Ok, so I have one month and one day....my maid of honor is totally MIA. Booked a place to have my shower, but never sent invites. Was supposed to be this coming Saturday. Questioned her about it, and she told me I was crazy. I checked with family and non-family, NO one has gotten one. I email her and ask for a simple explanation....she never replies. I don't get it.
Will not return any communication with me...so I say if you don't contact me I am guessing you don't want to be in the wedding. No reply...
What am I to do, I mean I am going to move someone up, but at this point I have invested a lot in to having four people, not 3. None of my close friends are able to make it to LI, because either that have family things to do for the 4th or have to work.
I guess at this point I am shocked!!!
Any advice? As I do hope no one else has had to deal with this!!
Thanks- Nancy
angie3
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Re: Is it possible...
Just a thought but is it possible that everyone is playing dumb with you because they want your shower to be a surprise and are trying to fool you?
jennbaby
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Re: Is it possible...
thats has to be it, they are trying to fool you. does she call you???
Marnles
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Re: Is it possible...
Angie - good point. I have to admit that I am TERRIBLE with surprises! I don't call anyone when it's close to a shower or surprise party, because I'm so afraid I'm going to slip. People have actually gotten upset with me over it, but when I offer my explanation, they understand. Hopefully that's what it is, and you'll have a wonderful day...
Nancy
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Re: Is it possible...
Guys, seriously I wish. I often pinch myself to make sure I am not dreaming...
We called (I did)the place here, and they said she need to pick the menu and if I would do it. They said that she hasn't returned their calls or even a letter they sent. Honestly, she hasn't called, hasn't written or even known of my exsistance. Sounds terrible...but every day I feel more and more hurt. I still have her dress and shoes waiting to say she has an appointment to get it altered, but with one month left...I doubt it.
Luckily my sisters came through and put together a housewarming party for us...but still.
Any suggestions if I should find someone to fill the spot, or should I just take the 'loss?'
Thanks- Nancy
jennbaby
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Re: Is it possible...
Nancy, If I dont hear from her, I'd try my absolute best to contact her, then replace her, you cant be without a MOH!
aug9bride
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Re: Is it possible...
Nancy, Does she live near you? Maybe you can stop by her house to talk to her. IF you are there , she can't avoid you.
JennK
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Re: Maid of Honor woes (vent)
Wow...I just wrote a long story, I am having MOH issues too. I think you should call her and ask her straight out. You dont need this stress right now. I really hope everybody else is right and they are trying to fool you with the shower. Good luck, I hope everything works out ok.
taraalissa
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Re: Maid of Honor woes (vent)
I also think you should go to her house and confront her. Once you are face to face, she will have to deal with you and tell you what her problem is. As for how fate will treat her, she is doing a terrible, awful thing to you, and it will come back to her in the long-run. Enjoy your shower, the rest of your engagment and your wedding. Don't let negativity ruin this wonderful time.
Karen62794
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Re: Maid of Honor woes (vent)
You need to confront her immediately. I don't understand why someone would do such a thing, but I would without a doubt go and confront her and find out what is going on.
You don't need this, especially now. I'm sorry that you're hurting and I hope your other maids will be able to lend their support.
Karen
Cindy
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Re: Maid of Honor woes (vent)
I have learned through my planning that there are going to be dissapointments with the bridal party. For example, this weekend was my shower and my one bridesmaid showed up 40 minutes later than guests were supposed to be there and I saw her in the parking lot when we pulled in. She was having boyfriend trouble she said. My mom paid for my shower and planned it all and all she had to do was be there on time. My FH's sister seemed like it was such a hassle to participate at the shower. I have had other little problems with others too and you think you are the only one and then you hear other stories. I hope it works out for you. Hang in there!!
michele31
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Re: Maid of Honor woes (vent)
They could be playing totally dumb to shock and surprise you. But at least point it isn't funny if they are. Speak to your Mom. Tell her that if this is what they are doing you need it to stop before you say something to your MOH and tell her she is out of the wedding. Did you have a fight or something and perhaps she is holding onto it? This is very odd behavior. I think you need to speak to her in person, not thru e-mail.
shamma
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Re: Maid of Honor woes (vent)
Nancy, does your MOH live in LI with you?? you need to go to her house and get this straightened out. You do not need this kind of stress so close to your big day. I think this is so irresponsible of her to act this way. A MOH is supposed to alleviate stress, she is causing you stress. Did you 2 have any kind of disagreement recently, for her to behave in this manner?? I pray this is a just a surprise that everyone is in on. WHat is going on with the rest of your BP?? has anyone of them been in contact with her?? was she planning your shower by herself??? Please get to the botton of this, I can imagine how hurt you are.
Hope everything works out.
dcbride
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Re: Maid of Honor woes (vent)
Nancy what happened? Is everythign better now?
Kel
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Re: Maid of Honor woes (vent)
Nancy,
I haven't been around much, and just now noticed your post. What a horrible thing to be going through so close to your wedding. Hopefully by now, this has been resolved.
Had anyone heard from your MOH to know that she was okay despite her being MIA and not responding to anyone. Could it be she had some personal or family emergencies that had taken her away from normal life?
Horrible things happen. I know it's a lousy way to think, but it makes you wonder when someone just completely drops out of communication at such an important and critical time.
As for the ideas that everyone might be in on hiding the surprise .. in my opinion, I'd rather the person just simply found out about the surprise rather than put them through all the stress of wondering what's going on.
