Kind of long - MOM help needed

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Posted by AdriandSteve

Have them both walk down you down the aisle.

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Thanks, but she already told me she doesn't want to do that. It's like she's TRYING to be difficult. Like, I need to dream up something to do for her. I am so frustrated!!

Maybe before the BM gives the toast, you can personally take the mic and give your mother a verbal public thank you... it will give her a similar public recognition that your father gets for the dance...

I plan on doing that for my mom.

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Posted by CappyGirl

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Posted by AdriandSteve

Have them both walk down you down the aisle.

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Thanks, but she already told me she doesn't want to do that. It's like she's TRYING to be difficult. Like, I need to dream up something to do for her. I am so frustrated!!

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My mom wants to walk me down the aisle with my dad, however dad refuses (mind you they have been divorced for 6 years but act like babies)... got to find a way to break it to her

Some time after i dance with my Dad, i am going to dance with my mom. We have a song that is very special between us, so at some point we will dance. She has no idea though....lol
Tell ur mom to relax~ MOTB isnt that good enough? lol

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Posted by CappyGirl

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Posted by AdriandSteve

Have them both walk down you down the aisle.

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Thanks, but she already told me she doesn't want to do that. It's like she's TRYING to be difficult. Like, I need to dream up something to do for her. I am so frustrated!!

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woowww...are we sisters??? do we have the same mom??? because that sounds EXACTLY like my mom....shes always the one being 'left out' ....hmmmm nothing has really worked for me so far because there is always something with her buutttt have you asked you mom what she would like to do to make her stand out or feel special on your wedding day??? this might be better than you coming up with and suggesting ideas HTH

OMG! I totally understand how you are feeling. My mom is like that too and is a control freak, and since she is helping me out $$$$ I kind of have to go with the flow.

I've noticed that my mom lately has been making a bigger deal about her 'needs' and attention 'due' to her. I don't know what it is since this is my day.

I'm in the same boat as you and so far the only thing that has been working for me is asking her opinion on things and involving her more in the process...which is hard since she is so controlling. But that way she feels more apart of the wedding.

It seems to me that your mom wants recognition at the reception (getting a special dance or something). I think it is more like you said 'being mother of the bride makes her special and a guest of honor.'

It is hard to please everyone and you are doing to best you can. There comes a point where you have to draw the line. If you really feel like you need to honor her more maybe you could do something special at the rehearsal dinner.

Thanks ladies.

She just doesn't get it - being MOTB is a big deal and its her day just as much as it is mine, so EXCUSE ME if I didn't think she'd want to worry about reading in front of 100 people at church! The best part is that if I would have told her we wanted her to do something like that, she would think it was strange.

At our flower apts, which she has accompanied me, not FH, she can't get over that I won't be throwing the bo-k. She has a very definite idea of the way the wedding should be and she isn't very flexible. But I've included her in everything!! I don't know what to do. And I think that doing something like a photo montage or something just to honor her might be strange - I mean, she's not dead!! She's here! Maybe I can surprise her with a dance, but I'm going to have to hear it UNTIL then. OMG I can't.

i am having my mom and dad walk me down the aisle.

also, we are having a 'rose ceremony' during our ceremony where we take a minute to recognize our mothers and give them each a rose. they dont know we will be doing it so i think it will be a nice surprise for them

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Posted by CappyGirl

Thanks ladies.

She just doesn't get it - being MOTB is a big deal and its her day just as much as it is mine, so EXCUSE ME if I didn't think she'd want to worry about reading in front of 100 people at church! The best part is that if I would have told her we wanted her to do something like that, she would think it was strange.

At our flower apts, which she has accompanied me, not FH, she can't get over that I won't be throwing the bo-k. She has a very definite idea of the way the wedding should be and she isn't very flexible. But I've included her in everything!! I don't know what to do. And I think that doing something like a photo montage or something just to honor her might be strange - I mean, she's not dead!! She's here! Maybe I can surprise her with a dance, but I'm going to have to hear it UNTIL then. OMG I can't.

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OMG I think we have the same mother... i feel your pain!!!!

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Posted by KatieG2010

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Posted by CappyGirl

Thanks ladies.

She just doesn't get it - being MOTB is a big deal and its her day just as much as it is mine, so EXCUSE ME if I didn't think she'd want to worry about reading in front of 100 people at church! The best part is that if I would have told her we wanted her to do something like that, she would think it was strange.

At our flower apts, which she has accompanied me, not FH, she can't get over that I won't be throwing the bo-k. She has a very definite idea of the way the wedding should be and she isn't very flexible. But I've included her in everything!! I don't know what to do. And I think that doing something like a photo montage or something just to honor her might be strange - I mean, she's not dead!! She's here! Maybe I can surprise her with a dance, but I'm going to have to hear it UNTIL then. OMG I can't.

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OMG I think we have the same mother... i feel your pain!!!!

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I'm glad that I'm not the only one with this problem!!

I like the rose ceremony idea, but I can't help feeling like my mom wants to be recognized only. Like, it won't be special if we do it for FH's Mom too. I'm telling you - she's crazy.

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Posted by CappyGirl

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Posted by AdriandSteve

Have them both walk down you down the aisle.

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Thanks, but she already told me she doesn't want to do that. It's like she's TRYING to be difficult. Like, I need to dream up something to do for her. I am so frustrated!!

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This? Is my life. My mom REFUSES to walk me down the aisle... She's ultra-traditional, and she HATES the spotlight. My dad passed away 12 years ago, so my uncle will be walking me down. But the BIG reason she won't? 'The pictures will look funny.' I'm 5'3' my uncle is like, 5'8' and she's 5'11'. I tell her I don't care, but she doesn't want lopsided pictures!

However, I know she wants to be honored, so I've decided I am going to write something in the program honoring her... Private, but everyone will see it. :

I was once at a wedding where instead of the bo-k toss, the bride thanked her mother for everything and presented the bo-k to her.
It was really touching and a lovely moment.

Since you are not tossing, maybe something like that?

Our moms must know each other...

My mom is has been telling me that she is simply 'a checkbook' and nothing more. No body cares about MOTB. FOTB is a much better title (sorry mom that you do not have a pen is).
I am jewish and typically both mom and dad walk blushing bride down aisle, well she is 4'9 (very tiny and adorable) but she thinks that everyone will be staring that the ridiculous short lady and not the bride.

But now tomorrow she will do a complete 180 and be a different person entirely (aka happy MOTB). I swear she is crazy

Oh and the latest... is that since her and my father's anniversary is the day before my wedding she wants a 'surprise' toast and dance b/c they didn't have a 'real' wedding.

You're not alone....