In the need to vent :(

So lately FH has been really upsetting me, is NWR it actually has to do with our relationship. Let me refresh your memories...FH Sister in law and Bro are weird (they sometimes dont say hi or when they do i feel like they are forced to because FH is present, FH know this but everytime i try to talk about it and let him know how it bothers me, he tries to dismiss the conversation or tells me not to make it a big deal) Anyways, one night i was speaking with FH and he was telling me about how his sister's mother in law does not like her and how it pisses him off. So i started thinking, hmmm, and i told him 'interesting how it pisses you off that your sister's mother in law doesnt like your sister even though your not present and cant actually see the EVIDENCE that your sister's mother in law dont like her' my point: how was he able to trust his sister about a statement and not me when i would tell him about his fam? He was understandable when it came to his sis but he wouldnt want to hear about it when i would tell him that his bro and sis in law were very weird to me especially when he wasnt around and he stayed quiet. YES ladies, he found it interesting.

TODAY, he was telling me about how his best friend told him some things that opened his eyes and decided to change certain things (something that has to do with soemthing) lol...now i am really upset because the same thing that his best friend told him, I've been telling him for MONTHS!!!! (and YES he would dismiss the topic and tell me not to worry about it) FOR MONTHS!!! did i say FOR MONTHS?!! So i told him (at this point i am very upset) that why everytime i would tell him soemthing he would try to change topic or say things like dont worry about it; stop making it a big deal and when other people would tell him the same thing, he was understandable and open to it, and actually do soemthing about it :( of course it lead to an arguement and i dont think he was seeing my point and i told him that it was better to talk later, so i hung up. sighhhh...

i am so upset cause i want to tell him things without him trying to dismiss the conversation or making me feel like im a drama queen. it gets me upset that when other people tell him the exact same thing is OK not a problem but for some reason when i tell him is a problem =(

sorry if it doesnt make sense, i am just so upset and letting my thoughts flow...

In the need to vent :(

I'm sorry you're dealing with this. Don't apologize for venting. We are here to listen.

In the need to vent :(

Hey don't let it get to you... Too much :) I do the same thing with my FW(? I'm new, so I haven't figured out all the acronyms yet). Yes I'm the token FH on the site.

Just talk to him and tell him how you feel (rationally please, hold back the yelling for now). Just let him know you feel like your thoughts are neglected and makes you feel like he doesn't care, especially when he takes someone else's word over your own.

In the need to vent :(

Some people don't like hearing the truth when it comes to something negative about their family. In your case, your FH might find it difficult hearing from you that his brother and sister in law are rude people. HOWEVER, when it comes to his sister, he gets defensive about her MIL because he wants to protect her. Obviously I'm not saying he doesn't care about what you have to say--it might just be more difficult to swallow since it is about his family. I know if someone says something bad about my family (whether it's true or not) I immediately get defensive.
I have a crazy uncle who has had a drug problem for years. I can talk negatively about him all I want but once FH brings something up about my uncle, I get a little nuts.
I'm not sure what his friend told you, and it isn't my business. But maybe it was more clear to him when a second party told him the same thing you did. Maybe he didn't want to believe it..but then once another person told him, it became a reality. I hope this is making sense.
Normally, when things like this come up with me and my FH, I like to take a step back and kind of evaluate the situation. Something similar happened with us where I said something about how one of his friends might be cheating on his girlfriend. He said I didn't know them well enough to make that judgement. He was completely right, but turned out that a few months later he found out that his friend was actually cheating. He then turns around and said 'Can you believe this!?' YES! I CAN! BECAUSE I TOLD YOU IT WAS HAPPENING!! I didn't make it into a 'told you so' situation. However, I did stand my ground and make it known that I told him this in the past.
I don't even think this helped you, but just know that you aren't dealing with a situation that no one else has gone through. Be rational when talking to him and you won't look like a drama queen.
Also, listen to the token FH above. He kind of said what I was trying to say but in less words!!

In the need to vent :(

That got submitted before I was done, haha.

Also, don't take it personally, guys hear everything their woman says to them. There's just often a lot we hear and sometimes we don't see it directly the same way at first. We understand and believe you, but sometimes an external force (person) helps us realize it better, nothing personal, we just didn't realize the extent.

Oh and Bump +1 what Ro said above. Everyone takes a blind eye to their own fam's issues.

In the need to vent :(

Thanks ladies in a way you're right. I just needed to let it out bc it was annoying me. I want to feel free and tell him things rather stay quiet bc I know what he is going to say. We just spoke and apologized. (We don't yell at each other lol) thanks girls for taking the time and read my stuff, even if it doesn't make sense or nwr...thanks girls!