I need your opinions ladies. My father said to me today that i am moving too fast with the wedding. i got engaged last year 8/7/07. Ive been saving somewhat since then and I recently went into crazy planning mode. My fiancee and I are paying for everything on our own and I am very nervous about the amount of $ it will cost. We both do not want to take out loans so I am going very low budget and shopping around. Right now I am chosing between Miller place inn and larkfield manor for and RH. I am very concerned about how top pay for all the extras but again i will be saving all year. I am looking at a July 09 wedding. Should I wait another year and get married in 2010? I am not the type of person to spend 50k on one day (not that I am against that) I've always been a penny pincher lol.
What are your thoughts? Do I have enough time to plan and pay for this by July 09? Am I moving too fast? I am starting to have doubts
MrsZtoBe
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Re: Moving too fast
It's funny you mentioned your Dad. My dad has a way of putting thoughts into my head and making me doubt things I wasn't originally doubting.
You have more than enough time to plan a wedding. LIWeddings makes you feel like you don't. (even though I love it) You can definitely shop around and get good deals on things. Trust me, you do NOT need to spend $50,000 on a wedding. I'm not into that either. We are paying for all of it ourselves too.
But, if you are having doubts, it wouldn't be terrible to put it off a year.
What does FH think? Did you have these doubts before your Dad spoke to you?
If you need to chat, you can always FM.
missjones2007
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Re: Moving too fast
who care what dad think....you have 11 months so that is still some time.....youre right you dont have to spend that much on a wedding....look around and shop for the deals with great quality!
WishfulRinne
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Re: Moving too fast
FH want to be married now LOL. He would have gotten married a year ago. He is def not into the whole wedding thing. he says its my day and he wants me to be happy. If it was up to him we would have a pool party as an RH.
I just want to be sure I have enough time to plan and pay and not go insane. I want to enjoy the planning process
coldasice217
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Re: Moving too fast
Are you very attached to the summer? A lot of places offer winter discounts for Jan and Feb. So your reception halls you're looking at may be even less expensive then. Plus, if you do winter 2010 instead of summer 2009, it gives you 6 more months to save if you're really concerned.
MrsZtoBe
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Re: Moving too fast
Posted by WishfulRinne
FH want to be married now LOL. He would have gotten married a year ago. He is def not into the whole wedding thing. he says its my day and he wants me to be happy. If it was up to him we would have a pool party as an RH.
I just want to be sure I have enough time to plan and pay and not go insane. I want to enjoy the planning process
I have been nuts about being engaged for over a year. I always wanted to have more than a year to be engaged. I really wanted to enjoy the planning process and enjoy being engaged. Because once it's over, it's over. But I truly thing a year is more than enough time to get things together. Someone even told me that it is better to have a short engagement so your nerves don't keep building and get the best of you!!
Kris2782
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Re: Moving too fast
We have been engaged since last August also and we are taking our time!! We still have 11 months left. We are in the same position as you with the money but we are gonna get some help from the parents but not much.... At first I thought I was rushing too but now I just try to do one thing at a time and not make rash decisions... We are haivng our reception at Larkfield and I couldnt be happpier
beram63
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Re: Moving too fast
well, i wouldn't let your dad influence your opinion, but only you guys can know if you're able to pull off the financial commitment. you have to really sit down and crunch the numbers (expenses vs. income). commit yourself to saving a certain amount each paycheck for the wedding, and see how it goes.
dazies1011
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Re: Moving too fast
Posted by beram63
well, i wouldn't let your dad influence your opinion, but only you guys can know if you're able to pull off the financial commitment. you have to really sit down and crunch the numbers (expenses vs. income). commit yourself to saving a certain amount each paycheck for the wedding, and see how it goes.
I agree but, I have to say this FH and I thought we were going to have to do an early 2010 wedding but a great deal fell in our laps...Thursday night in the summer and we took it and are saving alot of money, so we are now able to make it happen.
MrsDtoBe09
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Re: Moving too fast
There are certainly ways to cut back on all the extra things you need for a wedding... have you thought about diy-ing your centerpieces? You can do really nice things with candles you get from a craft store. Also, are you getting married at a church or the hall? If its the hall you can cut out the limos.
krislee316
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Re: Moving too fast
Me and FH are planning our wedding in less then a year and paying mostly on our own. It can be done, it may be a little stressful at times but we will do it just like the thousands of other married couples did! Dont let ur dad sway you and FH's decisions when all is said and done it will always be you and FH who make the decisions.
BTW I am getting married at the Larkfield Manor We are so excited I love that place!!!!
And they have a very reasonable payment plan FM me for info if u need
meli722
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Re: Moving too fast
I say do what is best for you!! you can figure out how much youll save every month , add it up, and see if itll be enough for an 09 wedding...that way you dont have to take out a loan. or push it back t late 09, early 2010.
my father is giving us about half for the wedding, FH and i are paying for the rest. we got engaged in june07, i picked 2 years away so that i can have exactly 2 tax returns to put down for the wedding (and i get a nice amount because i have a kid).....and on top of that i put away every paycheck. so we will def. have enough for our budget and not have to take out a loan......so i think you need to figure out what is best for you when it comes to plannng and budgeting $$$
Summertimegal424
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Re: Moving too fast
I think that MIller Place Inn is so nice and that you will have a beautiful day no matter what!
CandB4604
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Re: Moving too fast
I truly think your dad has no right to say that you're moving too fast. You're paying for it yourself, so there's no better time than now to research early so you can get all your prices!! And, if anything, better to take your time now than rushing with all the big things later when you should be relaxing and working on the little details.
CNC4eva3402
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Re: Moving too fast
I've been in your boat, only I was the one questioning if we were going to have enough money lolz. At first we wanted to get married in Summer of 08, but we had wayy too much credit card debt lolz so we took some time to pay that off and then once we got back on track we started planning..there was no way we wanted to take out a loan, and we plan on having children right away so we didn't want to be left with anything to pay off..we wanted to have it paid in full on that day...
What I did was write down all the income we'd be getting over the next year (even including income tax) and I wrote EXACTLY how much we'd be able to save...I made sure to subtract all the money we spend, right down to the money we spend on lunch everyday lolz.. from there I figured out how much our wedding budget would be and I made a list of everything we'd need (Reception hall, Photographer, DJ, Florist, Rings, Rehearsal dinner, honeymoon, church..etc..you get the idea) and I alotted a certain about of the budget to each thing...the things that meant the most to me, like the photographer got a bigger chunk of the budget...
I saved a TON by going with a Thursday wedding, so keep that in mind as an option! It's actually becoming pretty popular!
Good luck!
Dani777
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Re: Moving too fast
Well..I was put between a rock and a hard place...LOL. FH proposed on 12-23-07... he wanted to get married in 2008 but I KNEW there was NO way to swing that! lol. So, we agreed on Spring of 09... but then I hear the rest of my family saying that we aren't going to be able to afford it. And, i'm getting SOO many things at cost. So... We are putting a fair amount of our paycheck away a week..and just saving as MUCH as we can. Plan out a budget..maybe you can do less then 50K... Mines coming to abuot 32K after everything and to imagine that amount for one day kills me, but I know that it'll be well worth it. We're just taking things slow...not going on a splurge...since we don't want to take a loan out either. ... OR dip into FHs IRA account...which his boss explained he can take from if he pays back by the end of the year... See how much you BOTH can put away a week...and the money will add up before you know it. :)
