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Is anyone choosing not to breast feed?

Original post by jennbaby

jennbaby Posted:

Re: Is anyone choosing not to breast feed?

I feel now I will NOT breast feed, but then again, who knows, when the time comes, I may change my mind.

melissa27 Posted:

Re: Is anyone choosing not to breast feed?

I never really thought much about this topic...until I got pregnant of course! I couldn't really picture myself breastfeeding...but because my hubby is becoming a doctor and is kinda gung-ho about being 'healthy' I decided to try it. And...so far it's great! But, as the nurses in the hospital told me...

**Everyone thinks breastfeeding is so 'natural' and should come easily...NOT SO. It's HARD work, and takes a lot of patience to do it. **

This is so true. The first few days of BFing were impossible, Lyndsey would not latch on, and I was a crying mess. It was super frustrating. But now that she and I have gotten the hang of it, it's MUCH easier. It is extremely demanding though, and sometimes I wonder what I have gotten myself into... I am trying to pump so that my husband can feed her also, but I am not liking it. It takes forever.

Breastfeeding is not for everyone...I can definitely see why people would choose not to do it. I feel like a milk machine right now. LOL Lyndsey will eat at 12pm...it takes her an hour to complete a feeding...then she wants to eat again at 2pm!! YIKES. I don't have any time to do anything...including pee!

Basically, whether or not you are going to BF is completely a personal choice. Do not feel bad if it's not for you! Hey, I was a formula fed baby, and I turned out just fine!
shamma Posted:

Re: Is anyone choosing not to breast feed?

thanks Melissa

natasha Posted:

Re: Is anyone choosing not to breast feed?

I plan to breast feed when I get a child. I am not sure for how long. That will determined when i get to that point.

bearsbabe_113 Posted:

Re: Is anyone choosing not to breast feed?

I agree with Claud and feel it is a very personal decision that only you, as the mother, can make. I watched my sister go through heLL in the hospital and then when she first went home, because my BIL INSISTED she BF because it's 'healthier' and my nephew wasn't taking to her milk and she wasn't producing enough of it. I told my BIL that when he grew breasts, then he could make that speech, but it wasn't for him to make now!!! After many arguments, he finally gave in after the dr. told them to stop it and give this poor baby formula.

I am not going to BF for several reasons (one being medical and the other being that I will be going back to work and feel it will be unfair to have to wean the baby off so quickly, plus I'm not pumping in the bathroom at work) and I refuse to let anybody make me feel 'less of a mother' because of it. Most of us grew up as formula babies and I think we did alright for ourselves, and nowadays it can only be better!

Like Michele said, we should just support each other in whatever choice we make in how we feed our babies.

Hugs to all the mommies, BFers and formula feeders!!!!
shamma Posted:

Re: Is anyone choosing not to breast feed?

I just called to ask my mom if I was breastfed
shamma Posted:

Re: Is anyone choosing not to breast feed?

She said for a little bit, 3 weeks
NIHA Posted:

Re: Is anyone choosing not to breast feed?

My mom bf both my sister and I for about 1 year. Even though we were born at a time where formula was more popular, I guess her being from India had something to do with her choice. I will my best to bf for about 1 year also.

LaurenDM Posted:

Re: Is anyone choosing not to breast feed?

It's a completely personal choice, and I don't think anyone should be thought of as being a 'bad' mother if she doesn't want to breastfeed. Personally, I've decided not to breastfeed, and thank goodness my husband is not trying to convince me otherwise.

shamma Posted:

Re: Is anyone choosing not to breast feed?

I asked her why for such a short period? she said the Dr told her her breast milk was no good, who knows what this Dr was thinking, I am now wondering if its b/c she was 16

I think people in our society tend to think their ideas/opinions on our lives are more important than what we feel. From how to raise our children to how to plan our wedding, it would not be life if we did not hear how other people think how we should do it.
orange orange Posted:

Discouraging BF

Completely agree with this being a personal choice. I hope to be successful in doing so with my next child.

I can say that with my 1st child I was discouraged. It had everything to do with age. I say that with certainty because follow-up doctor's visits entailed short, minimal answers and often times included students. I was able to speak up for myself and get my questions answered, but it was a struggle to gain respect as a mother or to get those darn students out of the room. I did not enjoy being considered a push over or a guineapig.

I was 14. In the hospital I was first handed my son with a bottle in his mouth. Noone asked me if I wanted to BF. When I said I preferred to try BF, the nurses told me it was alot of work and wasn't always successful. They said they were too busy to show me until the next day and besides, he already had been bottle fed twice. I tried on my own and eventually found the nurse, litterally huffing and puffing, offering to instruct me.

It was a struggle, but I will try again. And I am looking forward to the changing times and social acceptance of BF mothers. As well as the accepting women of those who choose, or don't 'choose', but have to bottle feed.
NIHA Posted:

Re: Discouraging BF

Wow, that's horrible that happened to you, I'm sorry that the nurses disrespected you in that way. I've heard way too many stories of babies being formula fed in the hospital without a mother's consent. I've heard that women are so concerned about this happening that they make signs that say 'Breastfed Baby' or 'No formula' and tape them outside their rooms. Very sad.

michele31 Posted:

Re: Discouraging BF

In all honestly I can see why they do not encourage 14 or 16 year old girls to BF. It is hard enough to adjust to motherhood at that age (any age, I know) and then not to be able to have any help feeding the baby would be an added stress. I am NOT saying it is fair to the young mother but I can understand why they think a bottle would be easier.
Also, ALL patients should be treated with respect regardless of age, race, religion or reason for being in the hospital. There is NEVER an excuse for rudeness!
shamma Posted:

Re: Discouraging BF

I think some of the women that call themselves nurses should quit, they do not desrve the title. They make good nurses look bad. What does age have to do with anything, its a woman's choice.
michele31 Posted:

Re: Discouraging BF

I don't think that all nurses are good, just like teachers- some need to move on and find something new to do. BUT I think at a young age Shamma caring for a child is not the same as when you are older. Yes, the physical stuff is the same but there are so many factors involved. My best friend had her daughter at 18 and it is very different than me having my first child at 33. BF SHOULD be offered to ALL mothers, of course, but I can understand why a young girl might not be encouraged.

orange orange Posted:

Don't want to argue this point....

but have to say it sticks in my throat each time I hear logic to not encourageing young mothers to BF. I worry expectations are lowered. If these young women are able to give birth, they should be able to partake in other motherly duties. BF or not, maturity or not, financially competent or not, certain responsibilities (not just BF) come with parenting.

Everyone is entitled to their opinion. That includes us as well as those in the health care profession or other pockets of society. I can understand the need to foster additional help and instruction for these responsibilities, which can be taxing (pun intended), but not discouraging them altogether.... that is irresponsible.
shamma Posted:

Re: Don't want to argue this point....

r&theb I feel you 100%

NIHA Posted:

Re: Don't want to argue this point....

I have to disagree Michele. I don't think that just because a woman/girl is very young, that she should not be encouraged to bf. Yes, maybe she has more going on and other difficulties to cope with, however I don't think that the chance for bonding with her child through bfding should be taken away from her. She should be educated and encouraged just like any other woman. If it doesn't work out, fine. But, if she can give birth, then she should be able to bf. I think if OB staff do something like this, they are totally making a decision for her, and taking away her right.

michele31 Posted:

Re: Don't want to argue this point....

Also, consider the YEAR that this all happened? Most women even 10 years ago were NOT encouraged to BF. It may have a lot more to do with WHEN you gave birth, rather then your age. My mother was taught that BF was a sign that a mother couldn't afford formula so no one she knew would have ever done it!
I am NOT saying not to educate ALL mothers. Of course it is your choice as a mother how to feed your child. I am just saying that 'pushing' the issue or making them feel guilty about not wanting to with a very young mother would be unfair to them. In the end the decision should always be left up to the women!
MichelleW Posted:

Re: Don't want to argue this point....

A friend of mine just had quite the opposite experience. The nursing staff made her feel GUILTY because she chose not to BF

It is what youare comfortable with

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