Inviting work people

I have not had to deal with this yet but I was invited to a wedding of a coworker. She only invited people she was close with and worked with a lot. I was in the 'close with' category.

She had 2 tables of work people (with dates/spouses). It was about 14 people total.

The interesting thing is she did get gifts from a lot of people at work that were not invited. At least I know a couple of people planned to send her things from her registry since they asked me where she was registered. She registered for Honey Money and I know a friend of mine (not invited) bought $100 in honey money.

I only plan to invite the people that I'm close with from work - 10 + spouses/dates.

ETA - when I say close with I mean people that I hang out with outside of work. Not after work events but actual social events that are unrelated to work. I am inviting my poker group (mostly people from my firm or who previously worked at my firm) and a few other friends from the office --- a few of the attorneys, a couple of paralegals that I hang out with outside of work, my assistant and some of the other secretaries.

If I tried to invite everyone from work that thinks we are 'close' because we attend after work functions or firm sponsored events, I have to invite 100+ people.

I only invited co-workers that I talk to or hang out with outside of work. It's basically one table.

honestly, i think work people can be very undersatnding of these things. i am inviting 5 of 15 people, and everyone kind of knows. They all still keep asking about registry info and stuff and are excited to get me a gift and congratulate me on everything!

I think everyone kind of knows who will be invited and who won't be invited if there is a subset of people from work that you hang out with away from the office.

They can't all expect to be invited knowing the expense of a wedding in NY. And I'm sure they know you can't exclude family members to invite coworkers.

ETA - if all else fails tell them the hall has a max of 132 people (including vendors) and although you would love to, you just can't invite all of them.

I am having a tough time with this too. I have worked at this law firm for five years and have seen it grow from a 12 person office (pretty much all women) to over 30..I will likely invite the partners, associate attorneys, office manager and a few other people in my department...including spouses that is 18

one thing to consider is if you invite people with spouses...the spouses don't necessarily come (I noticed this at one office wedding I was invited too)

my other concern is, now must I invite them to the bridal shower????

Good question!

Well IMO..I think you can do this one of two ways. First if the issue is too many people are invited and there is limited space. I would try an A and B list option. I would place the coworkers on the B list. When you start to receive your regrets from the A list you can add another coworker and then when you have enough regrets then send out all their invites at the same time. (This could be tricky). You would need to send out your invitations at least 6 weeks in advance and hopefully two-three weeks later you can send out your B list.

Another option is to invite only the close coworkers and pull them to the side and tell them not to say anything to the others. This may be a little akward though.

I work for a big company, but in my department there are about 10 people. I am only inviting my boss, my former boss (works in another dept now, but I worked for him for a long time) and those who I am close w/. I know I will be leaving people out, but I cannot invite everyone & aside from bosses, I don't feel that I should be obligated to invite those who I am not close w/ - and why would they want to be there? There is one person that I get along w/ because I have to, but the thought of having her at my wedding makes me sick lol!!! Do what you have to & everyone will get over it.

I have been at my office for 4 years and most think I am going on a destination wedding. And I am glad I will not have to invite any of them Because it looks bad.