I invited 240 people to my wedding and so far only 111 have said yes. People I thought would come said no, and people I didn't think would come said yes. I have 35 RSVP's left and my response date is Wednesday. I don't think I am going to meet my minimum of 175.
The thing that frustrates me is the weird reasons people cannot come. 'I can't get off work' (ok, it's a saturday night), 'I can't find a babysitter'. My one Aunt, who is also my godmother and an alcoholic isn't coming. She told my grandmother she didnt go to her own daughters wedding she isnt coming to mine. What a ******* whacko! Myself and my parents always bent over backwards and shifted our schedules to attend family parties and functions. I just had 2 cousins cancel b/c there 4 yr. old son is graduating pre-school that day @ 9 in the morning. I can understand that they can't make it to the church at 3, but I definetely think the reception at 7 shouldnt be a problem. FH's sergeant who he is really good friends with has known about our wedding since we got engaged 1 1/2 yrs. ago. He isn't coming b/c he is going on vacation. Couldnt you plan your ******* vacation the next weekend. Some people are just so rude!!!! It just amazes me out of 240 people, I may not even meet my minimum.
babybug631
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What a bunch of a$$holes. Unfortunately you learn who your true friends and family are. Those are some lame excuses. And I'm sure you will return the favor when they have something important happen in their lives. I guess you'll have a sweater to knit that day. And that's exactly what I would say too.
MsKitty1274
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I hear you!!! I know I have 2 1/2 weeks til my RSPV date comes, but we have invited 257 people, to date, we only have 61 which includes the bridal party, who ha;f haven't even sent there RSVPs. What the heck is wrong with people. I was telling FH I want to know who of the remaining are coming!!
JenTim
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Re: Kind of pissed....
I am worried that I may have too many people.......My hall holds 200 people comfortably and 230 squished. My lists is around 245 or so. We are getting married on Labor Day weekend. Should I be panicking like I am?
Brassgirl9
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That really is frustrating and I would totally be angry too. It's their loss if they don't go. Don't stress, keep planning, be excited and your day will still be wonderful no matter who is there. Just think twice before they ask you to attend any of their special days
ahall04
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Re: Kind of pissed....
What always amazes me is that people all of a sudden can't come... meanwhile they received a save the date card months ago!?!?! You would think if it were important to them they would take off work, find a babysitter, etc when they know of the date! I'm sure it will all work out for you, sorry you have to stress about it!
lacey&mark
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this is a time when you find out who really cares! i have 2 brothers that arent coming, and they sent their reply cards without explanations...so i know it hurts when poeple act like they dont care. just know that you will be surrounded by people who love you on your special day and its not about how many people you have its about who really cares. i hope you meet your minimum! ~Lacey
FallBride05
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Re: Kind of pissed....
We had the same thing. We invited 498 people, was certain we would have no trouble meeting our 300 person gaurantee. Our final headcount 5 days before the wedding was 279. Our hall was nice enough to drop our gaurantee to 280 so we only had to pay for one extra plate.
People we were so sure were coming didn't come and some of them also had the dumbest reasons. And those that couldn't find a babysitter...... HELLO... everyone knew the date for 9 months. I think that's pleanty enough time to find a babysitter!
Gin-Char 104
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ok after reading this i am a little nervous! AHAHAHAH i feel your frustration!
MattandTricia07
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That stinks!!!
That is seriously one of my major concerns, especially since I'm getting married during the holiday season.
CLMon7906
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hopefully the 35 left all say yes!!! big meanies. i agree with whoever said to say you're knitting a sweater next time you're invited somewhere!
bride2b24
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wow.......(sorry for the caps but......) A PRESCHOOL GRADUATION????????THATS FRIGGIN INSANE......honestly if i were you i wouldnt even say anything to these ppl just bc if they dont want to be there....then who needa them? its your wedding and these excuses are terrible....im sorry you must be feeling crappy.....dont worry youll make your minimum
jellybean1420
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In some ways I really feel insulted. I guess its just a huge let down when you expect someone to be there and they are not.
sarahthegreat
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i wouldn't stress it. people make plans and people also make lame azz excuses when they are too embarrassed to admit the real reasons.
ChrissynRicky
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Posted by jellybean1420
In some ways I really feel insulted. I guess its just a huge let down when you expect someone to be there and they are not.
What I've learned, and that many brides here will tell you, is that you can't take things like this personally (well, the majority of it b/c your aunt's excuse is just absurd.)
There are many reasons that people cannot attend a wedding and 99% of them have nothing to do with you.
- Vacation Plans - Other Events they've already promised to be there for - Monetary Problems
Keep your chin up as much as you can, and don't go into this with any grudges b/c people can't attend.
You can always invite some last minute guests. We did, and no one was insulted, and they all said 'yes' and were honored.
Otherwise, if you can't meet your minimum then, talk to your hall and work something out so that you're not completely breaking the bank.
Good Luck.
glinda_goodwitch
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I feel your pain! My wedding is the Saturday before Father's day, and a few of my mother's relatives can't come due to Father's day plans. Okay, they would only be driving 3.5 hours to the wedding and could be back by noon on Sunday if they really wanted to. My close cousin reponded No, with no reason at all, and I came to her wedding a year and a half ago. I also drive 8 hours to be there. That one kills me. I am so mad at my 'family' right now. I use quotes because they really haven't been acting like family lately. We will make our minimum, but only because it is 100 people. Otherwise we would be in the same boat.
DandS
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Re: Kind of pissed....
Some people are very rude! I am sorry!!! I can not speak from experience with our wedding because I have not sent out invitations yet, but I remember from my brothers wedding the horrible excuses that people came up with. No babysitter, vacations planned (our aunt said that who knew about the wedding a year and a half in advance), can't get a flight in (you mean to tell me EVERY airline was booked for that day, and if so then fly in the day before), etc. It is so rude. It is amazing how people you really expected to come say no. Everyone always tells me that you really learn a lot about people from your wedding.
Sunrise813
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Re: Kind of pissed....
Aww sweetie I am so sorry, I know EXACTLY how you feel. We are in the same boat as you. We invited 250 and we are only going to have 185 so we will not meet our minimum of 200.
And you are right it really hurts when people you always just assumed would be at your wedding and they say no, and then their reasons are so flipped. Its weird cause while you are dating there are friends who are like “ we can’t wait tillyou guys get married, we wouldn’t miss it” and then they just write no on the response card and you are left thinking WHY??
I was the maid of Honor at my aunts wedding, she is like a best friend & a second mom all wrapped up in one, and of course she is also one of my bridesmaids, well I was really hurt to hear that her husband will not be attending the church, I mean I was the maid of honor at HIS wedding and he doesn’t want to be there when I walk down the ilse!! She said that since it’s a Friday he did not want to take off from work, umm he he is a Partner in the company so taking off would not be an issue, he is one of the bosses.
Anyway don’t let it get you down, what you can do if you don’t meet your minimum is get the hall to throw in some extras.
suzybilly819
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That stinks!
I just sent my invites out but I have already gotten a few verbal Nos from people claiming that they can't get a babysitter, etc
The people that truly care about you will be there and that is all that matters. Try talking to your about lowering the min or do you have a b-list??
leese
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I have gone through this as well and it is disappointing. But I promise you, you will be ovecome by the people who do make your wedding and their love and support. And in the future, you will think twice about bending over backwards for those that don't return the favor.
