Mommy vent....

need to vent a little...thanks girls!!!

so i really want to get ready at a hotel and what not...my mom the first time i told her...screamed and yelled at me and i was in such shock i just dropped it.....

so im looking into different hotels and i really want to do this...(it is my day and i am paying---such a bridezilla statement i know lol) and so i asked her todsay to come with me (bec i think when she sees it she will love it!) and instead of flipping she said...i thought we already discussed this? diiscussed what? you yelled and screamed and i just stoipped talking...

so she mopes around the house all solemn and with the guilt trip...and all the guilt really ...i cant even....so i just said ...why cant you just be open to just look??? so she gave me her talk and went on her way....

then...

she calls me giving me more of her deal and shes like you watch too mnay platnium weddings and this is why you want to do this!!! ummmm...no i just love the way getting ready pics at the hotel looks and i really just want to not worry about eveeyone coming to our house and whatever... and so i just gave up bec she wouldnt stop...

so then the whole photg thing comes up...we have two guys the whole day...i want one with me while im getting ready and one with fh while he is getting ready....so she says to me why would you do that? do they even do that? I said because i want pics of my fh getting ready and opening my gift to him and i have two so i want to utlize them..and yes they do it i already asked!

so shes like your supposed to exchange gifts at the RD...i said says who? i want to do it the morning of?

what difference does it make to you if there is a photo with fh and we open up OUR gifts to each toher the morning of???? how does that affect you??

so she says...its not how we do it? u mmm we who? we got married 20-somehting years ago..well your uncle...my uncle got married almost 10 years ago...

i know this seems smalll but i wanted to get married on a beach in mexcio and she went on and on about that...then i looked into disney...she shot that down too..thwn i wanted a smalll 75person wedding and that isnt happening...and then i wanted to get married at the RH and abs not it has to be in the church...

who is getting married here?!?!?!!?!?

uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

and the guilt she gives me is just unreal....


ok thanks for letting me vent girls!!

mom and i had had many discussions of 'traditions' followed in my country but i really don't want to i had made it clear for her! I can understand what you are going in thru but if you keep making your point out there! she will understand in the end! i have to get married in the church too and my dress has to be white! but i told her that those are the ONLY things I will do because i feel that's enough I too wanted a destination wedding in p.r but no my mom was against that!! good luck Christina

You sound like a sweetheart and VERY patient and accomodating. Hang in there and try your best to stand up for keeping the day about you and FH and what you two want

aaah.. gotta love the mothers and their guilt trips.

Just stand your ground, try to be overly nice about the reasons ur doing what ur doing (honey attracts more then vinegar) and do what u want lol.

sorry you have to deal with this. yes it is YOUR wedding. i feel like parents should read a book about how involved or not involved to get sometimes.

my mom is pretty clueless (first one getting married) ...and the only thing she knows is her very simple wedding back in the 70s....

i gave her one of the books from THE KNOT that i got as an e-gift and told her to read it.

i think she read 2 pages. lol




but dont worry. you know how parents can be...they complain complain...and then AFTER its executed and they start hearing compliments from OTHER ppl, they think its a great idea. like, umm yeah.......

do you have a Jewish Mother like me?
My Mom is not agreeing on anything I am doing.
My saying is:

NO pay, no say....

I've had so many conversations with my mom about these types of things. She got married 25 years ago.

Some of her feelings about our wedding:

-She doesn't undersstand why I need my makeup done- cant I do it myself?
-She doesnt understand that I need a makeup trial
-She suggested we dont have CPs to save money

thanks so much girls!!!

i felt like i was going crazy before!!!

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Posted by dfw343

do you have a Jewish Mother like me?
My Mom is not agreeing on anything I am doing.
My saying is:

NO pay, no say....

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haha...mine is an italian mother....oh the guilt lol....
and we are paying for everything so...perhaps i should try this line more often lol

Yes, if you are paying for things they should be your way. In fact, they should be they way you and FH decide regardless of who is paying, but chances are when mom pays you have to give her a little leeway.

I think you should make her understand you have already made alot of compromises about this wedding and there are some things you are insistant on. Tell her the last thing you want her to worry about on the day of your wedding is getting a house clean and having to entertain the bridal party. Tell her you want her to have nothing on her mind but being the mother of the bride and being treated accordingly.

My mom also got upset when I told her I wasn't going to get ready at the house. I just told her that a hotel would have more room and no one would have to worry about cleaning up.

Ugh! I am so sorry that this is happening.
People are ridiculous. This is YOUR day AND you're paying! This day should be whatever you & FH want it to be, and that is that. It needs to be understood whose wedding this is.

When you're feeling down, just remember the almighty power of the dollar.

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Posted by SummerBride10

I've had so many conversations with my mom about these types of things. She got married 25 years ago.

Some of her feelings about our wedding:

-She doesn't undersstand why I need my makeup done- cant I do it myself?
-She doesnt understand that I need a makeup trial
-She suggested we dont have CPs to save money

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No CPS?????

My dad said we should buy a 500 dollar camera and have someone take pics instead of hiring a photog