Its venting time again

jennbaby Posted: Sep 09, 2002 07:46 PM

Its venting time again

ugghhhh!!!

Thrilled Posted: Sep 09, 2002 07:51 PM

Re: Its venting time again

I'm sorry, Jenn! That's a tough position to be in. I totally sympathize with you. I don't even know what to say!

V&S03 Posted: Sep 09, 2002 07:59 PM

Re: Its venting time again

You kind of just have to accept it, unfortunately it's out of your hands. You just have to know that everyone will still be there for you and if she's not it was her decision. It's a tough situation because if you say something you'll seem like the bad guy and you'll seem selfish. I guess having a baby was important to her it's just the timing is bad. Don't let one person upset you like this, it's really not worth it. Your gonna end up ruining the enjoyment that you should be experiencing now as you plan for your big day.

Diane Posted: Sep 09, 2002 08:00 PM

Re: Its venting time again

That is a tough call. One of my BM was pregnant, and was due a month and a half before my wedding. I was so happy for her, but was a little nervous that she was going to be due around my wedding date, but she had her baby in the end of June, and my wedding was Aug. 17th. She was worried that she would look fat, but she looked so good. Like I said it is a tough call, because this is your day, but its tough to look at it in her shoes. I wish you the best.

jennbaby Posted: Sep 09, 2002 08:02 PM

Re: Its venting time again

my moh is also TTC and she even skipped the month from trying so she wouldn't be 9 months, or give birth at my wedding.
now thats a friend!
fmil said something already, so she seems like the bad guy.
i just needed to vent, theres only so much venting i can do to FMIL.

Kathi Posted: Sep 09, 2002 08:33 PM

Re: Its venting time again

I usually don't respond to these posts since they're full of emotion, BUT... maybe I'm responding because my sister just had her 2nd baby 5 days ago. A life that took 7+ years to create. I would have been THRILLED if my sister couldn't make my wedding because she had given birth a few days prior. Absolutely overjoyed!

You do sound selfish! Your FSIL and FBIL are reeling with emotion right now and all you can think of is how will this affect 'your day'! Huh!??!?
Did you ever stop to think that she could possibly lose this baby like she lost the last one? How would you feel then?!

You need to realize that while this is the most important time in yours and your FH's life, it's not the most important time in everyone else's life! They need to do what's right for them, not you and your FH. Really. I'm surprised that you're even thinking like this.

Maybe once the news digests a little, you'll realize what a beautiful thing this is...for everyone!!

jennbaby Posted: Sep 09, 2002 08:38 PM

Re: Its venting time again

do me a favor and don't post with a nasty & rude way when I am feeling down also.
this was my post to vent not to be criticized by you!
i have a right to my feeling and a right to vent.
wow some people just know how to do nothing but make people feel worse.
thanks!

Kathi Posted: Sep 09, 2002 08:39 PM

Re: Its venting time again

OK.

I hope you feel better soon.

jennbaby Posted: Sep 09, 2002 08:40 PM

Re: Its venting time again

yea thanks i hope i do!

JudyBee Posted: Sep 09, 2002 08:44 PM

Re: Its venting time again

Jennbaby, take a deep breath. I do not think Kathi means any harm. I think she feels protective of your FSIL.

Miro127 Posted: Sep 09, 2002 08:50 PM

Re: Its venting time again

posting a thread like this is bound to get varied responses - it certainly is not a cut and dry issue, and i commend kathi for stating her opinion. by coming on this board and posting personal things you are opening yourself to hearing multiple perspectives - some that you agree with, some that you dont. i'm always one who wants to hear different perspectives on things ...

jennbaby Posted: Sep 09, 2002 08:50 PM

Re: Its venting time again

Thanks Judy, I know when I posted I'd seem like the bad guy. Just wanted to vent. Sometimes typing and your ladies responses make me always feel better about something that happened. I especially like this board because I am have no sisters and think of you ladies like the sisters I have never had.

jennbaby Posted: Sep 09, 2002 08:53 PM

Re: Its venting time again

i deleted my post. miro is right its cut & dry, but people like kathi just make it so you feel at your lowest.
i hope no one ever makes her fell the way she made me feel!

KimmieG Posted: Sep 09, 2002 08:56 PM

Re: Its venting time again

Hey Jenn!! I'm sorry you are feeling down :( I'm sorry for what you are going through. I'm not shocked at what you feel, I'm sure I would feel the same. I am sure that your FSIL and FBIL will keep in mind that this is you and their brothers big day, and do their best to make an effort, as well as I'm sure you will do the same for them and their baby :) It will all work out!

shamma Posted: Sep 09, 2002 09:33 PM

Re: Its venting time again

I saw your post earlier and I was waiting to get home to respond...Jen you should not take what Kathi says as if she was out to hurt your feelings. You have to remember as a bride your day is important to you and your FI. I know sometimes us as bride forget that not everyone sees our day as we do...yes they love us but they do have a right to their own lives. You cannot be mad at your SIL for getting pregnant. She could look at is as how dare Jen get married when she is pregnant...would that be fair of her, or to ask you to push your date back??? Your wedding is special and her pregnancy is special. Wish her well and maybe she can play another role in your wedding other than BM. It will all work out. Relax, relate release!!

All the best. You are too blessed to be stressed