FH has been asking me to move in with him for weeks now and I always say I need time to think about it. The truth is, I feel like if I move in with him now, once we are married it wont feel 'special' to us. He has a condo and his maintenance is less then my rent. If I move in with him, he told me I don't have to help him with the bills if I don't want to. I told him I couldnt take him up on this offer. He then said that I could help however I wanted and that way, we'd also be able to save more for the wedding and house we want to buy. I need some opinions please. What should I do?
FutureMrsLehmann
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Re: I'm thinking of moving in with fh...
It's really a personal decision you'll have to make. BUT, I've lived with my FH for over a year now and it's really shown me a lot. Living with someone vs. dating someone is a lot different. You see a lot of things you probably didn't know before. I know some girls don't agree with living with the boyfriend before marriage, which is totally fine, but I feel like you should know all parts of this person that you plan on spending the rest of your life with! I don't think it will make getting married any less special now that we live together.
LnF0405
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Re: I'm thinking of moving in with fh...
i move with FH 2 month ago, and I always had said that I wanted to wait until I get married, but FH and I thought about it money wise, we were paying for 2 separate rent. Now that we live together I really liked because what we do we put the money that I used to use for my rent into the savings account and this is letting us splurge more for the wedding and in a regular basic. At the same time you guy learn more about each other and it will style be special when you get married. ALso with the saving you can afford to buy a house sooner than what you guys where expecting to. HTH
little34
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Re: I'm thinking of moving in with fh...
It is ultimately up to you...but I think that if you were to move in it would still be special...FH and I have been living together for years and I know that when we are husband and wife it will be special....and that way you get all of the getting use to living with each other fighting out of the way because it is a HUGE adjustment...you really don't fully know a person until you live with them!
MRSin2009
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Re: I'm thinking of moving in with fh...
I have lived with my Fh for over a year and I am happy I did it now. I feel if I knew what a slob he was after we got married we would have a hard transitioning point . Its really up to you but I am so for living with the FH before. I feel I got closer to FH living with him.
I think it would be great to be able to save money for the wedding and the house. I say go for it!
If you move in with him now you will have more money for the wedding. Think about it, I would if that was my situation.
FuTuRe MrS MaZz
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Re: I'm thinking of moving in with fh...
i too think its better to move in together first... at least for even 6 months ... def should get adjusted to one another b4 marriage ... fh & i are movin in together next summer
CMS
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Re: I'm thinking of moving in with fh...
It's definitely a personal decision, but I think it makes sense financially to move in together. You can take your rent money and put it towards the wedding (even if you help FH pay half his maintenance, that still leaves extra money for you).
My old boss Jim lived with his wife for four years before they got married and he said a few months after his wedding that you don't think things are going to change, but being married really did for him and he was glad that they didn't just stay living together. So, I think it'll still be special once you get married.
Summertimegal424
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Re: I'm thinking of moving in with fh...
we've lived together for the last two years and i think it only makes it better, we are already ajusted and wont have to work out those first year of marriage kinks like whos gonna shower when, and whos gonna do what
but thats just my personal opinion
i love living with him
ilovedave1119
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Re: I'm thinking of moving in with fh...
i too agree that moving in together before the wedding is not a bad idea. We have lived together for a year and a half and besides it being financially a good decision, we were able to get those first year getting used to eachother kinks out already, and now we are able to just look forward to being husband and wife!
MrsDrinkh20
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Re: I'm thinking of moving in with fh...
agreed..we live together now for almost a year and its the best decision we ever made...i know it wil be special once we are married...no doubt about it..
Aristotelina
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Re: I'm thinking of moving in with fh...
It is a personal decision that you have to make for yourself, BUT, I've lived with FH for almost 2 years now and it's been WONDERFUL and I urge anyone who is thinkingo f getting married to LIVE TOGETHER FIRST!!!!
It will NO DOUBT still be special when you get married and you can do extra things to make it seem even more special..like maybe decorate or re-decorate a room together when you get married or buy a new painting together or something along those lines that you can look forward to after the wedding!
Jflod710
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Re: I'm thinking of moving in with fh...
move in with him!!! I have been living with fh for sometime now and i love it.. its ur decision!
JKFris09
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Re: I'm thinking of moving in with fh...
It's personal and differrent for everyone - for Fh & myself we do not want to move in prior to getting married - we're going to probably buy a house ahead of time but just he is going to move in. For us we want to wait until we're married. But you have to decide what's best for you.
meli722
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Re: I'm thinking of moving in with fh...
i say moving in before marriage gives you a better idea of how itll be when you actually are married....living together and dating are WAY different, you figure out theyre pigs, they dont like to clean up after themselves, they want their food to be set @ the table when they get home....lol or is that just my FH?? i say do whats best for you, but if it is cheaper then i DEF say do it, esp. since you are saving for the wedding right now
Danyell48
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Re: I'm thinking of moving in with fh...
Posted by FutureMrsLehmann
It's really a personal decision you'll have to make. BUT, I've lived with my FH for over a year now and it's really shown me a lot. Living with someone vs. dating someone is a lot different. You see a lot of things you probably didn't know before. I know some girls don't agree with living with the boyfriend before marriage, which is totally fine, but I feel like you should know all parts of this person that you plan on spending the rest of your life with! I don't think it will make getting married any less special now that we live together.
I agree. I moved in with my FH in February and honestly it showed me that we were able to live with eachother. Plus saving money is always good.
NYMetsBride
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Re: I'm thinking of moving in with fh...
Im all about saving money and if it means moving in with him then do it. But ultimately its your opinion.
PreshusSmurf
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Re: I'm thinking of moving in with fh...
Also, as a girl just about to get married in 2 weeks ;jump: ... if you wait until the wedding, things will be much more hectic closer to the wedding.
If you chose to take the leap now, you will have time to get settled living together before the craziness sets in closer to the wedding.
But it is a very personal choice, you need to be sure you want to do that now .... you seem not so sure you want to take that step before the wedding.
FH & I lived together for a few years before the wedding, and I love coming home to him, and going to sleep every night with him by my side.
lookitscassie
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Re: I'm thinking of moving in with fh...
Fh and I moved in togheter after 5 months of dating. its all about when its right for you. Just because you're not married yet doesnt mean it won't be special. It will save money for the wedding which is great. If you are paying for it yourself thats definatly something you might want to think about
egem523
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Re: I'm thinking of moving in with fh...
I do not officially live with FH although he stays almost every nigth with me. I always said I did not want to move in with him before get married because I cared about what my family would think, and I thought we will have nothing to look forward too when we get married. But I was wrong It has been a good learning experience because I know what to except when we get married.
