My future in-laws haven't helped out financially at all for my wedding. I really didn't care at first because I took the stance that I am better off because all of the decisions I make will be mine and so on.... But as the wedding gets closer, I am getting a little pissed. FH has 2 older married brothers whose wives parents could afford paying the whole thing. My parents can't. Are anyone else's in-laws not helping at all?
CubanBride
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Hmmm,
my FH's mother hasn't contributed yet to the wedding...but she did buy us a new refrigerator. LOL!
Honestly, we are paying for everything oursleves because it's easier not to depend on others. As you can see, it causes problems.
nylisa
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My FILs are not contributing to the wedding at all. They gave us our gift early so that we could use it towards the wedding but it was nothing compared to what my parents are spending. FI & I are paying for most of it but my parents are helping us out with alot.
TwoBugs
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My ILs aren't helping at all, but I'm okay with that. They aren't in a situation where they can (financially). Like you said, the bright side is that we don't have to listen to their opinions!
Kriss2c
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My FILs are not helping at all. Of course, they themselves barely have a pot to, well, you know how that goes. It doesn't bother me only because I know their situation.
I will say this though, I sent out my invites recently and my mom's name is on it because she's paying the lion's share of the wedding, if FIL complain one iota about their names not being on it, I WILL let them have it.
cluelessbride
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We didn't expect any financial help from either set of parents. I think it is generous if they can help, but not to be expected.
CubanBride
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Posted by cluelessbride
We didn't expect any financial help from either set of parents. I think it is generous if they can help, but not to be expected.
agreed
Corduroy94
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My future in laws are divorced and the FMIL is refusing to put a penny in. Fortunatly my parents can afford a good portion of the bill & we're paying the rest. My FFIL is paying for the rehersal dinner. My FMIL says she shouldn't have to pay for anything because she's from out of town & she won't know anyone. It bothers me SO much! She's willing to give us a $5k reception in her town after our NY one but wont even shop of our Fortunoff's registry - its to pretentious for her.
Don't worry - you're not alone!! A lot of us feel your pain!! FM if you ever need to talk!
mariecam
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The truth is, my in-laws are not rich, and I really didn't expect anything from them. FH and I are paying the bulk and my parents are helping. I guess I was just thinking, you know, it would have been a nice gesture to even offer something. I am feeling the financial pressure, and I would love the help. Some of my girlfriends are pumping me up, too asking me if they have contributed, and when I say no, they get me fired up. I know it will all work out in the end, but some days make my stomach twisted up when I think about paying for everything. I'm really not a brattyor selfish bride...I'mjust stressed a bit.
mariecam
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Posted by Corduroy94
My future in laws are divorced and the FMIL is refusing to put a penny in. Fortunatly my parents can afford a good portion of the bill & we're paying the rest. My FFIL is paying for the rehersal dinner. My FMIL says she shouldn't have to pay for anything because she's from out of town & she won't know anyone. It bothers me SO much! She's willing to give us a $5k reception in her town after our NY one but wont even shop of our Fortunoff's registry - its to pretentious for her.
Don't worry - you're not alone!! A lot of us feel your pain!! FM if you ever need to talk!
Thanks Corduroy94
cluelessbride
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I just saw that you are getting married at St. Marys!!!!!!!!!!! We were going to but we moved to LI!
My FH made his communion and confirmation with Fr. Doyle about 2 years ago.
St. Marys is SOOOOOOO beautiful!!
Did you know Al Capone was either married or baptized there?
FLaCaTaCa
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My In-Laws are not contributing to the wedding. They feel they shouldn't because tradition is that the Bride's parents pay...THOSE DAYS ARE OVER!!!!! My parents are helping us as much as they can. My in-laws are paying for the rehearsal dinner because traditionally that is all they 'are supposed to do' Oh well...as Lady Princess says 'My Day, My Way'
charlotte227
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my inlaws have not helped nor do we want them to...oh but guess what they're calling now and we have like 37 days to go...yes they're for real....good luck
nov04LIbride
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Posted by TwoBugs
My ILs aren't helping at all, but I'm okay with that. They aren't in a situation where they can (financially). Like you said, the bright side is that we don't have to listen to their opinions!
Same here. Paying for rehearsal though. It's hard, my dad is giving nothing, my mom tries to help out with what she can but I feel so guilty because she doesn't have much and wants to retire soon. I don't want to make it that she has to continue to work longer for this. Honestly I wish my FH contributed--he hasn't managed to save a penny and has been no help with the $.
vhollo01
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My FIL's are broke....are only giving $5k AND they are still making demands about the guests they want to invite. They offered to pay extra for the people they want. So they have caused more fightes during this engagement time than I've ever had with FH in all the time we dated. Now they are kind of giving us both the cold shoulder because we stood our ground about having our wedding our way if we are the ones paying.
Pattili
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Bascially, my FI and & are paying for most of the wedding. My mom gave us a set amount of money. His father (my future father-in-law) will be giving us the same amount of money he gave his two other kids when they got married. We asked for the money before hand for deposits and what not. He said, and i quote 'Absolutely NOT. You'll get the money 2 days after the wedding and not before'. What kind of garbage is this. I mean, yes the money will be helpful whenever we get it, but we could really use the money now in trying to pay for everything. Oh well..
Russo'sbride
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My in-laws have not given us anything (except for engagement party gift) or offered yet. My parents are helping out as much as they can. But if they do plan on giving us something it would be nice to know so I know how much we should budget.
AJsMommy122
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My inlaws havent helped with the wedding at all. The only thing my fil's offered to pay for was the favors ( but thats b/c she didnt want me to give something 'cheap' out and embarass her lol) Im not offended. I dont expect them to pay for anything. My parents arent helping either except that my mother paid for my dress.
fall2005bride
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my FIL'S haven't offered any type of help either... they didn't even show up at the engagement party, that my parents gave us.(even though they RSVP'd with a yes)
It's to the point where I had to send them a STD for the wedding cause they 'forgot' our wedding date!
they are trash and I try not to aggrevate my self over it anymore.
If you need to talk about the terrors of FIL's, FM me anytime....
keljoe04
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I'm glad to see I'm not alone. My Fh and I are paying for most of the wedding on our own. My mom gave us a set amount and paid for my dress. She has helped me out more than I could ask for....but my FILs haven't offered anything. My FH had to finally ask them to pay for the rehearsal dinner.
