So far I have my maid of honor and one bridesmaid in my bridal party. When I asked them both to participate, they were very excited and couldn't wait for the planning.
My godparents would frown if I didn't ask their 20 year old daughter (happens to be my cousin) to be a bridesmaid. She's family so I have to include her... So this weekend I asked her: would you be interested in being one of my bridesmaids?
The girl starts asking: 'what color is the dress? You know I don't like pastel colors. Do I have to walk with a complete stranger? Do I have to pay for my own dress and hair and makeup?'
I got annoyed. She basically told me that she would think about it and call me sometime this week to tell me her decision.
If someone close to me asked me to be her bridesmaid, I would be honored. Am I overreacting?
azoodie
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Re: I'm having bridesmaid trouble too!
no!!!!!!!!!!! i think people that just aren't in this frame of mind have trouble understanding things...i know when my friend asked me to be in her bp i was shocked and honored, however, now looking back, i wish i was more into planning and being involved.
so sorry she's being that way
dm24angel
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Re: I'm having bridesmaid trouble too!
NO! Weddings make you see a side of people you havent as they have never had to show it before. Try to remember why you love them , because it will be hard at times. I had a revolving door bridal party due to some bad choices at the beginning, but after all the tears, stress, I ended up with 5 of the most amazing, helpful, caring people...make sure that they are up to the task. YOU NEED people who will help, your gonna need support and understanding. I think you should discuss all the little details with them and try to compromise, if they know you care about what they are worried about, they just might make a 360 turn around. Remember that they are in a different mind set then you are as the bride..that helped me a little.
Mrs_B
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Re: I'm having bridesmaid trouble too!
omg thats horrible! i was hesitant to ask one of my sisters to be my MOH for the simple fact that she just DOES NOT wear dresses.. EVER... but she almost started crying when I asked her. i think that was kinda rude of your cousin to do JMO.
Darcy
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Re: I'm having bridesmaid trouble too!
no, I would have gone back on it right away. I would have said, listen you obviously are not interested enough for me to want you to go through all that.
AnniesSS
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Re: I'm having bridesmaid trouble too!
Wow! I had to sit here and think about what to say cause your cousin's response floored me! How rude! She obviously is a stuck-up little girl with no CLUE how thee things work. And with only 4 months to go to your wedding, she has some nerve. But can you really tell her to just forget about it after you already asked her?! I dunno
marc_rai
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Re: I'm having bridesmaid trouble too!
Maybe she was harboring some feelings of resentment because its only 4 months before the wedding? Did you just start asking all your BM or did you only ask her recently? 20 years old is kind of young, and if you think about it 4 months is not really alot of time to ask people to ante up $$ for dress, make-up, shoes, your shower, ect. So maybe you should be happy that she asked you all these questions now because otherwise it might be 1 month before the wedding and she may tell you that she has no $$$
ETA: No malice in the tone.
germai68
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Re: I'm having bridesmaid trouble too!
Is this the first wedding she is in? That is no way to act.
hmm8191
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Re: I'm having bridesmaid trouble too!
Not at all. I would let her know that if it's too much trouble to forget it!
Some nerve!!
Blu-ize
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Re: I'm having bridesmaid trouble too!
Maybe her parents would pay for everything if they want her to be in the bridal party. She's young...
SUNSHINE24
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Re: I'm having bridesmaid trouble too!
You arent overreacting at all. i asked a total of 9 girls to be my BM and 2 didnt even give me an answer(havent spoke to them since), one said that she couldnt b/c she is getting married a month later and she would have to much to do, and the other was the only reasonable excuse for no, she cant afford it being that she lived in FL and just had her second child. But in the end i am happy about the other people declining, b/c the people that mean the most to me and want to be there for me, are.
