goes over what YOU can afford, then your dad should have to pay for the excess. Good Luck!
gNi1125 Posted:

Re: im FREAKING OUT!!! AM I WRONG??

I don't think you're wrong. You have a set amount of people you can afford to invite and I wouldn't take others off the list just to invite people I don't know. I'm not sure if you've explained your situation to him yet but kindly inform him that if he wants to add more ppl to the list he's gonna have to help pay for them.

Kim51103 Posted:

Re: im FREAKING OUT!!! AM I WRONG??

Tell him that HE has to pay for it!!!!!
if hes not helping :(
tinkerwdw Posted:

Re: im FREAKING OUT!!! AM I WRONG??

You are sooo not wrong!!! I would ditto what everyone else said- if he wants them to come, he can pay for them! I am sure after he sees how much it would cost him, he will decide that they weren't that great of 'friends' anyway! ha.

troutster Posted:

Re: im FREAKING OUT!!! AM I WRONG??

i would be upset also if i was you. I think you should definitly talk to your dad and tell him that you have other people who you really want to invite first and if he wants all of his guest to come maybe he could help pay for them.

luvsbob4603 Posted:

Re: im FREAKING OUT!!! AM I WRONG??

I agree with everyone else sit your dad down and say dad i am willing to have yours friends come if your willing to lay out the money for them because i am garnteed a 150 and thats what i can afford now.

Butterflybride Posted:

Re: im FREAKING OUT!!! AM I WRONG??

We explained to DH's mother that we wanted a very small wedding, so when her guest list reached a crazy high (wanting to invite friends from her job that we don't even know and stuff), we complained to her that we didn't want that many people and couldn't afford it. She agreed to pay for her extra people, because she really wanted them there.

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