Is it wrong to say no?

I have a female relative on my fiances side of the family who he asked me to make a part of my wedding party. Out of respect to him I did so but couldn't care less if she was in my bridal party or not. She is also engaged and planning her wedding. I have a strong feeling she will ask me to be her bridesmaid.. or maybe even her maid of honor.
I really dont want to do it. Is it really rude if I say no?? ( I would give some type of excuse like I cant afford it)

Re: Is it wrong to say no?

Being in a bridal party can be a delicate thing. If you don't feel right about it, say NO. There's nothing wrong with politely declining a request to be in her BP. Far worse would be for you to say yes and not meet her 'expectations' of you as a BM.

Re: Is it wrong to say no?

I'm sure if she is planning a wedding of her own then she'll know that it's hard to be in a wedding and plan your own. It seems like she wants to be in yours more than you want to be in hers. Wait to see if she asks you and honestly tell her that your honored but it's too much for you to do right now.

Re: Is it wrong to say no?

you can say no...she may be upset or she just may be 'returning the favor'..but im sure either way she'll get over it!

Re: Is it wrong to say no?

No, its not wrong. Im in a similar postion where I was asked to be a BM for a good friend but I do have to decline. I just had my best friends wedding where I was a BM and my FSIL's in August 04..a BM.
My reasons are more towards the time and money that I wont have and as a BM, there are certain responsibilites to fulfill and If Icouldnt, I would feel terrible. Plus, Im trying to save for a wedding. I feel bad for saying 'NO'....but the one who asked should be understanding and fine with whatever you choose.

Good Luck!

Re: Is it wrong to say no?

My sister-in law said to me 'I m so excited about being in your wedding'. I only met her twice and I didn't care for her. Out of respect to my fiance and his family I spoke to him about it and he said that it was a good idea to have her in the bridal party. You never know, if you don't you may upset his family. I would speak to your FH and se what he thinks about it, that is the best way. Good luck with that.

Re: Is it wrong to say no?

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Posted by Sweetd

My sister-in law said to me 'I m so excited about being in your wedding'. I only met her twice and I didn't care for her. Out of respect to my fiance and his family I spoke to him about it and he said that it was a good idea to have her in the bridal party. You never know, if you don't you may upset his family. I would speak to your FH and se what he thinks about it, that is the best way. Good luck with that.

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Thats what I have been thinking. I dont know if it will upset my fiance too much but I know his parents will be very very upset.

Re: Is it wrong to say no?

It stinks, it really does and it's not fair because it is your choice and your wedding. This is why I have 6 bridesmaids and 2 jr. Bridesmaids, I had to have three out of my four nieces (one's only two). I really wanted to have just one friend, my two sister's and one niece. It adds up and everyone puts their two cents in about who you have to have.
That is family for you. You really have to do the right thing. Only if your FH says that it will make his parents upset and he speaks to them and asks them what they think. If they say, that it's no big deal, then great! But, I would get their input.

Re: Is it wrong to say no?

I would much rather that one of my BM's was honest and said she couldn't be a part of the wedding then not be into it and do it half-a$$ed.