So its been a week and 3 days and tonight my FI has made me mad!
PLEASE NO OFFENSE TO GROOMS WHO ARE DOING THIS BUT...
We were talking tonight and he mentioned how he wanted light blue tuxedos - I kinda laughed it off - and then he told me that he was serious bc thats what his dad had at his wedding! We got into such a huge fight because he knows how strongly I have been wishing for a traditional wedding (which would include black tuxedos). Plus, I come from such an old school Italian family.. it just would be horrible.
Plus... we kid around with each other ALOT... but sometimes he will jokingly say - 'yeah well then give me back the ring.' He is totally kidding - I know for sure... but it still bothers me... and I told him that tonight and he got offended.
We just had a bad night. SORRY SO LONG. I needed to vent.
AGAIN I HOPE I DIDN'T OFFEND ANYONE!
Laura&Phil
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Re: I'm mad at my FI
I agree that you can try to compromise with light blue vests or something...you can also talk to him calmly and explain that while you think it's sweet that he wants to have the same tuxes as his father (b/c it really is very cute) it's so out of date it will look ridiculous and your guests will be very distracted by the whole thing- taking away some of the day's special meaning.
Honesly tho- go to the tux shop and talk about it with them...I bet once he sees the look on the tux guy's faces and when they ask him why he would ever want to do that (while I'm sure they'll be polite and professionsal- they should be good guides and steer you away from them!) he'll drop the whole idea.
Vendor advice has helped shape my plans for the better and both FH and I have taken turns discovering that our ideas were not practical or problematic. Good vendors can help guide you!! Good luck!!
As for the ring joke, FH and I are very laid back with jokes like that too. I have actually taken my ring off or made twisting motions as if I was taking it off and we both laugh- with the exception of one time. As long as you both know those jokes aren't masking real resentment it's cool.
dianadrw
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Re: I'm mad at my FI
I'm sorry you're having to deal w/ this. I can commiserate because my FH is a little bit quarky as well. While he hasn't asked to wear blue tuxes he has asked for some oddball stuff. But that's him....and that's who I am marrying. The wedding should be a representation of the 2 of us, not just me and my martha stewart weddings ideas. LOL. Anyway, maybe you can suggest a photo table where you have wedding pictures of both sets of parents and even grandparents. This way everyone can get to see his dad in his powder blue glory. Also, I like the ideas the other ladies have given about incorporating blue in other aspects of the wedding -- flowers, dresses, ties, etc. Good luck...I'm sure it will work out.
FruNor
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Re: I'm mad at my FI
Light blue tuxes? Hmmmm. Ok, what about threatening to wear a 80´s style wedding dress....in neon orange?
andri
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Re: I'm mad at my FI
Honestly, I'd be more p'oed about the ring joke than the tuxes. I'd never let DH hold that over my head! If he were me,next time,I'd take it off and gently place it in his hand,no anger..and say'you're right hun,you can have this ring back...I really don't need any outward symbols of our commitment,I love you the same,with or without a piece of jewelry' I know that would devistate my DH,he's probably never joke about it again. I don't know your FI or how he would react,make sure if you're gonna say something like that,you can back it up. I love my ring and it cost my husband a lot of $$$,none of which was my idea,to my surprise..he wanted to spend X amount,but I'll be damned if he'd remind me every once in a while. Besides,theres no ring that can make us even-steven for the amount of pain during childbirth I'll be enduring...hopefully soon..babydust to me
BTW,let him tell a couple of his GM that he's thinking of babyblue...they (not you) will squash that notion!
Laura&Phil
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Re: I'm mad at my FI
Posted by dianadrw
I'm sorry you're having to deal w/ this. I can commiserate because my FH is a little bit quarky as well. While he hasn't asked to wear blue tuxes he has asked for some oddball stuff. But that's him....and that's who I am marrying. The wedding should be a representation of the 2 of us, not just me and my martha stewart weddings ideas. LOL. Anyway, maybe you can suggest a photo table where you have wedding pictures of both sets of parents and even grandparents. This way everyone can get to see his dad in his powder blue glory. Also, I like the ideas the other ladies have given about incorporating blue in other aspects of the wedding -- flowers, dresses, ties, etc. Good luck...I'm sure it will work out.
This is a nice idea too- I like the idea of having the parents wedding pictures at a side table with the guest book or something.
June_Bride_2004
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Re: I'm mad at my FI
I feel so bad for ya sweetie....but I do agree that he will change his mind. Do you know if his father is pressuring him to follow the tradaition or did he just think it would be a nice idea? I wouldn't get myself worked up about it.
nferrandi
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Re: I'm mad at my FI
since you're having a summer wedding maybe the BM dresses can be light blue and the guys can wear blue vests. I think that would be a fair compromise.
i mean this is his day too. is he telling you what dress to where? i mean no offence but if he is really wanting it- i dont know. but dont listen to me i think differently then most bride to be's about their weddings. good luck and i hope he comes through for you if you are really so upset about it.
I happen to agree with you. I think sometimes as brides we forget that it is their day as well. I hope you are able to come to a compromise you will both enjoy.
EJSD2006
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Re: I'm mad at my FI
yes, they are out there. my FH jokingly said he would wear one on our day. i told him he would look like lloyd and harry from dumb and dumber.
