My FMIL decided that she'd rather go on a cruise than come to my bridal shower! Nice Huh

Kathy116 Posted: Nov 09, 2003 08:39 PM

My FMIL decided that she'd rather go on a cruise than come to my bridal shower! Nice Huh

I just found this out tonight. It's not that she HAS to take this cruise at this time...she could go one week later (they're retired and travel ALL THE TIME).

FI wasn't surprised, he said his mother and step-father have always been the most selfish people on the face of the earth.

FI never received a dime or any help from them, not even emotional encouragement when he decided to become a veternarian. They told him he was stupid for doing it...now that he's a success...they take all the credit and constantly tell their friends that their son is a Dr.

She makes me sick. I guess it's because my parents are so giving. FI has always said that my own parents treat him better and give him more than his. Oh well.

Thanks for letting me vent.

aliciahelene Posted: Nov 09, 2003 08:43 PM

Re: My FMIL decided that she'd rather go on a cruise than come to my bridal shower! Nice Huh

You will have a great shower anyhow because you will hopefully be surrounded by people who are truly happy for you...it'll be better that way!!!! Im sorry though!

July2004Bride Posted: Nov 09, 2003 08:44 PM

Re: My FMIL decided that she'd rather go on a cruise than come to my bridal shower! Nice Huh

I'm sorry to hear that! That is very selfish of her but just be thankful that you have a loving and supportive family. Try not to let it get you down too much..

BriBri529 Posted: Nov 09, 2003 08:44 PM

Re: My FMIL decided that she'd rather go on a cruise than come to my bridal shower! Nice Huh

I am sorry to here this . . . some people are so self-absorbed. Don't let it ruin things for you . . .

larryswife2be Posted: Nov 09, 2003 08:48 PM

Re: My FMIL decided that she'd rather go on a cruise than come to my bridal shower! Nice Huh

Don't worry about her, you'll have a blast anyway!!!

Kathy116 Posted: Nov 09, 2003 08:49 PM

Re: My FMIL decided that she'd rather go on a cruise than come to my bridal shower! Nice Huh

I know in the long run, her not being there really isn't going to hurt me, my family will be there and that's what matters to me...I'm just momentarily aggravated with her behavior, that she has been and still is so selfish.

Sometimes you give people the benefit of the doubt, hoping that they've changed...and then you hear something like this and realize she's the same selfish woman, and will always probably be that way.

IT's too bad.

hugs213 Posted: Nov 09, 2003 08:51 PM

Re: My FMIL decided that she'd rather go on a cruise than come to my bridal shower! Nice Huh

Well just know that it has nothing to do with you. She is generally a selfish woman> Your shower will be full of love and people that are truly happy for you. Don't let her ruin it for you.

Kathy116 Posted: Nov 09, 2003 08:54 PM

Re: My FMIL decided that she'd rather go on a cruise than come to my bridal shower! Nice Huh

It's also the way she went about this....

my mother told her 8 months ago when the bridal shower would be...she said she was thinking about going on a cruise, but that now she knows when the shower is, she'll definately come to the shower and take the cruise the following week, or whenever.

Then a few months ago she says that she can't come to the shower because she wants to stay home with her husband because he's sick.

Now a few weeks before the shower it leaks out that she really is going on this cruise.

My aggravation with her will pass soon, I'm too busy to waste energy on her...but I tell you, it really helps being able to vent with all you ladies! Thanks

112903 Posted: Nov 09, 2003 09:31 PM

Re: My FMIL decided that she'd rather go on a cruise than come to my bridal shower! Nice Huh

It doesn't matter she will look like the idoit.... You will have a better shower anyway if she isn't there... Like someone else said the people who are happy for you and love you will be there....

AtticaQT Posted: Nov 09, 2003 09:47 PM

Re: My FMIL decided that she'd rather go on a cruise than come to my bridal shower! Nice Huh

OMG - How insanely RUDE and SELFISH!! If she doesnt want to make an effort to be there - then you truly dont need her there - You mom will be there which is so much more important - and your FH even acknowledges this insane behavior so that is good.

jpdagame Posted: Nov 09, 2003 09:50 PM

Re: My FMIL decided that she'd rather go on a cruise than come to my bridal shower! Nice Huh

I'm sorry to hear that... But just think how much better it will be without her there

jvs77 Posted: Nov 09, 2003 09:52 PM

Re: My FMIL decided that she'd rather go on a cruise than come to my bridal shower! Nice Huh

Wow - that is terribly selfish of her. I agree with the other ladies - don't dwell on it and let it get you down. You will have an Amazing shower with lots of family and friends who love you!!

allure Posted: Nov 09, 2003 09:57 PM

Re: My FMIL decided that she'd rather go on a cruise than come to my bridal shower! Nice Huh

Soon you will be a Mrs.

Maribelle7777 Posted: Nov 09, 2003 10:20 PM

Re: My FMIL decided that she'd rather go on a cruise than come to my bridal shower! Nice Huh

That's horrible. How can a mother do that to her son and future daughter in law?

HOwever you will have THE BEST time of your life at your shower. And when everyone asks where your FMIL is - tell them the truth. They'll make their own conclusions

pschica Posted: Nov 09, 2003 10:23 PM

Re: My FMIL decided that she'd rather go on a cruise than come to my bridal shower! Nice Huh

RichsBride Posted: Nov 09, 2003 11:22 PM

Re: My FMIL decided that she'd rather go on a cruise than come to my bridal shower! Nice Huh

I can relate Kathy-my a$$wipe SIL (Dh's only relative on Long Island) did not attend my shower-in fact she didn't even RSVP!!!
She's 55 years old & was leaving for Europe the next week with her married boyfriend. So she was too busy to even send a card OR a gift.
I find that behavior unacceptable-therefore I refuse to speak to her or socialize with her.
Your MIL is a self centered woman, but do not harp on it w/your Fi as I did with mine not realizing that he was hurt even more than me!
Just let it go, your shower will be lovely & the people that care will be there!

mishandgerard Posted: Nov 09, 2003 11:39 PM

Re: My FMIL decided that she'd rather go on a cruise than come to my bridal shower! Nice Huh

you will probably have a better time wit out her there! this way you get all the lime light and she can't take it from you.

Thats still mean of her though

[email protected] Posted: Nov 10, 2003 01:27 AM

Re: My FMIL decided that she'd rather go on a cruise than come to my bridal shower! Nice Huh

If she is like that, it's better off anyway that she is not there. (I understand though!)

kathleenmarie Posted: Nov 10, 2003 05:58 AM

Re: My FMIL decided that she'd rather go on a cruise than come to my bridal shower! Nice Huh

You cant change people. My mother left my brother and I on the street to go live with her then boyfriend, now husband. I went to school and became a teacher, I will pay it off the rest of my life, but i'm proud I made it. She pretends it never happened. Just say 'have a good time', and know the people that matter are the people that will be there. Good luck. Your going to have a great time anyway.