It's been a long time ladies, but I have an enormous problem....(LONG)

It's been a long time ladies, but I have an enormous problem....(LONG)

Re: It's been a long time ladies, but I have an enormous problem....(LONG)

Seriously Colleen - my grandmother is going through the EXACT same thing.

It's nobody's decision but your own. As much as you think you need to pacify your parents b/c they're going through such a hard time - this is really about you and your FH.

Your brother may be your brother forever, but your fiance is going to be your husband. If the tables were reversed, you would want your fiance to side with you.

It sounds as if you don't even want your brother in the party either. Don't give in Colleen. Your fiance would remember this for years.

As much as it hurts to see your parents in this situation - your father is absolutely right - it was THEIR decision to do what they did. Your brother is not to blame for a decision they made. It's the truth.

Stay strong Colleen, it's not up to you to please everyone. This is YOUR wedding, YOUR future, YOUR life.

Re: It's been a long time ladies, but I have an enormous problem....(LONG)

This is a really tough one. It's terrible because it sounds like your FH really has no choice, if you try and convince him and he says no then your father is going to speak to him. In my most honest opinion, I think it is wrong for your father to be involved at all. No matter how much he disagrees with your FH's decision it's not his wedding. It really puts your FH in a tough position. I would try and speak to FH one more time but it sounds like he feels strongly about his choice and I would politely tell your father that it is not his place to tell your FH what to do for HIS wedding.

Re: It's been a long time ladies, but I have an enormous problem....(LONG)

Re: It's been a long time ladies, but I have an enormous problem....(LONG)

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Posted by LuvMyAlfonse

Seriously Colleen - my grandmother is going through the EXACT same thing.

It's nobody's decision but your own. As much as you think you need to pacify your parents b/c they're going through such a hard time - this is really about you and your FH.

Your brother may be your brother forever, but your fiance is going to be your husband. If the tables were reversed, you would want your fiance to side with you.

It sounds as if you don't even want your brother in the party either. Don't give in Colleen. Your fiance would remember this for years.

As much as it hurts to see your parents in this situation - your father is absolutely right - it was THEIR decision to do what they did. Your brother is not to blame for a decision they made. It's the truth.

Stay strong Colleen, it's not up to you to please everyone. This is YOUR wedding, YOUR future, YOUR life.

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i honestly and totally agree. if fh really doesn't want him in the wedding, then it's his call. your dad also should respect that and stay out of it. JMO. Honestly my sisters are not all in my wedding - only one is because she is my MOH and I really didn't want a bridal party. they are okay with it and your brother should understand and respect your fh's wishes
good luck sorry you are dealing with this

Re: It's been a long time ladies, but I have an enormous problem....(LONG)

I'm so sorry that you are going through this. try talking to FH first. but tell him the whole thing. good luck!!! but remember that this is your day it should be how you really want it.

Re: It's been a long time ladies, but I have an enormous problem....(LONG)

first i want to say that I am so sorry your family is going through all this

Now heres my whole thing about it, you weren't asked to be in your brothers BP and weren't asked to be god mother to his child. He didn't take you into consideration regarding such matters so i don't see why they expect you to. Did you tell your dad 'HELLO, he didn't ask me to be in his bp'

I always say that the siblings should be in a bp but if your FH hates your brother then that is a different story. I don't think your fh should fake it up there and having somebody by his side that he dislikes.

The best solution would be for all of you to resolve your problems and for your FH to like your brother but if that doesn't happen then don't feel forced to do anything you don't want to do.

Talk to your parents and your brother and calmly explain to them how you feel. I think asking him to do a reading like you mentioned sounded like a good idea.

again, to me what stands out is that he didn't ask you to be in his BP so i can't understand why he would get mad now.

Re: It's been a long time ladies, but I have an enormous problem....(LONG)

Thanks girls. This whole thing just really f-en *****. I think I should approach Fh first. Then talk it over with my dad. What ***** the most is my parents not being able to enjoy their first child having a wedding and getting married. Plus they live in SI, so I've been doing this whole thing alone, and sometimes it really gets to me.

Re: It's been a long time ladies, but I have an enormous problem....(LONG)

Do what want...if you really dont want him in the BP then dont. This day is about you and FH! I dont really know what to say other than that. I hope it works out! good luck hun!!