I'm not sure if this is tacky...

apkisles Posted: Jul 14, 2005 04:01 PM

I'm not sure if this is tacky...

My parents received an invite for an engagement party for my cousin who got engaged a year ago and on it they listed where they are registered. I was a little put off by this, am I wrong?

suven Posted: Jul 14, 2005 04:04 PM

Re: I'm not sure if this is tacky...

well, registry info isn't supposed to be in e-party invites.

As for the timing, when are they getting married? If it's still far way, it's fine.

But, if the wedding is soon, and they've already been engaged for a year, they should have skipped the e-party

LMFitz Posted: Jul 14, 2005 04:05 PM

Re: I'm not sure if this is tacky...

According to etiquette - you should not 'expect' gifts from an e-party - so I'd be a bit put-off too. But who doesn't expect them to some degree?

jes81276 Posted: Jul 14, 2005 04:05 PM

Re: I'm not sure if this is tacky...

I got an invite for an e-party with the registry listed as well. I thought it was VERY tacky, and several friends (who had recently been married) said the same things.

apkisles Posted: Jul 14, 2005 04:06 PM

Re: I'm not sure if this is tacky...

Thank you! I was telling my mom this and she said I wasjust saying that since I do not care for them!

jes81276 Posted: Jul 14, 2005 04:07 PM

Re: I'm not sure if this is tacky...

LOL

Jamie&MarkSept.'05 Posted: Jul 14, 2005 04:32 PM

Re: I'm not sure if this is tacky...

My FH and I were engaged a year ago. His family if from MA and mine is from NY. His Mom is having an 'engagement' party for us about a month before the wedding, but it is more like a MA shower since many of the family will not be able to get down to NY for a shower and the wedding...

I don't think she is including any registry info in the invite...

dpli Posted: Jul 14, 2005 04:37 PM

Re: I'm not sure if this is tacky...

I think it is kind of tacky, but I had a few people scold me for not putting them in mine. We weren't really expecting gifts, just a small gathering so the 2 sides of the families could meet before the wedding. I didn't have a shower, though, so I did get some generous gifts from our families.

Etiquette dictates no registry info in engagement party or wedding invitations, but I don't really get annoyed or offended if I get them.

DayBeforeThanksgiving Posted: Jul 14, 2005 04:40 PM

Re: I'm not sure if this is tacky...

I didn't include registry items... but I did do something a little different. On the invitation, it said to visit our website for information on the wedding... amongst the many things on it, there was registry stuff.... so people did buy off the registry, but not because I included it... you know?

Yes, I think it's tacky to include that stuff in the engagement party invite... save that for the shower...

Jennie0898 Posted: Jul 14, 2005 04:44 PM

Re: I'm not sure if this is tacky...

I know ettiquite says you shouln't even bring gifts to an engagement party but knowing what my family is like (they bring gifts to e-parties for the bride and groom) when my parents gave us our e-party they put where we were registered on the invite. I don't think it's terribly tacky. I think it really boils down to your opinion.

neen Posted: Jul 14, 2005 04:57 PM

Re: I'm not sure if this is tacky...

tacky......

Swan06 Posted: Jul 14, 2005 05:05 PM

Re: I'm not sure if this is tacky...

Honestly, before reading all the etiquette books I thought it was okay to get gifts for your engagement party. When I told people not to give us gifts they looked at me like I was crazy. They were like, 'Are you sure?' We ended up getting a lot of gifts anyways because people didn't want to show up empty handed. Maybe your cousin doesn't know that your not suppose to ask for engagement gifts.

FTRBRIDE Posted: Jul 14, 2005 05:07 PM

Re: I'm not sure if this is tacky...

Posted by Jennie0898

I know ettiquite says you shouln't even bring gifts to an engagement party but knowing what my family is like (they bring gifts to e-parties for the bride and groom) when my parents gave us our e-party they put where we were registered on the invite. I don't think it's terribly tacky. I think it really boils down to your opinion.

Agreed. We put our website, not our registry, on our e-party invites. We got our ENTIRE registry, plus $$. Nobody goes to an e-party empty handed...IMO, that would be what's tacky.

apkisles Posted: Jul 14, 2005 05:15 PM

Re: I'm not sure if this is tacky...

I know obviuosly no one would show up without a gift, but I just thought this really a tacky attempt at hitting people up for an extra gift. Showers are for registries, when someone else puts them together. They are throwing this for themselves.

AJsMommy122 Posted: Jul 14, 2005 05:19 PM

Re: I'm not sure if this is tacky...

Posted by Melanie&Jose

Honestly, before reading all the etiquette books I thought it was okay to get gifts for your engagement party. When I told people not to give us gifts they looked at me like I was crazy. They were like, 'Are you sure?' We ended up getting a lot of gifts anyways because people didn't want to show up empty handed. Maybe your cousin doesn't know that your not suppose to ask for engagement gifts.

It's not tacky to get gifts - Its tacky to expect or request them.

If someone wants to buy you a gift there is nothing wrong with that... but it is rude to just put your registry info on an invitation - implying that you expect a gift.

FTRBRIDE Posted: Jul 14, 2005 05:19 PM

Re: I'm not sure if this is tacky...

Posted by apkisles

I know obviuosly no one would show up without a gift, but I just thought this really a tacky attempt at hitting people up for an extra gift. Showers are for registries, when someone else puts them together. They are throwing this for themselves.

Well that's a different story...you didn't say they were hosting the party themselves. Usually people's families or friends host E-parties for the newly engaged couple.