My current pet peeve

Have you ever had someone in your life and YOU KNOW they don't like you? And it isn't that they do anything overt or coarse or nasty... it is something else. Something in the way they look at you when they don't think you are paying attention. Something in the curl of their lip when they talk to you or the way they don't respond to you directly? Something you can't quite put your finger on but you KNOW it is there. You know that you just irk them - for some reason.

But you can't confront them. Because if you do - they get all faux surprised.

'WHAT? Really? I don't know why you would think that I don't like you!' And you - of course - can't put it into words or point to a spot in the timeline of your relationship to illustrate why you know they don't like you.

That bugs me. Don't compound it by making me look like a paranoid freak. I am not. I just KNOW when someone actively dislikes me. It's hard NOT to know.

Don't get me wrong ... i know plenty of people don't like me. And I know there are plenty of reasons not to like me. And I don't particuarly give a fat flying F about the folks who don't care for me and it isn't about trying to win anyone over. I just can't stand the emotional dishonesty and the game of pretending that I get along with people who clearly do not care one iota for me.

If I love you - I love you so much my heart will break for you.

If I like you - I will smile for you and you will know that you are a blessing to my life.

If I dislike you - I wil pretty much tell you by word or by deed. And if you ask me if I dislike you - I will tell you the things about you that make me less likely to want to be near you. And to be truthful - if I don't like you it is probably because I don't like something about myself and I recognize it in you. Most people are like that - they just don't want to admit it.

I don't hate.

And I am rarely indifferent to anyone that I know. I like you. Or I don't.

But at least I am honest about it.

ETA: This rant is not directed at anyone on this board.

Wow!!! I sense some anger

Jeannie, I totally get what you are saying. I experienced that more in my younger life than I would chose to remember. It had more to do with certain family members who caused gossip that affected the whole family. I am a very straight forward person, I tell it like it is. So if I don't like someone, they know it and they know it from my mouth.

These other people in your life, these silent haters, aren't worth your time.

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Posted by Jackie012100

Wow!!! I sense some anger

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No - not angry... frustrated.

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Posted by superkat
I think you are pretty freaking awesome, especially based on some of the things we have discussed via FM. The haters, they don't know what they are missing.

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Awww! I think you are pretty damn super too! Plus you have great taste in friends!

I know exactly how you feel, unfortunately.

At least if the dislike is acknowledged, the tension disolves a little and you can just give eachother space.

It takes a lot of maturity to let people know how you feel about them- especially if you dislike them.
Kudos to you!

I knew it wasn't directed at 'us' - you would have let us know that.

You are way cool, Jeannie.

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Posted by rojerono
But you can't confront them. Because if you do - they get all faux surprised.

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j'adore this




I come off really biatchy. So many people think/thought I disliked them or hated them, etc. when that was totally not the case.

I secretly like that.

Jeannie-

You rule. I totally understand what you are talking about. I am one of those people pleasing people. I try really hard to like everyone and if I know there is someone that does not like me I find myself doing stupid shitt to change their mind. I don't know why I care so much. Maybe this crazy idea that I have to be perfect. My mom used to call me the perfect child. WOO HOO to creating a stigma. Remind me to never tell my kid that they are perfect!

I think you are awesome Jeannie.
Screw the people that don't like you. Let 'em go. They are not worth your time.

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Posted by itslaurie.

I come off really biatchy. So many people think/thought I disliked them or hated them, etc. when that was totally not the case.

I secretly like that.

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This happens to me from time to time and I like something about it too. I love when people get to know me and then say; 'Wow, you are so great! I thought at first that you were at total biatch but I was wrong!'

I love that!

most people dislike me before they like me, b/c I come off as brusque or abrasive sometimes, which I am.

it depends on how I enter a room or place...smiling or not.

it also depends on my mood. but I am generallly not an 'overly' friendly person.

but if I really dislike you, I almost always will just come out and say it.

and if I like you, after 5 minutes, you will know that too. no matter what kind of mood I am in.

I can always sense 'nasty' in a person too...like true NASTY, not inabadmoodtoday nasty.

and those people get my hairs up, and I am immediately evil to them...sort of to say...'I know you. I read you. and this is all you'll get from me'

and finally, I do have at least one someone like this in my life. for years she was very covert about it...it was something only I could sense...but then I guess she got bored with that, and started to be aggressively nasty.

finally I was vindicated. and her star has fallen immensely with those I care about. so it's all good.

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Posted by lipglossjunky73

I SO know what you mean - I encounter that a lot in my field too, unfortunately....

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Sorry to crash..but your baby is absolutely PRECIOUS!!! Congrats!!

* My FH's mother treats me this way...it's quite irritating. I know how you feel. Except w/ her, I think it's a jealousy issue...sick as that sounds.

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Posted by JessicaM.

most people dislike me before they like me, b/c I come off as brusque or abrasive sometimes, which I am.

it depends on how I enter a room or place...smiling or not.

it also depends on my mood. but I am generallly not an 'overly' friendly person.

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ok, this is the total opposite impression I have of you from when I met you!

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Posted by MrsD06

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Posted by JessicaM.

most people dislike me before they like me, b/c I come off as brusque or abrasive sometimes, which I am.

it depends on how I enter a room or place...smiling or not.

it also depends on my mood. but I am generallly not an 'overly' friendly person.

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ok, this is the total opposite impression I have of you from when I met you!

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dude, they had just given me a free choco fountain...I have never been happier!

you should have met me the day I made final payment

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dude, they had just given me a free choco fountain...I have never been happier!

you should have met me the day I made final payment

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ok, I'm talking about BEFORE the whole chocolate fountain thing ...total first impression

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Posted by MrsD06

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dude, they had just given me a free choco fountain...I have never been happier!

you should have met me the day I made final payment

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ok, I'm talking about BEFORE the whole chocolate fountain thing ...total first impression

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you're sweet.

it all depends on my mood. I am generally outgoing, but not 'friendly' like...I don't want to be everyone's BFF, but I'll talk to you about nonsense until kingdom come...

I'm weird.

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Posted by MrsDtoBe

So not related, but I have a BIG pet peeve these days....WOMEN WITH UNPEDICURED, SCRAGGLY LOOKING TOES...IN FLIP FLOPS OR SANDALS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! This to me is SO revolting...

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This is me today.

except not ... more like