Like I need this know

camarogirl42482 Posted: Mar 14, 2007 11:09 AM

Like I need this know

Should I be upset or should I just let it go?

well when i was in high school, i was friends with this girl named sarah. (at that point in time she was Jimmy(my fh now) girlfriendof 4 years) thats how i met him. We were pretty good friends then. But she cheated on Jimmy and I kinda lost touch with both of them. more so her than Jimmy. Me and Jimmy still went to ged classes together and hung out. Well we ended up dating and He still talks to her quite often. I dont mind that. Well once we got engaged we were trying to figure out who we wanted to be bridemaids and grromsmen. Well Debbie (fh mom) made the suggestion of sarah being a bridesmaid. Jimmy was like yeah lets see. SO I was like ok. I can handle that also. Well today Jimmy( fh) tells me that sarah will need a place to stay during the wedding and offered for her to stay at our house. I am not ok with that. I dont need the added stress of her there and plus there history really makes me uncomfotable with her sleeping in the same house. Am I just being completely crazy about this or do you think it should be ok for me to say NO. thanks girls love ya

vmystique33 Posted: Mar 14, 2007 11:22 AM

Re: Like I need this know

I wouldnt want her staying with me either thats way too uncomfortable and awkward for me . If you dont want her staying w/you sit down w/ fh and explain to him that its too uncomfortable and that it will be a very stressful week for you and that her staying there is only going to stress you out more

gaccrrm Posted: Mar 14, 2007 11:23 AM

Re: Like I need this know

I would definitely be uncomfortable with that. You are a pretty strong woman to even have her in you BP.

Jennifer907 Posted: Mar 14, 2007 11:23 AM

Re: Like I need this know

I was in a similar situation when I was friends with FHs ex (we're not friends anymore). I NEVER would have been comfortable with her as one of my BMs, but she did sleep at our house, but only with her boyfriend at that time, who was also FHs friend. I wouldn't allow it if it were just her. So no, I don't think you're crazy.

acsm Posted: Mar 14, 2007 11:30 AM

Re: Like I need this know

Posted by Soon2BMrsMunzGunz

I would definitely be uncomfortable with that. You are a pretty strong woman to even have her in you BP.

agreed... i would feel uncomfortable having her in the house... your place cant really be the absolute last place she can stay at??

jboota22 Posted: Mar 14, 2007 11:34 AM

Re: Like I need this know

I would not like that either. It's your wedding and you shouldn't have to be worrying about anything like that. You should not make it an issue that it's HER staying over....you don't want to start any trust issue thing...just say you don't really want ANYONE staying there....it's hectic enough and you want to have your space. ??

kitty1224 Posted: Mar 14, 2007 11:37 AM

Re: Like I need this know

no way, you are not being crazy, there is no need for her to stay in your house.

lizzynyu Posted: Mar 14, 2007 11:37 AM

Re: Like I need this know

Wow...you are a much better woman than I am. I don't know that I'd even have her in my bridal party. But, since you are, I definitely don't think you are wrong for not wanting her to stay at your house. I'm sure you trust your FH 150% but still, I would feel uncomfortable for that to.

MrsQ-in2007 Posted: Mar 14, 2007 11:39 AM

Re: Like I need this know

I think you were nice enough to allow her to be a BM. I personally would not allow her to stay in my house, and if you feel the same way, you should let your FH know and he *should* understand.

PeterNina Mom Posted: Mar 14, 2007 11:40 AM

Re: Like I need this know

You are pretty strong to have her in the BP and I definitely would NOT WANT HER STAYING IN MY HOME WITH MY FUTURE HUSBAND THERE TOO. Try to find her someplace else to stay.

FullersBride Posted: Mar 14, 2007 11:42 AM

Re: Like I need this know

Yeah.....I would totally be uncomfortable. You have every right to feel that way too. Be honest with your FH and tell him how you feel!

jessruth9 Posted: Mar 14, 2007 11:45 AM

Re: Like I need this know

I completely agree - don't make it about her. It's your wedding and you have enough stress without houseguests. Give her the same info you give all your other OOT's and let her stay in a hotel.

neener1211 Posted: Mar 14, 2007 11:49 AM

Re: Like I need this know

Posted by lizzynyu

Wow...you are a much better woman than I am. I don't know that I'd even have her in my bridal party. But, since you are, I definitely don't think you are wrong for not wanting her to stay at your house. I'm sure you trust your FH 150% but still, I would feel uncomfortable for that to.

I couldn't have said this better myself.

butapecan3 Posted: Mar 14, 2007 12:01 PM

Re: Like I need this know

I wouldn't let her be in BP or stay in my house!

camarogirl42482 Posted: Mar 14, 2007 12:08 PM

Re: Like I need this know

Well I called him and told him that. I dont think it would be a good idea that she stay there before the wedding because I am already going to be stressed, and it would just add more stress with having to make sure she has a bed and to cook more food to feed her. Well he got pissed and said that I dont trust him and thats not even the case. Its just i dont want to be uncomfortable or more stressed. So i tried explaining it to him again and he hung up on me. So i treied to call him back and as soon as he heard my voice he hung up again. grrrr. I really dont need this.

Marchbride07 Posted: Mar 14, 2007 12:17 PM

Re: Like I need this know

Girl you are not crazy! I would DEFINITELY not let her stay in my house. no way jose, never never never! Or I would and I wouldn't sleep at all...

I know some people say if you trust your FH blah blah blah but if god forbid she tried anything, even if FH turns it down, it is still definitely unwanted stress!

Just my humble opinon

LICARRIE Posted: Mar 14, 2007 12:20 PM

Re: Like I need this know

I don't think you are crazy. I would not be able to deal with her in my house it would get to me.

billandme Posted: Mar 14, 2007 12:46 PM

Re: Like I need this know

I don't think you're crazy at all. BUT, your FH is being VERY RUDE about this. He should be taking your feelings into consideration. If you tell him that you are not comfortable then he should understand and tell his ex that. For him to hang the phone up on you because you expressed how you felt about the situation is NOT COOL......

Here are some hugs

camarogirl42482 Posted: Mar 14, 2007 01:13 PM

Re: Like I need this know

Thanks girls. Love ya

neener1211 Posted: Mar 14, 2007 01:14 PM

Re: Like I need this know

Posted by camarogirl42482

Well I called him and told him that. I dont think it would be a good idea that she stay there before the wedding because I am already going to be stressed, and it would just add more stress with having to make sure she has a bed and to cook more food to feed her. Well he got pissed and said that I dont trust him and thats not even the case. Its just i dont want to be uncomfortable or more stressed. So i tried explaining it to him again and he hung up on me. So i treied to call him back and as soon as he heard my voice he hung up again. grrrr. I really dont need this.

now I DEFINITELY wouldn't let her stay....just because he brought the 'trust' issue up...JMO