Need advice about FMIL!!!!!!

OK Girls...This is a FMIL situation...I need your advice...FIL's get to invite 40 people to our wedding...Thats great for them because they only have 20 family members which leaves 20 more for friends...Well, FMIL doesn't think that is enough because she wants to invite EVERYONE that she works with and friends that she sees maybe ONCE a year!!!! FH and I have wanted a small wedding with family and close friends...Everyone has had to cut their list but she thinks she shouldn't have to...She offered to pay for anyone else that goes over her number but that is not the point...FMIL hasn't offered to help with anything to do with the wedding except this, which makes me think she is extremely selfish!!! Of course she will offer to pay because it will only benefit herself!!! I am so upset!!! Of course there are people that FH and I would like to invite but its about being with the people you care about most and the people that care about you most!!! I know that I am not going to know everyone at my wedding but I also don't want to be introduced to 50 people that are her friends that I don't know....Please help girls!!! Am I being irrational???

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Posted by Happybride2005

you're not being irrational. did she say why she wanted to invite all these people.

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She told FH 'How can I not invite everyone in my office?' He tried to tell her that we are all cutting our lists and we can't invite everyone that we would like to...She doesn't want to hear it!! I feel like she thinks its her wedding!!!! We know some of her co-workers but most of them we don't so I don't see how she can be this way...My parents are paying for our reception and I think giving her 40 people was more than generous considering they don't have many family members.

is there anyway fh could talk to her. i hope it gets better

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Posted by Happybride2005

is there anyway fh could talk to her. i hope it gets better

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This has me so upset right now...Thanks!

kara, i know EXACTLY what you are going through

i wanted only 100 people tops at out wedding but it sturned in 175 prob will be close to 200 when invites go out

it took alot fo rme to let go an dbe like
'well if they (inlaws) are paying for who they want, why it is such a big deal to me.....more presents in my opinion

so my parents are having only 5 people on their 'side' and my in laws have about 100

you just really have to pick your battles and for me, it really wasnt about me having less people, but i just didnt want her to get her way
when i realized that, i let go

you have to decide whats important

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Posted by Anti-Bride

kara, i know EXACTLY what you are going through

i wanted only 100 people tops at out wedding but it sturned in 175 prob will be close to 200 when invites go out

it took alot fo rme to let go an dbe like
'well if they (inlaws) are paying for who they want, why it is such a big deal to me.....more presents in my opinion

so my parents are having only 5 people on their 'side' and my in laws have about 100

you just really have to pick your battles and for me, it really wasnt about me having less people, but i just didnt want her to get her way
when i realized that, i let go

you have to decide whats important

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Thanks Jen
Everything is never good enough for her...She always has something to say...And of course she didn't offer to help pay for anything else except her extra friends...So sad

well that is different than me...my inlaws are paying for the majority of the wedding

hope everything works out

oh maybe you can show her an etiquette print out that tell show brides do not have to invite co-workers and such and maybe shell get it that she doesnt get to either

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Posted by Anti-Bride

well that is different than me...my inlaws are paying for the majority of the wedding

hope everything works out

oh maybe you can show her an etiquette print out that tell show brides do not have to invite co-workers and such and maybe shell get it that she doesnt get to either

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Thanks jen