My GF needs serious help!!!

My GF's 17 months old daughter Kate is turning into a little tantrum queen. She is acting like a spoiled brat and its getting worse and worse. For example:
my GF would be outside with Kate trying to put her in a stroller to go home. Kate doesn't want to go in a stroller, starts screaming, bending her back, dropping on the ground while screaming on top of her lungs etc. She reacts like that to ANYTHINgG that is not to her liking, many many times a day!

In the morning, refuses to go into her hi-chair for breakfast, throwing the same kind of tantrum. During meals she throws food on the floor.

Also, she ONLY throws the tantrums when there are no people immediately around them. They would be waiting by the elevator with Kate doing her usual thing. However, when the elevator comes and there is another child in there, she stops acting up immediately!

My GF and her DH are desparate, they have tried everything: saying 'NO', spanking her hand when she does that (which she seems to think is a game), trying to restrain her by holding her etc. The thing is that Kate knows she is being punished for rude behavior and seems to think it's joke! She is very smart but VERY stubborn kid. My friend is on the verge of a nervous breakdown. She knows she needs to stop this behavior before it's too late! Your advice is desperately needed! What can she do? BTDT moms, please help with advice!

Re: My GF needs serious help!!!

I don't know if she's too young to try this but everybody has something they value (toy, video) and perhaps if she has a temper tantrum, that favorite toy will be taken away for a day or so until she behaves better.
Anyway, thats what Dr Phil says on his shows when parents have problems with their children. Its worth a try.
He always says that you have to take away something they really value to get them to stop this behavior.

Re: My GF needs serious help!!!

I feel as if you just described my 15 month old daughter. She acts exactly the same way except she doesnt stop when people come around. I spoke to my pediatrician and he told me that whatever I do, I need to be consistent and always do the same thing. He also told me that she will not fully understand the word no until she is 2. When she engages in these tantrums and we are at home, I walk away and let her scream. If she is tantruming to get out of doing something, I dont let her escape. For instance if she doesnt want to go in her highchair, I put her in anyway because it is time to eat breakfast. If she is screaming because she wants me to pick her up, I will not pick her up until she is quiet. I have tried all sorts of discipline with her as well and the only thing that seems to be working is ignoring her and letting her realize that her tantrums do not get her what she wants even if we are out in public and people are staring at us.