I had to let you girls know what happened. Where should I start. Me and FH have been getting into not fights but we haven't been spending as much time together as I would like. I asked Him to come meet the DJ with me Saturday. He said he couldn't come that he had so much to do on Saturday so I let it go. Then last night he tells me he and his best friends wife( who is having marriage problems) are going out for a night on the town Sunday night. When I start to question him he gets upset and tells me that we shouldn't get married if I question him. He feels he can help her out because she's been telling him what's going on. I don't trust her one bit how come she didn't want to talk to me about her problems Im a women I can understand a lot more than he can . Maybe it is me and I've seen to many episodes of maury what do you guys think.
Butterfly123
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Re: Im ready to kill FH RANT
im sorry but that is not cool. There is no reason your FH should be hanging out with ANY woman without you unless its his mother or another family member. He hasnt spent anytime with you but hes making time to spend it with some other woman. I dont like it one bit.
Browneyesncute
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Re: Im ready to kill FH RANT
That wouldn't sit well with me either
ant n tilde
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Re: Im ready to kill FH RANT
sorry that is unacceptable. if that is something that you plan to tolerate through out your marriage then by all means - keep quiet
however, if you do not want this to continue i would put an end to it immediately
there is a HUGE difference btw trust and stupidity. trust is not worrying about your husband while he is at work and in contact with other women. stupidity is placing a desperate woman into his lap and telling him to have fun.
Soon2beAlberti
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Re: Im ready to kill FH RANT
i think its inappropriate. he needs to make sure his own relationship is 100% in good standing before he goes trying to help someone elses. you're obviously not a happy camper so he should have been with you instead of trying to console somebody else. This disgruntled housewife needs to find somebody else to vent to because going out for a night on the town with your husbands best friend when you are having marriage problems is not a good idea...especially if he is engaged to be married. TEAR HIM A NEW ONE!!!!
ETA: OH HELL NO! <~ sorry but i think this situation deffinately warrants an 'oh hell no'
boky17
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Re: Im ready to kill FH RANT
yeah, not cool...especially if your gut thinks its fishy. If he wants to go so bad, you should be able to go too. That way he can help her out, and spend time with you as well.
bemyyoko
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Re: Im ready to kill FH RANT
Posted by ant n tilde
sorry that is unacceptable. if that is something that you plan to tolerate through out your marriage then by all means - keep quiet
however, if you do not want this to continue i would put an end to it immediately
there is a HUGE difference btw trust and stupidity. trust is not worrying about your husband while he is at work and in contact with other women. stupidity is placing a desperate woman into his lap and telling him to have fun.
well said.
DnellD809
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Re: Im ready to kill FH RANT
That is definitely an time where I would put my foot down. If it makes you uncomfortable then in all honesty he shouldn't be doing it. He should be spending time with you and she should be spending time with HER husband working on their own problems. Maybe you can go along with them?
bluegreen08
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Re: Im ready to kill FH RANT
Posted by Songstress1212
im sorry but that is not cool. There is no reason your FH should be hanging out with ANY woman without you unless its his mother or another family member. He hasnt spent anytime with you but hes making time to spend it with some other woman. I dont like it one bit.
I agree that situation is really sketchy, especially since he's not spending time with YOU. I'd be pissed off too, at you and at her. Even if I trusted him! Maybe ask if you can go along?
However, I disagree that there's no reason FH should ever hang out with another woman without you being there. I have guy friends, and my 'study buddy' at law school is a guy. We don't really 'hang out' outside of school but we talk on AIM/e-mail and when finals roll around we go over practice exams and review together. FH has met him, and study buddy knows I'm engaged. There's nothing there! (We did get kickasss grades last year from it, so I'm glad FH was fine with it)
I don't think that the same situation across the board, but I wouldnt make a blanket statement that its only ok to hang out with the opposite sex if its family. just my opinion though!
bluegreen08
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Re: Im ready to kill FH RANT
Posted by ant n tilde
sorry that is unacceptable. if that is something that you plan to tolerate through out your marriage then by all means - keep quiet
however, if you do not want this to continue i would put an end to it immediately
there is a HUGE difference btw trust and stupidity. trust is not worrying about your husband while he is at work and in contact with other women. stupidity is placing a desperate woman into his lap and telling him to have fun.
I completely agree.
teenigrrl
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Re: Im ready to kill FH RANT
i'm sorry, but i'd have a HUGE problem if FH didn't have time to spend with me, but had time to spend with another woman. if she's having problems w/ her relationship, and she feels your FH is the only one she can speak to, it's called the phone. you have to listen to your gut on this one. it very well may be all innocent. i also think it's wrong of him to call you selfish for wanting to spend time with him, when lately you haven't been. couples need their alone time. you won't survive without it.
luna bride x
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Re: Im ready to kill FH RANT
Posted by Browneyesncute
That wouldn't sit well with me either
i totally agree.
skinny237
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Re: Im ready to kill FH RANT
Posted by teenigrrl
i'm sorry, but i'd have a HUGE problem if FH didn't have time to spend with me, but had time to spend with another woman. if she's having problems w/ her relationship, and she feels your FH is the only one she can speak to, it's called the phone. you have to listen to your gut on this one. it very well may be all innocent. i also think it's wrong of him to call you selfish for wanting to spend time with him, when lately you haven't been. couples need their alone time. you won't survive without it.
I agree. I would also ask FH how he would feel if u did that to him.
Browneyesncute
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Re: Im ready to kill FH RANT
Posted by mlny83
Posted by Browneyesncute
That wouldn't sit well with me either
i totally agree.
and if u know her too why can't u all go out!
GinaBambina08
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Re: Im ready to kill FH RANT
I definitely would not like that, you are not being irrational at all! And I dont' think your FH is stupid enough not to realize that that is completely inappropriate....in situations like these, telling him what to do will not work...he'll just try to play mind games on you, telling you that you're being Jealous or Irrational, or Insecure....
the only thing that would work in this situation, I think, is giving him a taste of his own medicine for a little while...
and i'm sorry, but that woman is pissing me off! Never would I go out with a married man like that, and if I did, I would approach his wife first explaining to her why I NEED to go out with him (and asking her to join us!) Why do they need to go out alone?? I don't like the sound of that at all!
I'm sorry you have to be dealing with this I'm seriously getting upset for you!
Mici n KC
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Re: Im ready to kill FH RANT
Posted by Browneyesncute
Posted by mlny83
Posted by Browneyesncute
That wouldn't sit well with me either
i totally agree.
and if u know her too why can't u all go out!
That's what I'm thinking!
KickinDandelions
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Re: Im ready to kill FH RANT
I totally agree and would be p*ssed. If things with you aren't 100%, he shouldn't be spending the time he could be using to fix your relationship to try to help this other woman. Shouldn't he work on his own problems first before trying to fix others'?
In addition, you said that it's his best friend's wife. Maybe I don't know the situation, but would FH's best friend get mad that FH went out with his wife? Would that make FH's best friend think that FH was being a traitor?
LeeLee111
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Re: Im ready to kill FH RANT
I agree that isnt cool at all. She should be talking to her husband not yours. Why would they go out alone? It would be different if he said we should take her out and talk to her but not him alone. Good luck
LoveRocks
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Re: Im ready to kill FH RANT
I would be really uncomfortable with it and I don't think you are being irrational or selfish at all. She should go to marriage counseling with her husband and not out on the town with your FH if they're having problems.
MrsHtobe
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Re: Im ready to kill FH RANT
Posted by ant n tilde
sorry that is unacceptable. if that is something that you plan to tolerate through out your marriage then by all means - keep quiet
however, if you do not want this to continue i would put an end to it immediately
there is a HUGE difference btw trust and stupidity. trust is not worrying about your husband while he is at work and in contact with other women. stupidity is placing a desperate woman into his lap and telling him to have fun.
Very well said. I would feel the same way. If it bothers you, you need to tell FH now before he thinks that its acceptable down the road. It bothers you and he should be able to understand that.
