I come from a super close knit family - and we have had something of a run of bad luck recently.
My father died in 2000. It was horrible - and honestly - if I had not gotten pregnant with my son right afterward... I was on a big type self destructive path.
My sister died from breast cancer in 2001. Nobody saw that coming. It hurt so much. We buried her on Christmas Eve.
I grew even closer to my mother after these losses - she watched my kids and spent so much time with us. She LOVED my FH like her own. When she got sick in September of last year I couldn't believe it. She died in October and I was just beyond devastated that she did not live to see me get married or own a home.
So now I am getting married. And I want to find a way to include the people that I wish could be there. Can you guys give me some inspiration...?
AMGBride2008
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Re: Memorial...
First off... I'm so sorry to hear about all of your hardship within the past few years
My suggestion to you... perhaps on you dais you have a picture of each family member with a candle next to each pictures sort of as a small memorial. And it's right there with you all the time. Another idea, and this can be just for you... take a small picture of each fam. member and put it in a tiny frame and attach it to you bo-k. Another LIW bride did that... I'll try and find her so you can see the pic. HTH.
eta: the LIW bride is Goldi1021... here's a pic of her bo-k...
betani
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Re: Memorial...
you could do something in their honor - ie donate to a charity for breat cancer in honor of your sister and give cards out explaining why as favors, have the date on a special day (ie, your father's birthday), or wear something meaningful (your mother's wedding dress or a piece of jewelry).
maybe you could have little booklets with a page each about them in it and hand that out to the guests/have them out to read.
or have songs dedicated to them played during the reception.
my mother's father (my grandpa) died just a little bit before her wedding and she had her photo taken holding a drawing of him her uncle had done. it's really sweet, but sad. her brother walked her down the isle.
i'm sorry for your losses.
loveisinbloom
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Re: Memorial...
I just want to say I really am sorry for your loss family means everything to me as well. It sounds like you all loved and cherished each other while they were alive which to me is the most important thing I love the fact that you want to include them that is very touching I liked the idea about the booklet and the pic on the flowers very special ideas also make a dedication with a song if you like put their pictures up with candles like someone else said beautiful ideas. they will be with you on your day they will be in your heart always ......
M&LSept1606
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Re: Memorial...
I'm so sorry to hear about everything that has happened to you. That's just devastating. I can relate a bit, my mom passed away 5 years ago of Breast Cancer and I miss her every day more and more.
I'm doing a candle for her, and framing some pics of me and her. I also did a breast cancer awareness basket for my guests to take car magnets, bracelets and breast cancer awareness pins. I posted pics of the basket last night. I'm placing the basket, her candle, and pictures on the piano at the entrance of the vineyards. (that's what I'm hoping to do)
I can bump it for you. Let me know if you need me to.
shelby34
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Re: Memorial...
I am so so sorry to hear of your losses I am doing a table with memorial candles and a poem for my grandparents. However, with all of your losses you should do something more. Maybe a prayer, something in the program, a song dedicated to them where no one else dances. I don't know, but I hope you find something very special to you and your family.
soontobmrsn
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Re: Memorial...
First, I am so very sorry..FH and I are in a similar situation after losing my cousin (who was like my third brother) on 9/11 it was sort of downhill from there we lost soooo many family members..............that being said on the recommendation of our DOC ...we are doing little things to remember and honor our loved ones who arent with us, but not making our wedding day too sad (i know our moms wouldnt want that) soo we will have two tables one to the left and one to the right of the aisle and when FH enters with his best men, his brothers they will light a candle on a table with pictures of all those in his family that have passed away and then i will do the same with my dad on the left hand side right before we walk down the aisle..............we are also doing a donation for our moms..............HTH :)
Amaker
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Re: Memorial...
I am so sorry to hear about your losses but there is a way to include them. My FH's father passed away and we purchased a personalized candle to put at the reception. We bought it at exclusivelyweddings.com Also for a friend of ours that passed away 4th of July weekend in a boating accident. During the cocktail hour, my FH's mother, myself, our friend that passed aways wife are going to light them. If you want a pic I can FM it to you.
cjb88
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Re: Memorial...
i did memory candles... there are some picts in my review... and a donation favor in memory of my dad... i know he was there in spirit at my wedding...
snydl40
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Re: Memorial...
I am so sorry for all of your losses. We are in a similar situation with Fh's family. We will be lighting candles, and have pictures all around our hall of our family and friends.
daniebc16
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Re: Memorial...
I love all the suggestions above. In addition you can devote a page to the love ones you lost in your program if you are getting married in a church.
anglbyme
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Re: Memorial...
I am going to leave the 1st chair on my side as well as FH side empty with a single rose and pic of my mom and his cousin in memory of them. Sorry to hear of all your loss in such a short period of time.
cherryj24
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Re: Memorial...
Posted by soontobmrsn
First, I am so very sorry..FH and I are in a similar situation after losing my cousin (who was like my third brother) on 9/11 it was sort of downhill from there we lost soooo many family members..............that being said on the recommendation of our DOC ...we are doing little things to remember and honor our loved ones who arent with us, but not making our wedding day too sad (i know our moms wouldnt want that) soo we will have two tables one to the left and one to the right of the aisle and when FH enters with his best men, his brothers they will light a candle on a table with pictures of all those in his family that have passed away and then i will do the same with my dad on the left hand side right before we walk down the aisle..............we are also doing a donation for our moms..............HTH :)
I really like that idea, it's so sweet. I am so sorry for all of these unfortunate and tragic losses. Remember they are with you always, whatever you do, they will appreciate it and be there!
Jackie&Justin
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Re: Memorial...
I am also walking down the aisle with a locket with a pic of my brother who passed away, also I have a memorial candle with a beautiful poem on it that we will light....so sorry about your losses, fm me if you want to talk.
Meaghan729
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Re: Memorial...
great ideas ladies - i love the locket in the bouquet!!
Nikki24591
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Re: Memorial...
I'm sorry for your loses. My brother was killed by a drunk driver in 2002. What we are doing to remember him is in my program. We have a poem and at the end we put an Angel pin and asked people to wear them in memory of him.
'Someone Is Missing' Let this Angel be a loving reminder that someone is missing today, Someone our hearts still hold on to, As we travel along life's way. Someone who made life so special, for all those who gather here, Someone who won't be forgotten, But cherished from year to year. And now as we pause to remember, Let us all fondly recall, how dearly each of us loved him, and oh... how he loved us all!
Please wear this angel pin in memory of Nicole's brother Kenny.
You could change the words to fit the people you have lost. I didn't want to do anything that would be a constant visual reminder that he wasn't here with us.
CaseyVM214
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Re: Memorial...
OMG I am so sorry for your loss. Unfortunately I do not have any better suggestions that have already been listed....They will all be there that day with you no matter what...
Marly
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Re: Memorial...
I FM you.
sarahradio5
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Re: Memorial...
OMG.... I am so sorry to hear about all you have been through. You are such a strong person for getting through all that - and all your loved ones ARE going to be with you on your beautiful wedding day!
A lot of the girls already have beautiful ways of memorializing your loved ones. Some are more obvious parts of the ceremony than others, so it's up to you how much you want to do. My FH's dad died about 10 years ago from lung cancer, which was a real blow to his family and my grandmother died 9 years ago (at 96 years old) but the pain is still SO great for my family - especially mom that she doesn't want anyhing extravagant done that would damper the day. I was going to have an empty chair with a white rose representing each loved one we were remembering, but my mom said that would be too much to take.
Instead, we are just having one memorial candle and having someone read that that candle represents my grandmother, my Aunt Kay and my FH's father, who aren't there with us, but who are forever in our hearts and our minds, and my FH and I will light the candle after the unity candle. We'll also bring that to the reception and put that on the fireplace, lit, at our reception site, with pictures of our loved ones who we lost, so they are 'there'.
God bless you - and know that you just have that many more angels watching you and your family now.
