Long Vent about future SIL

Kim27 Posted: May 17, 2011 04:16 PM

Long Vent about future SIL

My Future Sister in law is making me feel like I am asking to much. Every time we talk about her daughter who is the flower girl she always as a face on. I picked the flower girl dress a very simple classic white dress with a sash to match the girls dresses. When she saw it the other day she was like 'oh this is so simply' whey didn't you have any stones or lace on it. Then I asked her if she had a slip to wear she said no and that was it so I asked her if she wanted me to buy one for her and she was like oh that would be great. Fine not a big deal but you think that she would say oh ill pick it up. I don't have children I don't know where to buy a slip or what size to get!! Next was the shoes I emailed her a few pictures of shoes that i would like her to wear and she said her daughter who will be 9 can only wear flats and they are to much money. So i said that i would again pay for them since they are what i like and she said no ill just buy a pair at target or payless. She makes me feel like i am being a bridezilla The best part is she told me her daughter will not be getting her hair done and either is she for the wedding because it is a waste and she can do it herself. Her daughter always look a mess OH yeah and she told me how her daughter has to walk alone at the church because she read online that is how it is done traditionally. I wanted the flower girl and the ring bearers to walk all together Am i reading into all of this because i am stressed that we have 3months to go?? Am i being a bridezilla???

HSsweethearts Posted: May 17, 2011 04:19 PM

Re: Long Vent about future SIL

NOOOOO

I think SHE is being a momzilla

Kelli218 Posted: May 17, 2011 04:24 PM

Re: Long Vent about future SIL

Some people are seriously crazy!!!

rosatemp Posted: May 17, 2011 04:24 PM

Re: Long Vent about future SIL

Posted by HSsweethearts

NOOOOO

I think SHE is being a momzilla

omg ITA!!!!!!!

MrsTarricone2B Posted: May 17, 2011 04:24 PM

Re: Long Vent about future SIL

Posted by HSsweethearts

NOOOOO

I think SHE is being a momzilla

I agree!!! My FG and RB are walking down together and if that's what you want then that's the way it should be.

Kim27 Posted: May 17, 2011 04:24 PM

Re: Long Vent about future SIL

That she is! I wish i didnt have either of them in my wedding party! I didn't want to be like that but she is driving me crazy!

rosatemp Posted: May 17, 2011 04:32 PM

Re: Long Vent about future SIL

you need to tell her that the last time you checked it was your wedding not hers and this is what you want!!

christine12 Posted: May 17, 2011 04:35 PM

Re: Long Vent about future SIL

I don't think you are being unreasonable. You offered to pay for the slip & shoes.
I am paying for my flower girls' dresses, shoes etc. because I know my brother can't afford it and it wouldn't be right to pay for one and not the other. I also didn't really give them a choice about hair. I just told them that my hairdresser was doing the girls' hair (I am paying for it.)

Kim27 Posted: May 17, 2011 04:42 PM

Re: Long Vent about future SIL

I would love to say that I could pay for everything but since my FH company that he was working for just closed we really don't have the extra money right now and her and her husband make A Lot. The flower dress that I picked was $40 because I didn't want her to have to spend a lot on the dress. I could have picked the dress that I was in love with but it was $180. I wish I wasn't the type of person that was always thinking about everyone else feeling and trying to be the nice girl because look where it has gotten me. I feel bad telling her that she has to go and have her hair done. I didn't want to get ready with my whole wedding party the mornign of my wedding, so I left it up to them to make an appointment and that is when she told me she was going to do it.

Moonmist09 Posted: May 17, 2011 04:43 PM

Re: Long Vent about future SIL

i think this lady is CRAZY!!!!!!!!
i have to say, why not have her buy the slip and pay her back for it. and the shoes - no one will really see, so who cares what they look like, you know?
you can only hope and pray that her hair looks nice and neart for the big day

IrishAli Posted: May 17, 2011 04:53 PM

Re: Long Vent about future SIL

I would offer to pay for the hair since she is a mess, and that's it

Its your wedding, do what you want

meghan13 Posted: May 17, 2011 04:56 PM

Re: Long Vent about future SIL

I think there comes a point where maybe you should stand up a little for yourself! She is walking all over you.

People are NOT obligated to be in the weddng - if she doesn't like your decisions about your wedding she can take her daughter out.

Of course - alot easier said then done.

Angel120905 Posted: May 17, 2011 05:02 PM

Re: Long Vent about future SIL

Posted by HSsweethearts

NOOOOO

I think SHE is being a momzilla

Ita

Soon2bMrsB91511 Posted: May 17, 2011 07:27 PM

Re: Long Vent about future SIL

I don't think you're being too unreasonable. I too have a FSIL that I'm not super close with, so I understand your frustration. Your FSIL is being difficult, no doubt about it.

This being said, I do feel like if there's anything you want for your wedding, you need to pay for it yourself. In this case, if you want her to wear a certain pair of shoes, or have her hair done, it's up to you to pay for it.

I wanted to make sure my bm's look beautiful, so were paying for their hair and make up As part of their gift.

This, IMO, is just how it is. You want it, be prepared to pay for it...you can't expect your fSIL to foot the bill, especially since it sounds like she could care less what she or her daughter look like for your wedding.

TheEyesOfMarch Posted: May 17, 2011 07:39 PM

Re: Long Vent about future SIL

Posted by HSsweethearts

NOOOOO

I think SHE is being a momzilla

this, espically since you offered to pay... i can see if it was expensive and she was paying for everything but cmon... your not asking much at all.

TheEyesOfMarch Posted: May 17, 2011 07:40 PM

Re: Long Vent about future SIL

and who cares whether its tradion for the flower girl to walk by herself.. its YOUR wedding

ImgonnabeMrsC Posted: May 17, 2011 08:29 PM

Re: Long Vent about future SIL

Momzilla, agreed! I'm having three nieces n a nephew in my wedding and I'm having them walk in twos. I don't think it really matters, it's your day!

nikki41579 Posted: May 17, 2011 09:45 PM

Re: Long Vent about future SIL

You are not being a bridezilla at all. What is wrong with people???? It is your day and if you want the flower girl to walk with the ring bearer then that is your decision and no one should question it. You cannot please everyone. If you want to pay foe her slip, shoes and hair so be it.

3 more months, I'm there with you! The stress will be over soon.

LoveyDovey Posted: May 17, 2011 11:13 PM

Re: Long Vent about future SIL

people need to learn to smile and nod

and just say yes to what the bride wants (within reason)

and I think your requests are def reasonable

people loooove to complain and looove to have opinions when they are not needed!

Kim27 Posted: May 18, 2011 07:10 AM

Re: Long Vent about future SIL

Thank You so much girls you have made me feel so much better!!!

I don't mind buying her shoes and her slip and I did offer that option to her already. I would just think if you said yes to being in the wedding party that you would know you would have to pay for and how to act. It just is crazy to me that she is OK with her daughter not having a slip, it is a white dress with a small lining in it. If it was my daughter I wouldn't want to take the chance of people being able to see through it. I would also want my daughter to look cute and not just thrown together. I guess she really doenst care.

My FH is also annoyed with her about how she is acting as well. I think my FMIL is going to take her granddaughter with her when she gets her hair done that day and pay for it