after reading christine2010 post yesterday i thought this would be an interesting topic.
i asked my bm to be involved because i love them and i know they will be helping me with the planning.
as for the bm dress- which was the topic yesterday i want them to look and feel great that day. that is the reason why i am allowing them to choose a dress that would work best on them. personally i feel weird telling someone what to wear but thats just me plus they are paying for the dress, shoes and accessories.
in the end they all said they wouldnt have had a problem if i had picked the dress but they are so happy and grateful that they are getting to choose.
soooooo what are you feelings and thoughts?
angel1219eyez
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Re: my day my way
i am doin the same thing... i am giving them two colors to choose from and allowing them to go pick out the dress that they want... the only thing is i want them to all have the same dress and the only person i would want to have a different dress is my MOH but i do agree with what your saying..ive been in weddings and i HATED the dress and was upset i had to spend all that money on sumthing i hated lol so im letting them pick out their own
MrsC2010
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Re: my day my way
its hard bc i have 9 girls so i don't want it to look random if all the girls pick different dresses. I do want them to be comfortable though so I am going to pick out a few that I like and then have the girls try them on and see what works best for them.
Lsorrent
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Re: my day my way
I have a total of 8 girls, so it's hard to please everyone.
With that said, when we start dress shopping, I'm bringing my two sisters (MOH's) and my FSIL, and that's it. Between the three of them, they will find something they like and the rest of the girls are ok with that. I've already discussed this with everyone, explaining that it's just too much to take all 8 of them out at the same time.
My girls are very trusting in my taste, they know I won't put them in something hideous or something that makes them look terrible. And they all know the color....red.
ETA: I have picked out several dresses online that I like and showed them to most of my girls. They all like every one that I've picked. And believe me, my sisters and FSIL would DEFINITELY tell me if they thought otherwise.
rocketsummer17
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Re: my day my way
See this is a very tricky situation. I know that some brides are very 'this is the dress and thats that' whereas others are more laid back about it...It all really depends on the bride and what her vision of her day is... That being said, I think I am more of a 'wear this and if you dont like it oh well' kind of person. I know of some people who have done that for their weddings and to me thats fine. I think as long as the dress is somewhat affordable and helps complete the look of that day I dont see why a BM would have a problem with it.
regy_k
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Re: my day my way
I am not having a BP, only an MOH who is flying in from another country, and she can wear whatever she wants. i also feel weird telling anybody what to wear. i know that when i was a BM i hated that somebody else had a say (and i didn't) in what i'm gonna wear and how i am going to look like. don't want to do that to anyone else. i think what ur doing is a great idea!
KRISTIND
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Re: my day my way
i basically sent emails around getting opinions and then my mohs are going to try it on...but i am having final say with mohs..i have 10 girls and it would be too many opinions...my day my way
S2BHeNNeSSeY226
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Re: my day my way
I dont think i'm going to have any bm's just my MOH because we want to keep it really simple. So i'll probably give her a few options and whichever she tries on that we can both agree on we'll pick. Even though it's my day I want her to like it if she's buying it and feel great that day too.
asg450
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Re: my day my way
I'm actually doing the same thing. Choosing the color and letting them choose the dress. I have suggested dresses I think would like nice for each BM; but the decision is up to them. I just asked that they keep the material and length the same and that they choose something that is presentable for church. But if a bride wants all the dresses to be the same, then go ahead. It's your wedding so you do what you want to do.
Jna2010
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Re: my day my way
i like the way the same (or similar with different cuts) bm dresses looks in pictures and i dont think its wierd telling them what to wear since this is expected as a bm.
I just think that everyone should do whatever they want for their own wedding, its their vision and whatever and by agreeing to be a bridesmaid i dont think you should question it, not that you should be their slave lol
GonnaBeeMrsG
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Re: my day my way
I am having 5 girls all together and I am sticking with 2 things...
tea length and my colors thats it.
I feel the same as far as they need to feel comfortable and THEY are paying for it!
I am also allowing them to wear diff styles of the same dress if they choose.
GonnaBeeMrsG
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Re: my day my way
Posted by rocketsummer17
See this is a very tricky situation. I know that some brides are very 'this is the dress and thats that' whereas others are more laid back about it...It all really depends on the bride and what her vision of her day is... That being said, I think I am more of a 'wear this and if you dont like it oh well' kind of person. I know of some people who have done that for their weddings and to me thats fine. I think as long as the dress is somewhat affordable and helps complete the look of that day I dont see why a BM would have a problem with it.
I agree it depends on you and your vision! Since I am having a Sunday Afternoon wedding it is less formal and more laid back all together so thats why I am the way I am.
christine2010
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Re: my day my way
i will be deciding their dress no matter how stressful it is going to be.
i will also say that i want there hair half up/half down, not too extravagant.
they all have to have the same style of shoe (high heels not wedges). & i will also pick a color.
it is my wedding & if/when i am in their bridal party i will keep my mouth shut & wear what they tell me to.
KRISTIND
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Re: my day my way
Posted by christine2010
i will be deciding their dress no matter how stressful it is going to be.
i will also say that i want there hair half up/half down, not too extravagant.
they all have to have the same style of shoe (high heels not wedges). & i will also pick a color.
it is my wedding & if/when i am in their bridal party i will keep my mouth shut & wear what they tell me to.
love it!!!
mariedsgn
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Re: my day my way
I am going to pick the color - and have the BM's pick the dress. I have 8 girls in my wedding and they are different sizes, and I want them ALL to feel COMFORTABLE!!!
JMO
Rosalind_75
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Re: my day my way
Posted by Lsorrent
ETA: I have picked out several dresses online that I like and showed them to most of my girls. They all like every one that I've picked. And believe me, my sisters and FSIL would DEFINITELY tell me if they thought otherwise.
i had some ideas for my moh/sister and yesterday she shocked me!!!
she said she would like something more classy. we had picked some dresses that were short. she thinks something long would be more suitable for my wedding she has a lot ot tatoos and would like the dress to cover most of it
ummmmm ok
FallBride2010
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Re: my day my way
I will pick the color and ask them for their opinions on the dress. I want them to be happy, too. As for shoes and hair...I dont care what they do. I think them buying a dress they will never wear again is enough...they can at least choose shoes they might wear again. And hair...I want everyone to be happy with the way they look...and dont want to force anyone to have to go to a salon
Rosalind_75
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Re: my day my way
Posted by christine2010
i will also say that i want there hair half up/half down, not too extravagant.
they all have to have the same style of shoe (high heels not wedges). & i will also pick a color.
my moh and a bm asked about hair and shoes the other day.
is this something i need to decide? i rather not
Its2Snappy
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Re: my day my way
I have been a BM and MOH. I always wore the dress that the bride picked without complaints. I don't like the way it looks when the BMs all wear different dresses even if it is the same color.
Nina1010
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Re: my day my way
I think you are such a great friend...LOL
I am somewhat doing the same thing...to an extent. My BMS are diff shapes/sizes so I wants a dress that will flatter all of them. They are going to be in our pictures forever.... So I am choosing the color and prob select 4-5 dresses for them to agree on. Most of them are good with what I pick, but I like having some say and giving them an option. I am also moving more towards a Party dress rather than a BM dress so they actually can wear it again one day. HTH
edited to add that my cousin picked out a party dress for her wedding which took place on a cruise. We got to choose the color. Same dress, we all had diff colors. I thought it was a bit odd, but her pictures are great and its what she wanted.
