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Money question

Original post by wo0shply

Hi ladies,

I know most of you are paying for your wedding on your own. FH and I got some really bad news on Friday. My mother had left me some money before she passed away and I was planning to use it for our wedding but we found out that we could not get an advance on the money.

So there is a possibility that we might need to postpone the wedding. I have to quit my job due to school and take on a part-time paid internship and FH still has his job but all of our savings is going towards me going to school.

So my question is, did any of you take out a personal loan, how long does it take to get approved and over how many years will you be paying it off? Also do you have any money saving ideas.

FH is willing to postpone the wedding but knowing I was upset about that wants to do everything he can so we can get married next year. Any advice will be super helpful.
missK Posted:

Re: Money question

I agree w/ what the other girls have said. Money has a way of making things easier and harder.

IMOPlease dont take offense but I would post pone rather than taking out a loan. If its the getting married part you want you can do that without a reception and then save for a great party. Look past the wedding reception day and after that fabulous 12 hr day you are left with loans. Save the loan taking for when you want to buy a house and that loan will pay you back some. taking one out for a wedding doesnt give you anything but a bill.
wo0shply Posted:

Re: Money question

Thanks for all your advice. I spoke to my FH yesterday and we agreed that it would wiser to wait two years and just save up the old fashion way. We know his mother would be disapointed but she will be happy we didnt go into major debt for one day. If we really need to be married, a civil service and family dinner will be fine until we have enough money to pay for a nice shindig.

I do agree that money is a huge issue in a marriage and I told FH that even though he knows how much this wedding means to me, he does not have to take out a loan so we could have this one day. If we love each other we can wait and this situation will make us stronger.

We just have one vendor, I've been dragging my feet because I did not know if I was going to be able to get the advance. Its just the deposit with the RH. FH is going to call and find out if we can get our deposit back or if we could move the date back two years if we cannot get it back.

Again thanks everyone for all your wonderful advice. I would never be offended if any one had conflicting advice, its your words of wisdom and I can either take it or listen and store it for a later time.

FH and I hope to win the lotto so we can keep our date and be happy& married. Wish us luck!
Espo22 Posted:

Re: Money question


Posted by failurebydsign

let me give you my point of view

i think if you want to hurry up and get married..do it when you plan on it..

if it means a loan then do it..but i would use something with more collateral like maybe a car so the interest can be lower..we did that last year when we needed money

im in the same situation we thought we werent going to be able to make enough by the time we needed to..and i actually had my mom take out a home equity loan and the interest in under 3% and with the wedding money we get ( if any) it will go right to that loan to be paid in full being that there are no penalties..she isnt doing the loan until jan ( 1 onth before ..so really it will only be a loan for a month

do what you have to do..because you take a loan out does not mean thatyou are going to get divorced due to financial problems

if you are going to get divorced..which i hope you will never..it will not be because you took out a loan for your wedding




its not that a couple will get divorced bc of the loan itself...but finances are the biggest causes of arguements in a marriage.

Getting a loan will put you in debt, on top of paying off a loan you need to pay everything else, mortgage, cars, insurance, groceries and so on. This will cause ppl to be stressed out, so this is how you'll start off your marriage. Couples get into fights bc it gets to them, so this is what they meant.

I saw this one couple who after a year were thinking about a divorce bc they had borrowed alot of money for their wedding and their bills just kept adding up...they fought that one wasnt doing enough to help out and the stress got to them.

Also, unfortunately life doesn't go as planned. Things unexpectedly happen so nothing is a sure thing. I can't tell you how many times i thought ok we have enough to pay X amount to so and so, then something happens and FH needs to get his car done, or i had to have 2 root canals not long ago which went over my dental and had to pay out of my own pocket.

Or i had all the money saved for an RH payment a few months ago and was like WOO HOO im ahead of the game...Yeah well, all of a sudden a CC bill from 6 years ago came up and i had to pay that off, on top of that a family emergency came up and i put up $5000 and my RH payment was gone and i had to start from scratch to save up for it.

Thats the thing, everyone says oh ill get this now and if i just do this ill pay it off right away and everything will be fine. Then same thing, other things come up, if that was the case most ppl wouldn't be in debt
rahana316 Posted:

Re: Money question


Posted by tiff940

Okay...I Totally disagree with everyone else....If You have already booked vendors and told people (like sent out save the dates) I would take out a loan... And if you plan on getting a lump sum of money soon then you can pay off the loan with that...there are pretty of low interest rates loans out there if you have good credit

Maybe others take on money differently then me...but While I do believe in saving and good spending habits I do believe you only live one life.



If you already book some vendors already, I am sure if you let them know of the situation, you can still book with them by at a later date. I dont think they will penalize you for postponing.

Just my opinion like everyone else - being in debt is the most scariest thing ever - you could unexpectedly lose your job or something else could happen.

I would either wait or save like a crazy woman.

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