Is anyone else catching flack for wanting nice wedding?

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Posted by Sassyz75
When they came to our wedding, they did think it was over the top and showy- because it's not their culture and way of doing things.

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Posted by kdrainey

Thanks so much ladies. I am computerless at my dad's house and at my mom's now using her computer.

FI and I are totally ignoring everyone's opinions and doing what we want. We decided to just pick a hall and cut the list to the most important guests. FI says if they come, fine, if not, fine since we wanted to go to Mexico anyway but many of them complained about that - and the $1500 per person to stay at the inclusive resort we picked for 3 days.

It is 5 -6 hours but it's our wedding. Mym mom, sister and best friend all went to look at gowns tonight and the woman helping us suggested some hall in VA (as if I asked) and I told her we are getting married in NY. Even this total stranger had an opinion.


Whatever. At this point I am telling everyone if they are not paying, do not give me any advice.

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Posted by blushingbridetobe

Sorry you are going through this. Your family probably does not want to see you go in debt over a wedding. Also people in other states don't have wedding like we do on LI so it is harder for them to understand.

Personally if you can't afford it - then I wouldn't have it. You can have a beautiful wedding without spending $100pp.

Lots of luck to you.

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Posted by kdrainey

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Posted by blushingbridetobe

Sorry you are going through this. Your family probably does not want to see you go in debt over a wedding. Also people in other states don't have wedding like we do on LI so it is harder for them to understand.

Personally if you can't afford it - then I wouldn't have it. You can have a beautiful wedding without spending $100pp.

Lots of luck to you.

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Oh no, don't get me wrong. We are not going into debt for a wedding. I am concerned about partying with my savings but we have the money already - at least based on my estimates. We are not paying with credit.

My stepsister paid $60K for about 220 people at the Swan Club in June 2003 and she said she is still paying off the wedding.

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Posted by justshir

omg! you are so not alone in this! once our families found out about the wedding they blasted their opinions and 'suggestions' at us! it's inevitable that our reception's food has to be chinese and let's face it.. chinese restaurants' decor is distastefully done. well, at least to me so we wanted a nicer chinese restaurant like Shun Lee (east side) or even Mr K's which price range is a drastic difference to a regular chinese restaurant. but really.. scott and i wanted a really teeny tiny wedding. we can't take big weddings.. we shy away from them BUT our parents were set on it. from the chinese traditions, the date and the people we should invite... argh! it all got out of hand. this wasn't much of a compromise but we decided to split the wedding into two different dates. it was the only solution we were able to come up with to shut everyone up.
wedding date one: ceremony and reception for 20ppl.
wedding date two: traditional reception with all the fixings for 300ppl - OYE! and tackkkky!

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Posted by nferrandi

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Posted by kdrainey

Oh no, don't get me wrong. We are not going into debt for a wedding. I am concerned about partying with my savings but we have the money already - at least based on my estimates. We are not paying with credit.

My stepsister paid $60K for about 220 people at the Swan Club in June 2003 and she said she is still paying off the wedding.

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WHOA!!! That's ALOT of money for the Swan Club.

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Posted by kissy27

definately not alone on this one...My dad said the same thing to FH when we first got engaged...He would rather see us take the $$ we are spending on the wedding & spend it on a house...The thing is, FH & I are happy with what we are doing...We both stated when we started planning that we did not want to spend $40,000 on only 5 hours...We have stuck to our guns & got what was the most important to us..

Everyone will have opinion but as people have said, learn to tune them out! As long as FH & you are happy & agree on it, that is all that matters!

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Posted by soon2bmrsp06

you are not alone hun lol
i get it all the time
my dad said 'why are you going to waste all that money on one night , why dont you have the wedding somwhere close to home'( im sorry i dont want to have it close to home i do not like the halls (for a wedding)
and besides im paying for it so what does he care .. but the funny thing is- he has paid for all the down payments and the extras that i wanted (and he siad don't waste money on one night - hey im not you are lol)

then i have the people at work -you are young why dont you buy a house instead of a big wedding have something small -----mind your business i'll do what i want!!!!!!!!!!

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Posted by Butterflybride

Though FH and I aren't paying that much pp, we want to pay for a lot of extra things; videographer, butterflies for a butterfly release, ect and our parents are giving us a lot of grief for that. They're especially giving us grief for spending so much money on a honeymoon. Our theory, you only have one honeymoon. It's frustrating when people give you crap for doing what you want to do.

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Posted by Lori0517

do what you want and please yourself, I am learning that. people ask questions and give their opinions no matter what. If you want something and something thinks its dumb or impractical, well that is their opnion as long as your not asking them to pay for it. my mistake is i am trying to make everyone happy but enough of that i will make myself and FH's day the way we want it. If we want to mortgage our lives well that is our business. I have made the mistake of telling people what things cost too and I have learned my lesson with that.

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