need advice; BM not cooperating!

I have a bridesmaid who is not cooperating and its really making me upset! I'm not overly demanding or anything, in fact, I'm very low maintenence.
I told her and my one other bridesmaid what I would like for them to wear; I didn't even ask that they buy a specific dress....just a floor lenght dress in a particular color. They both asked for suggestions; I chose 3 different ones for them to pick from, and she is not interested at all. I even tried to make it fun by suggesting that we go buy them all together and then go out to lunch; but she is not responsive. I understnad that people have a lot going on, and my wedding is NOT their first priority, but it's starting to get very frusterating b/c I have been appeasing her for a very long time and now we are only 12 weeks away. This has to get done! Any advice?

i think you need to have a heart to heart talk and make sure theres not an underlying issue that you're not aware of.
your wedding in 12 weeks away and she still doesn't have her dress-you've been more than patient. you deserve to know what her problem is.

You should tell her to get her A$$ in gear. 'This is the deal, I have been more than patient and the wedding is only 12 weeks away. I picked out the dress, and you will buy it , shut the fu** up and wear it BI***!!!

Yeah, and out loud you say, 'I feel you havn't been taking this seriously and you are taking the fun out of this and adding stress. Please get the dress and let's keep things moving'

Wish you the best.

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Posted by tricia3381

i think you need to have a heart to heart talk and make sure theres not an underlying issue that you're not aware of.
your wedding in 12 weeks away and she still doesn't have her dress-you've been more than patient. you deserve to know what her problem is.

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I agree

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Posted by JenMike331

i totally understand....what i don't exactly get is the fact that people say yes to being in a bridal party knowing full well the amount of money that will have to be shelled out and the responsibilties that they will have and instead they say yes and then they either sit back and do nothing or they act rude and won't cooperate....maybe u need to be more strict about things and say since this isnt working this is the dress i chose and this is the day to try it on and get measured to order it

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not even!!!! there are absolutel NO expenses other than the dress. I specifically requested NO showers and NO bachelorette party b/c its just not my thing....I'm the last one of my friends to get married and I feel like we've done all of these things so many times....i just didn't want them. All I asked was that my 2 closest friends walk down the aisle, support me, help me get ready, and BE THERE FOR ME.
I agree with you about the expense part, but that doesn't even apply. She is just being so difficult. I'm ready to just tell her to forget it.........

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Posted by Future Mrs.

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Posted by JenMike331

i totally understand....what i don't exactly get is the fact that people say yes to being in a bridal party knowing full well the amount of money that will have to be shelled out and the responsibilties that they will have and instead they say yes and then they either sit back and do nothing or they act rude and won't cooperate....maybe u need to be more strict about things and say since this isnt working this is the dress i chose and this is the day to try it on and get measured to order it

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not even!!!! there are absolutel NO expenses other than the dress. I specifically requested NO showers and NO bachelorette party b/c its just not my thing....I'm the last one of my friends to get married and I feel like we've done all of these things so many times....i just didn't want them. All I asked was that my 2 closest friends walk down the aisle, support me, help me get ready, and BE THERE FOR ME.
I agree with you about the expense part, but that doesn't even apply. She is just being so difficult. I'm ready to just tell her to forget it.........

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wow! thats even worse! well hey maybe this calls for a 'go out to eat and talk' night out? and tell her how ur feeling say what u just said to me how its not like ur asking for the same things that YOU did for all of them! but only to do one simple thing and u feel like ur not getting the support that u thought u would get from ur closest of friends

Wow! I feel your pain. I am having some issues getting my BM's to get measured. But if it came down to 12 wks. I'd get the damn dress and tell her, here be there at x time and wear this. I would be infuriated!
But I think a non-drink night is past due. She might be jealous of you (I have one of those). get to the root of this or you may lose your friendship with her!
Good Luck!

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Posted by Val

You should tell her to get her A$$ in gear. 'This is the deal, I have been more than patient and the wedding is only 12 weeks away. I picked out the dress, and you will buy it , shut the fu** up and wear it BI***!!!

Yeah, and out loud you say, 'I feel you havn't been taking this seriously and you are taking the fun out of this and adding stress. Please get the dress and let's keep things moving'

Wish you the best.

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I couldn't agree more!